Maizy Russell
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Quotes for
Maizy Russell (Character)
from Uncle Buck (1989)

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Uncle Buck (1989)
[Miles and Maisey watch Tia make out with her boyfriend]
Miles: That's a pretty stupid thing to do during Flu season!
Maisey Russell: I'll bet she's getting the tongue!

Buck Russell: Do you think she hates me?
Maisy Russell: With a passion.
Buck Russell: Really? Do you think it's the hat?
Maisy Russell: No.
Buck Russell: No? A lot of people hate this hat. It angers a lot of people, just the sight of it. Ah, I'll tell you a story about that on the way to school.

Maisy's Teacher: Does anybody have a special story to tell the class about something that happened this week?
[Maisy raises her hand]
Maisy's Teacher: Maisy?
Maisy Russell: My uncle was micro waving our socks and the dog threw up on the couch for an hour.
Maisy's Teacher: Honest?
Maisy Russell: Mm-Hmm.
Maisy's Teacher: Why was your uncle micro waving your socks?
Maisy Russell: He can't get the goddamn washing machine to work.
Maisy's Teacher: Blasphemer!

Buck: Did you brush your teeth?
Miles: Yeah. You can even feel my toothbrush.
Buck: You know, I have a friend who works at the crime lab at the police station. I could give him your toothbrush and he could run a test on it. To see if you actually brushed your teeth or just ran your toothbrush under the faucet.
[Miles imagines hearing sirens, Buck leaves]
Maisy Russell: If that's true, we're gonna really have to start brushing our teeth.

Maisey Russell: I don't know why we need boys at all. They're so loud.
Miles Russell: [Off screen] Shut up!
Maisey Russell: Shut up, yourself!
Tia Russell: We need boys, so they can grow up, get married, and turn into shadows.

Maisy Russell: They have rent-a-shoes!
Tia: And rent-a-foot disease!

Miles: You always kick me around, I'm an American and I have rights.
Tia: Maisey, do I kick you around?
Maisey Russell: No, but you said 'shit' twice, only once that counts though.

Tia: Let the dog out.
Maisey Russell: Parcey!
[their dog Parcey emerges from the dryer]

Buck: [struggles to pick a hissing, fighting cat up out of the bushes] Come on.
[takes it into the house]
Buck: Hey who left the cat out?
Maisey Russell: We don't have a cat.
Buck: [takes the cat back out] Shoo.

[first lines]
Tia: Get your bag off the table, people eat there.
Maisey Russell: People eat off of plates.
Tia: Don't give me any crap, Maizy.