Mary Alice Young
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Quotes for
Mary Alice Young (Character)
from "Desperate Housewives" (2004)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"Desperate Housewives: Pilot (#1.1)" (2004)
Susan Mayer: I just don't know how I'm going to survive this.
Mary Alice: Listen to me. We all have moments of desperation, but if we can face them head on, that's when we find out how strong we really are.

Mary Alice: [narrating voice over, about Edie] Susan had met the enemy. And she? Was a slut.

[first lines]
Mary Alice: [voice over narration] My name is Mary Alice Young. When you read this morning's paper you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week. Normally there is never anything newsworthy about my life, but that all changed last Thursday. Of course, everything seemed quite normal at first. I made breakfast for my family, I performed my chores, I completed my projects, I ran my errands. In truth, I spent the day as I spent every other day, quietly polishing the routine of my life, until it gleamed with perfection. That's why it was so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet and retrieve a revolver that had never been used. My body was discovered by my neighbor, Mrs. Martha Huber, who'd been startled by a strange popping sound. Her curiosity aroused, Mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced. After some initial hesitation, she decided to return the blender she had borrowed from me six months before.

Mary Alice: [voice over narration] And, for a moment, Mrs. Huber stood motionless in her kitchen, grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy. But only for a moment. If there was one thing Mrs. Huber was known for, it was her ability to look on the bright side.

[first lines]
Mary Alice: [voice over narration] Everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. Everyone, that is, except her own family.


"Desperate Housewives: Ah, But Underneath (#1.2)" (2004)
[a motorcycle cop pulls Lynette over]
Officer Hayes: License and registration, please.
[she hands them to him]
Officer Hayes: Ma'am, you know why I pulled you over?
[she looks at the kids in the back]
Lynette Scavo: I have a theory.
Officer Hayes: The kids were jumping up and down. They should be sitting, wearing their seatbelts.
Lynette Scavo: I yelled at them. They never listen to me. It's very frustrating.
Officer Hayes: Well, you have to find a way to control them. After all, that's your job.
[he hands her the ticket and walks off]
Mary Alice Young: [narrating] Though he'd been a policeman for six years, Officer Hayes had never found himself in a truly dangerous situation. Then again, he had never before told a woman how to raise her children.
[Lynette furiously gets out of her car and slowly approaches Officer Hayes]
Lynette Scavo: Are you saying I'm a bad mother?
Officer Hayes: Ma'am, you need to get back in your car, please.
Lynette Scavo: I have no help. My husband's always away on business.
Officer Hayes: I'm gonna have to ask you to step back now.
Lynette Scavo: My babysitter joined the Witness Relocation Program! I haven't slept through the night...
[Officer Hayes slowly reaches for his gun]
Officer Hayes: Ma'am.
Lynette Scavo: ...in six years. And for you to stand there and judge me...
[she stands in front of Officer Hayes, who's terrified. He looks at the children, who are acting terrible]
Officer Hayes: Okay. I'm not gonna give you a ticket. I'm just gonna let you off with a warning.
Lynette Scavo: I accept your apology.
[she takes the warning, sighs, and gets back in the car]
Officer Hayes: Buckle up.

[first lines]
Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] An odd thing happens when we die, our senses vanish. Taste, touch, smell and sound become a distant memory. But our sight? Ah, our sight expands. And we can suddenly see the world we left behind so clearly. Of course, most of what's visible to the dead could also be seen by the living, if they would only take the time to look.

Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] Susan was furious with Edie for using a dog to ingratiate herself with its owner. She was also furious with Mike for not seeing through this blatant maneuver. But most of all, she was furious with herself for not having thought of it first.

[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] Yes, as I look back at the world I left behind, it's all so clear to me. The beauty that waits to be unveiled, the mysteries that long to be uncovered, but people so rarely stop to take a look, they just keep moving. It's a shame, really... There is so much... to see.
[the toy chest comes out of the lake]

Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] It's a rare man that understands the value of a perfect rose.


"Desperate Housewives: Pretty Little Picture (#1.3)" (2004)
[first lines]
Mary Alice Young: [voice over narration] After I died, I began to surrender the parts of myself that were no longer necessary. My desires, beliefs, ambitions, doubts. Every trace of my humanity was discarded. I discovered, when moving through eternity, it helps to travel lightly. In fact, I held onto only one thing. My memory. It's astonishing to look back on the world I left behind. I remember it all. Every single detail. Like my friend, Bree Van De Kamp. I remember the easy confidence of her smile, the gentle elegance of her hands, the refined warmth of her voice...
Bree: Bye.
Mary Alice Young: [voice over narration] ...But what I remember most about Bree...,
Bree: Rex, wasn't that a lovely...?
Mary Alice Young: [voice over narration] ...was the look of fear in her eyes. Bree had started to realize her world was unraveling. And for a woman who despised loose ends, that was unacceptable...

Bree: Oh, Rex, you look so tired.
Rex: I didn't sleep. This damn thing is so uncomfortable.
Bree: Well, why don't you move back upstairs, and sleep in my bed.
Rex: We're in marriage counseling, Bree. I think that would confuse things.
Bree: It's just... I miss you.
Rex: I know you do. Of course, if I don't start getting some sleep pretty soon, I'll be forced to move back upstairs out of sheer exhaustion.
Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] Yes, Bree was afraid of many things. But if there was one thing she wasn't afraid of..., it was a challenge.

Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] As the sun slowly settled on Wisteria Lane, an unsettled Susan racked her brain to find a way into her own house.
[Susan holds the plant in front of her naked body and sidesteps her way down the steps and toward the garden shed on the left side of the house which is also locked. She tiptoes to the window and tries to open it, but it's stuck. She puts the plant down and uses two hands to open it, but slips and falls on her back into her shrubs]
Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] Lying naked in her shrubs, it occurred to Susan that this could be the most humiliating moment of her life.
[Mike walks by and notices her naked in the shrubs]
Mike Delfino: Susan?
Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] She was wrong.
Mike Delfino: [averting his eyes and grinning] Uh...whatcha' doing?
Susan Mayer: Locked myself out...naked.
Mike Delfino: Oh.
Susan Mayer: And then I fell.
[crosses her legs]
Susan Mayer: So how are you?
Mike Delfino: Good, good. I just got back. I've been gone all day, and I got your message about dinner, and, um, I would love to come if the invite still stands.
Susan Mayer: It's a date.
Mike Delfino: Alright, I um, assume the dress is, uh, casual.
Susan Mayer: Yeah, it's...it's casual.
[Mike nods, grinning as he walks off. Susan squeals and covers herself with the plants]

[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: [narrating voice over] Yes, I remember the world, every detail. And what I remember most is how afraid I was
[shot of Bree holding Mary Alice's audio tape]
Mary Alice Young: . What a waste.
[Bree looks out the window]
Mary Alice Young: You see, to live in fear is not to live at all. I wish I could tell this to those I left behind.
[shot of Gabrielle and John sleeping in bed together]
Mary Alice Young: But would it do any good? Probably not
[Gabrielle looks out the window]
Mary Alice Young: . I understand now. There will always be those who face their fears
[shot of Susan looking through pictures, she looks out the window]
Mary Alice Young: . And there will always be those... who run away
[shot of Paul hammering a "For Sale" sign into the yard of his house]
Mary Alice Young: .


"Desperate Housewives: Suspicious Minds (#1.9)" (2004)
[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: People are complicated creatures. On the one hand, able to perform great acts of charity. On the other, capable of the most underhanded forms of betrayal. It's a constant battle that rages within all of us - between the better angels of our nature and the temptation of our inner demons. And, sometimes, the only way to ward off the darkness... is to shine the light of compassion.
Gabrielle Solis: [to Susan] They took him away in handcuffs.
[sobs]

[first lines]
Mary Alice Young: Gabrielle was waiting for her next great idea. Her first great idea came when she was 15 after her stepfather paid her a late-night visit. She bought a bus ticket to New York the very next day. Her next occurred five years later when she decided to seduce a famous fashion photographer. One week later, she began her career as a runway model, which soon led to her next great idea - her decision to marry Carlos Solis. Before she knew it, she had jumped off the runway and moved to the suburbs. Her most recent great idea was borne out of her boredom with her new life. That's how she came to start an affair with her teenage gardener, which was cut short by a tragic accident. So, once again, Gabrielle was in need of a great idea.


"Desperate Housewives: Anything You Can Do (#1.7)" (2004)
[last lines]
Mary Alice: Competition, it means different things to different people. But whether it's a friendly rivalry... or a fight to the death... the end result is the same. There will be winners... and there will be losers. Of course, the trick is to know which battles to fight. You see, no victory comes without a price.

[first lines]
Mary Alice: Competition. It means different things to different people. In suburbia, it means keeping up with the Joneses. On Wisteria Lane, that means keeping up with Bree Van De Kamp. Everyone knew Bree had the nicest lawn in the neighborhood, and no one begrudged her this. No one, that is, except Martha Hoover, whose own lawn paled in comparison. No matter how carefully she trimmed, or how lovingly she watered, or how generously she fertilized, the grass was always greener on the other side of the fence.


"Desperate Housewives: Your Fault (#1.13)" (2005)
[first lines]
Mary Alice Young: There is a look that parents of well-behaved children give to the parents of the not-so-well-behaved. It's a look that says, "You should learn to control your kids. After all, they're your responsibility."
[Susan gives Lynette that look]
Mary Alice Young: Of course, it was easy for Susan to feel smug with a daughter like Julie. She always brought home straight A's. She was helpful around the house. She was bright, affectionate and considerate of others. To her mother's way of thinking, Julie was the perfect child. Unfortunately, Susan was about to discover that no such creature existed.
[Susan walks into Julie and Zach kissing, whereupon a mother-daughter argument ensues]
Mary Alice Young: There's also a look that parents of the not-so-well-behaved children give to parents like Susan. It says, "Welcome to the club."

[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: Sooner or later, the time comes when we all must become responsible adults, and learn to give up what we want so we can choose to do what is right. Of course, a lifetime of responsibility isn't always easy. And, as the years go on, it's a burden that can become too heavy for some to bear. But, still, we try to do what is best - what is good - not only for ourselves, but for those we love.
[Zach and Julie secretly meet to talk about Susan's forbidding them to see each other]
Mary Alice Young: Yes, sooner or later, we must all become responsible adults. No one knows this better than the young.


"Desperate Housewives: Bang (#3.7)" (2006)
Mary Alice: Sweety, we can't prevent what we can't predict.

Mary Alice Young: [narrating] Lynette Scavo had a dream that night. It was one she had many times before.
Lynette Scavo: Hey! Mary-Alice, are you okay?
Mary Alice Young: Yes, thank you. I'm fine.
Lynette Scavo: Ok! I'll see you later!
Mary Alice Young: [narrating] But this night, something changed.
Lynette Scavo: No, you're not. I can tell. Please, tell me what's wrong. Let me save you.
Mary Alice Young: You can't.
Lynette Scavo: Why not?
Mary Alice Young: Sweety, we can't prevent what we can't predict!
Lynette Scavo: Isn't there anything I could do?
Mary Alice Young: Yes. You can enjoy this beautiful day. We get so few of them.
Mary Alice Young: [narrating] This was the last time Lynette would ever dream of me. And for her sake, I'm grateful.


"Desperate Housewives: Running to Stand Still (#1.6)" (2004)
[first lines]
Mary Alice Young: Suburbia is a battleground, an arena for all forms of domestic combat. Husbands clash with wives, parents cross swords with children, but the bloodiest battles often involve women and their mothers-in-law.

[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: The search for power begins when we're quite young. As children, we're taught that the power of good triumphs over the power of evil. But as we get older, we realize that nothing is ever that simple. Traces of evil always remain.


"Desperate Housewives: Guilty (#1.8)" (2004)
[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: There is a widely read book that tells us everyone is a sinner. Of course, not everyone feels guilt over the bad things they do. In contrast, there are those who assume more than their share of the blame. There are others who soothe their consciences with small acts of kindness... or by telling themselves their sins are justified. Finally, there are the ones who simply vow to do better next time, and pray for forgiveness. Sometimes, their prayers are answered.

[first lines]
Mary Alice Young: [Bree opens the Bible] There is a widely read book that tells us everyone is a sinner. Of course, not everyone who reads this book over the bad things they do, but Bree Van De Kamp did. In fact, Bree had spent most of her life feeling guilty.


"Desperate Housewives: Remember: Part 2 (#2.24)" (2006)
Mary Alice: The trick is to keep moving forward, to let go of the fear and the regret that slow us down and keep us from enjoying a journey that will be over too soon. Yes, there will be unexpected bends in the road, shocking surprises we didn't see coming... but that's really the point, don't you think?

Mary Alice: The trick is to keep moving forward, to let go of the fear and the regret that slow us down and keep us from enjoying a journey that will be over too soon. Yes, there will be unexpected bends in the road, shocking suprises we didn't see coming... but that's really the point, don't you think?


"Desperate Housewives: The Gun Song (#4.16)" (2008)
Mary Alice Young: [Voice over] In names the labels we attach to people tell us everything we need to know.
[as we see Susan paint Maynard's name on his nursery wall as Mike cradles the baby]
Mary Alice Young: If we say she's just a child does this mean she's truly innocent?
[as we see Kayla ride in the back seat]
Mary Alice Young: Does calling her a drug dealer prove she's purely evil?
[as we see Ellie wander the streets coat-less and crying]
Mary Alice Young: Will a man known as preacher always practice what he preaches
[as we see the priest ponder in his study]
Mary Alice Young: Can a man branded a villain possess the qualities of a hero?
[as we see Orson look at a picture of himself and Bree]
Mary Alice Young: The truth is a name can never really tell you who someone is
[as we see Wayne throw water in the face of Adam who is tied to a chair]

Mary Alice Young: Voice over: In names the labels we attach to people tell us everything we need to know.
[as we see Susan paint Maynard's name on his nursery wall as Mike cradles the baby]
Mary Alice Young: If we say she's just a child does this mean she's truly innocent?
[as we see Kayla ride in the back seat]
Mary Alice Young: Does calling her a drug dealer prove she's purely evil?
[as we see Ellie wander the streets coat-less and crying]
Mary Alice Young: Will a man known as preacher always practice what he preaches
[as we see the priest ponder in his study]
Mary Alice Young: Can a man branded a villain possess the qualities of a hero?
[as we see Orson look at a picture of himself and Bree]
Mary Alice Young: The truth is a name can never really tell you who someone is
[as we see Wayne throw water in the face of Adam who is tied to a chair]


"Desperate Housewives: You're Gonna Love Tomorrow (#5.1)" (2008)
Mary Alice Young: [voice-over] It goes by so quickly. In a flash, the life we knew is gone forever and we're left to ask ourselves: How could he have left me? When did my beauty start to fade? Why has my friend changed? Was I the best mother I could have been? Of course, there are some people who understand how quickly time passes. That's why they're so determined to get what they want... before it's too late.

Mary Alice Young: [voice-over] It will happen to all of us eventually. The moment will come when we ask ourselves: Where did the time go? How did the children I once cradled grow up so very quickly? How did the life I dreamt of turn into a career I never expected? And how did that woman I saw each day in the mirror become someone I don't even recognize?


"Desperate Housewives: One Wonderful Day (#1.23)" (2005)
[after killing Deidre, Mary Alice brings a toy chest from upstairs]
Paul Young: What are we going to do?
Mary Alice: You said they were pouring the concrete for the pool to mould.
Paul Young: You can't be serious!
Mary Alice: They'll never find her. We can put her in this.
[points to the toy chest]
Paul Young: She wont fit!
Mary Alice: Then we'll have to make her fit!
[Mary Alice starts checking Diedre's arm]
Paul Young: What are you doing?
Mary Alice: Checking for track marks.

[after killing Diedre, Mary Alice brings a toy chest from upstairs]
Paul Young: What are we going to do?
Mary Alice: You said they were pouring the concrete for the pool to mould.
Paul Young: You cant be serious!
Mary Alice: They'll never find her. We can put her in this.
[points to the toy chest]
Paul Young: She wont fit!
Mary Alice: Then we'll have to make her fit!
[Mary Alice starts checking Diedre's arm]
Paul Young: What are you doing?
Mary Alice: Checking for track marks.


"Desperate Housewives: Every Day a Little Death (#1.12)" (2005)
Mary Alice Young: Death is inevitable. It's a promise made to each of us at birth. But before that promise is kept, we all hope something will happen to us... whether it's the thrill of romance, the joy of raising a family, or the anguish of great loss. We all hope to experience something that make our lives meaningful, but the sad fact is not all lives have meaning. Some people spend their time on this planet just sitting on the sidelines waiting for something to happen to them... before it's too late.

[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: Death is inevitable. It's a promise made to each of us at birth. But before that promise is kept, we all hope something will happen to us... whether it's the thrill of romance, the joy of raising a family, or the anguish of great loss. We all hope to experience something that make our lives meaningful, but the sad fact is not all lives have meaning. Some people spend their time on this planet just sitting on the sidelines waiting for something to happen to them... before it's too late.


"Desperate Housewives: Come Back to Me (#1.10)" (2004)
[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: Trust is a fragile thing. Once earned, it affords us tremendous freedom, but once trust is lost, it can be impossible to recover. Of course, the truth is we never know who we can trust. Those we're closest to can betray us... and total strangers can come to our rescue. In the end, most people to decide to trust only themselves. It really is the simplest way to keep from getting burned.


"Desperate Housewives: Hello, Little Girl (#4.13)" (2008)
Mary Alice Young: Voice over: Lynette Scavo had always trusted her husband. She had no idea that trust was about to go up in flames


"Desperate Housewives: Connect! Connect! (#5.12)" (2009)
Mary Alice Young: [VOICE OVER] At 5:15 Edie called to tell the girls her husband came home. She never got through to anyone though. Gaby didn't pick up because she was watching the girls take their orders. Lynette was out with Stella laughing and sharing stories and enjoying it. Bree was outside showing her future son-in-law color samples for the house and smiling politely when they disagreed. And Susan didn't answer because she was enjoying a cup of tea and what it was like to be alone.


"Desperate Housewives: I Wish I Could Forget You (#2.6)" (2005)
Mary Alice Young: Every little girl dreams of a big, white wedding. But some dreams... just don't come true.


"Desperate Housewives: Women and Death (#8.17)" (2012)
Mary Alice: Yes, as much as death takes from us, it also gives. It teaches us what's truly important. Like giving back after a lifetime of taking... going after something we never should've let go of... or looking back on what made us who we are. But sometimes, the lessons learned after a person's death aren't the ones we expected.


"Desperate Housewives: Who's That Woman? (#1.4)" (2004)
Mary Alice: It suddenly occurred to Lynette her label was about to change yet again. And for the next few years, she would be known as the mother of the boys who painted Tiffany Axelrod blue.


"Desperate Housewives: Listen to the Rain on the Roof (#3.1)" (2006)
Mary Alice: This is what rainy days are good for. They make everything clean again. Especially on a street like Wisteria Lane, where everything can get so messy.


"Desperate Housewives: You'll Never Get Away from Me (#2.3)" (2005)
Mary Alice: [voice-over] Yes, each new day in suburbia brings with it a new set of lies. The worst are the ones we tell ourselves right before we fall asleep. We whisper them in the dark, telling ourselves we're happy, or that he's happy. That we can change, or that he will change his mind. We persuade ourselves that we can live with our sins, or that we can live without him. Yes, each night before we fall asleep we lie to ourselves in a desperate, desperate hope that come morning... it will all be true.


"Desperate Housewives: You Take for Granted (#8.16)" (2012)
Mary Alice: [Narrating] We all take the gift of life for granted, if only we could slow things down because before you knew it, the gift is gone.


"Desperate Housewives: There Won't Be Trumpets (#1.17)" (2005)
[last lines]
Mary Alice Young: We all honor heroes for different reasons - sometimes for their daring, sometimes for their bravery, sometimes for their goodness. But, mostly, we honor heroes because, at one point or another, we all dream of being rescued. Of course, if the right hero doesn't come along, sometimes we just have to rescue ourselves.