Harry Block
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Quotes for
Harry Block (Character)
from Deconstructing Harry (1997)

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Deconstructing Harry (1997)
Harry Block: You're air-conditioned here?
The Devil: Sure! Fucks up the ozone layer.

Harry Block: Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
Doris: You have no values. Your whole life, it's nihilism, it's cynicism, it's sarcasm and your orgasm.
Harry Block: You know in France, I could run on that slogan and win.

Harry Block: You know, I cannot understand why the most sophisticated of women can't tell the difference between a meaningless, hot, passionate sexual affair and a nice, solid, tranquil, routine marriage.
Joan: [breaking down] Tell me, Harry, just tell me something. Was she the only one, or were there others?
Harry Block: No, Amy Pollock was the only one, may God strike me dead if I am lying.
Joan: You're an atheist, Harry!
Harry Block: Wha-hey, we're alone in the universe, you're going to blame that on me, too?
Joan: [angrily tears papers from typewriter] Stop your tap-dancing...

Doris: It's tradition.
Harry Block: Tradition is the illusion of permanence.

Harry Block: Does the president think of fucking every woman he meets? Oh sorry, bad example.

Harry Block: The most important words in the English language are not "I love you" but "It's benign."

Harry Block: Between air conditioning and the Pope, I chose air conditioning.

Harry Block: I'm a guy who can't function well in life but can in art.

Harry Block: Six shrinks later, three wives down the line, and I still can't get my life together.

Harry Block: The two most important things are the work that you choose and sex.

Burt: Do you care even about the holocaust, or do you think it never happened?
Harry Block: Not only do I know that we lost 6 million, but the scary thing is that records are made to be broken

The Devil: You ever fuck a blind girl?
Harry Block: No. That I never did.
The Devil: Oh, they're so grateful.

Harry Block: [to his brother-in-law Bert] I think you're the opposite of a paranoid. I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.

Harry: Cookie, do you know what a black hole is?
Cookie: Sure, that's how I make my livin'!

Cookie: How come you got all this money?
Harry Block: I always keep hooker money around, you know, 'cause I once paid by check years ago and the I.R.S. killed me.

Harry Block: Every hooker I ever speak to tells me that it beats the hell out of waitressing. Waitressing's gotta be the worst fucking job in the world.

Harry Block: All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.

Harry: The ironic thing is that the school that kicked me out is honoring me soon.
Shrink: Why did they kick you out?
Harry: Because I wasn't interested in college. I wanted to be a writer and that's all I cared about. Also, I tried to give the Dean's wife an enema. They didn't take kindly to that.

Harry Block: Look, I was merely explaining to you why my choice of necessity is confined to your practice.

Harry Block: Between air-conditioning and the Pope, I'll take air-conditioning.

Harry Block: [after sex] Cookie, you're a definite artist. They should put your lips in the Smithsonian.

Fay: You love baseball.
Harry Block: Baseball's easy because it has rules. It has foul lines.

Harry Block: Cookie is the nanny.
Doris: The nanny! Where did you get her, from an agency or a massage parlor?
Harry Block: Oh jesus! She's a sweet kid, what are you picking on?
Doris: Ah, still with the sex pots, the tramps, the vilda chayes.
Harry Block: Ah, she's got a PhD, this girl.
Doris: Really? I don't know how she did on her written, but I'm sure she got an A plus on her oral exam.

Harry: [to a suffering damned soul in Hell] What did you do?
Damned Man: I invented aluminum siding.

Harry's Father: I'm a Jew. I don't believe in Heaven.
Harry Block: Where do you want to go?
Harry's Father: A Chinese restaurant.

Harry Block: All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.

Harry Block: Can I be honored and then arrested?

Harry Block: [to his brother-in-law] I don't think you're a paranoid. I think you're the opposite of a paranoid. I think you go around with the insane delusion that everybody likes you!

Harry Block: This guy is too old for her.
Richard: He's younger than you are.
Harry Block: Hey, I'm much too old for her, it's ridiculous. But, because of my immaturity I have a boyish quality that works.

Doris: You're a self-hating jew.
Harry Block: Hey, I may hate myself but not 'cause I'm jewish.

Harry's Sister: You never forgave him because you thought he was a bad father.
Harry Block: He was!
Harry's Sister: Thanks for stopping by...

Lucy: You schmuck, you bastard. I'd like to cut your fuckin' head off.
Harry Block: You're upset, right?

Harry Block: And then, after their child was born, she became what he called "Jewish with a Vengeance".