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: It's like Equatorial Africa on our side of the building. Cecily Pigeon
: Well, last night it was so bad, Gwen and I sat there in Nature's own cooling ourselves in front of the open fridge. Can you imagine such a thing? Oscar Madison
: Well, I'm working on it.
[laughter from the ladies
] Gwendolyn Pigeon
: Actually, it's impossible to get a night's sleep. Ces and I really don't know what to do about it. Oscar Madison
: Why don't you sleep with an air conditioner? Gwendolyn Pigeon
: Well, we haven't got one. Oscar Madison
: I know, but we have.
[more peals of laughter from the ladies
: Felix, I'd like you to meet two elevator acquaintances of mine. Gwendolyn and Cecily. Cecily Pigeon
: No, Cecily and Gwendolyn. Oscar Madison
: Oh, Terribly sorry, Cecily and Gwendolyn. Eh, don't tell me. Eh, Robin? No, Cardinal? Gwendolyn Pigeon
: No, Wrong both times, It's Pigeon. Oscar Madison
: Cecily and Gwendolyn Pigeon, The Pigeon sisters. Gwendolyn Pigeon
: Or as our friends at Chelsea use to call us, the Cuckoo Pigeon sisters.
: I'm sorry, I've forgotten your name. Felix Ungar
: Felix. Gwendolyn Pigeon
: Oh, right, Felix. Cecily Pigeon
: Like the cat. Gwendolyn Pigeon
: Oh, well, the Pigeon sisters had better beware of the cat.
: I'll be in the way. Gwendolyn Pigeon
: How could you possibly be in anyone's way? Oscar Madison
: You want to see a typewritten list? Gwendolyn Pigeon
: Oh, haven't you said enough already?
: I haven't cried since I was fourteen!