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Quotes for
George (Character)
from "George of the Jungle" (1967)

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George of the Jungle 2 (2003) (V)
Narrator: Huh? Wait a minute! Who the heck are you?
George: Me new George. Studio too cheap to pay Brendan Fraser.
George Jr: Ha ha ha. Let's go, dad!
[runs off]
Narrator: How did you get the part?
George: New George just lucky, I guess.

Narrator: With Shep down for the count, George felt the need to rally his troops.
George: Don't worry! George not know meaning of defeat! George not know meaning of most words. But especially defeat! And George will stand here just as long as George's name is...
[George gets conked in the head by two coconuts]
George: ...Herb.

Ape: I'm happy to see you too. What are you doing here?
George: George here to help. Tookie say Ape in trouble. Broke. Busted. No Benjamins.
Ape: Broke? It's all a big misunderstanding. I'm perfectly fine. That's why I'm... giving away all my furniture.
George: George happy Ape perfectly fine. Only wish George perfectly fine.
Ape: What's the matter?
George: Ursula think George spend too much time with animals. Animals think George spend too much time with Ursula. George so upset, think about taking off neck crown.

Lyle: I haven't been this disappointed since the sixth grade, when my sister stole my Shaun Cassidy lunchbox.
George: George confused.
Lyle: Shaun Cassidy was a popular TV character in the late 70s, along with Parker Stevenson. I followed both their careers, actually.
George: George not confused about Shaun Cassidy, George confused about unhypnotizing.

George: George realize that in order to save tree house, Bukuvu, and entire jungle lifestyle, George now have to hit women. But, in name of sportsmanship, George give woman fighting chance.
[Kowalski kicks him in the crotch]
George: Note to George. Rethink sportsmanship.

George: Sorry George late, but George had important royal duty to tend to.
Ursula: In other words, you were playing coconut ball.
George: And George score winning goal. Maybe sometime Ursula come out and try for cheerleader.
Ursula: I tried once, but the gorillas turned me down because I wasn't pretty enough.
[George kisses Ursula]
George: You look pretty to me.
Ursula: Well, maybe you should tell that to the gorillas.
George: George promise - tonight, spend whole night with Ursula. Okay?
Ursula: Okay.

Ape: George, I should've told you earlier, but I have some gambling debts that I have to pay off for a little while.
George: How little?
Ape: Seventeen years.
George: George think maybe that might be too late.

George: Can George give Junior vine swinging lesson before we eat?
George Jr: Vine swinging's a little dangerous
George: [looks at Ursula] Must be from your side of family
George Jr: Vine surfing is much cooler.
George: What dangerous about swinging? Swinging fun. George show you.
Ursula: Honey, maybe that's not such a good idea.
George: Why? It easy.

Narrator: Meanwhile, back in the jungle, George was taking care of some serious jungle business.
Ursula: George, the sink's stuffed again!
Narrator: Well, kind of serious.
George: Don't worry. George fix.
[they go in front of each other, but George moves her to side]
George: Ok.
[searches sink]
George: Ah.
[continues searching and finds problem]
George: Huh.
[pulls snake]
George: Hey, come here.
[George pulls on snake, but it is stuck in sink. He strains and finally pulls the whole sink out]
Ursula: Oh!
[looks up at George scoldingly]
Ursula: [George smiles sheepishly]
Ursula: [trips on plate] Woah!
Tookie: Aak aak eek eek Tookie Tookie! Aak aak eek eek Tookie Tookie!
Ursula: George, you better answer the bird.

George: If George come home early, would Ursula still go out with George?
[Ursula smiles and nods]
George: George: Good.
[turns and head hits hanging ornament]

George: George lucky man. He's got Ursula, and Junior...
[coconut falls on George's head]
George: ...and really strong head.
Ursula: Honey, I wouldn't worry about Junior swinging. He's the son of the greatest swinger of all time. How could he not learn how to swing?
George: That make George happy.

George: George so sorry George late. But zug zug treaty broke down and George had to step in.
[sniffs and wipes poop off foot]
George Jr: P.U.

George: George also make present.
George Jr: Cool. Thanks, dad.
George Jr: Woah, cool! A spear!

Narrator: Feeling dazed and confused, or more dazed and confused than normal, George sought professional help.
George: [Tookie language] Meekee kyukkya.
Tookie: Aah... Tookie Tookie!
[talking in unintelligible Tookie language and Tookie bangs head against pole]
Tookie: [angry] Aak aak eek eek Tookie Tookie!
George: [abruptly stops] George know Tookie trying, but need talk to brother Ape. Maybe Tookie fly to get brother ape?
[pulls postcard from loincloth]
George: Aak aak eek eek Tookie Tookie?
Tookie: Nu-uh.
George: [sighs] Then George just talk more.
Tookie: [flies out] Aak! Tookie Tookie!

[George wiping sink with asparagus]
Ursula: Honey? What's the matter
George: What?
[Sits on asparagus]
George: AAH!

Narrator: Anxious to see his bankrubt bretheren Ape, but not wanting to stand out like a simian from the sticks, George made a stop.
George: New George look pretty good in armani too.

Narrator: Ferklempt at finally finding each other again, George and his brother Ape had a big, emotional reunion.
George: Hi.
Ape: Hello.
Narrator: Oh, come on, you can do better than that.
[George and Ape hug and roll around on floor, hooting and laughing]

Ape: Get her a nice present to help scratch it.
[switch scenes]
Ursula: A backscratcher.
George: To help with itch.

Ape: George, this is Rocky. He's very honored to meet you.
Ursula: Why do they call him Rocky?
[bell dings and Rocky punches George's face]
Ape: Because when he gets nervous, he does that.
George: [in between blows] George... honored... to... meet... Rocky... too.

[Beatrice's phone rings]
Beatrice: Hello? Hello?
George: [holding phone wrong way] Hello?
Beatrice: Turn the phone around, you idiot.

Narrator: So, with his devoted son and dormant wife, George headed back to his homeland. After getting a tip from Brendan Fraser, who was cramped during the first picture, this time he made sure to get a bigger crate.
George Jr: Dad? I'm afraid. What're we gonna do about mom?
George: [sighs] George not know. But Ursula not recognize George even before George level her. What Ape think?
Ape: Either we should check the crate for pods, or she's in some sort of hypnotic trance. She doesn't know who you are.

[Tookie bumps George under hammock, who pops up with net on head]
George: Eh? Tookie!
Tookie: [exhausted] Aah aah eee eee Tookie Tookie.
George: Ape can't come talk to George cause broke? In big trouble? George must go Vegas to help!

Narrator: Unaware of the threat both home and abroad, George and his extended jungle family took off on their first trip.
George Jr: Look, look!
George: Ooh. Las Vegas.

Ape: I understand your concern, and if I return... uh, when I return, I will coordinate your schedule to the satisfaction of everyone. It's just a question of balance.
George: George good at balance. See?
[stands on one foot and trips over man carrying big box]

George: George still worried about Ursula. She's lonely and she worried she not cook or clean as well as Ape.
Ape: Well, she might have a point there

Ape: [while surrounded on roof] I'm sorry, old chum. We did everything we could.
[George looks around and sees rope ladder dropping from airplane]
George: Aah! George have idea.
Ape: [moans]

Ursula: I can't help feeling that something's missing. That somewhere, out there, something's waiting for me.
[George swings in and Ursula falls off bed]
George: Sorry to surprise Ursula, but George can't take living without Ursula. George madly in love.
Ursula: Look, I don't know who you are, but I'm married. Unfortunately.
George: Right. George Ursula's husband.
George: Ursula more confused than George. But no time to talk, Bukuvu in trouble. Must get back. George put Ursula first, then jungle, hmm?
Ursula: Listen, I've never heard of the Bukuvu and Lyle's my husband. Thought I have to admit you are quite attractive, and have these sinewy arms of a god! But I'm one of those old-fashioned types and I take my marriage vows very seriously.
Betsy: Then can I have him?
George: Sorry. George love Ursula more than anything in the world. Ursula mean everything to George.

Betsy: Do you have any brothers at home?
[George turns and knocks Ursula out]
George: Have brother Ape.
Betsy: Ooh, an ape.

Narrator: See if you can spot our discreet product placement.
[Shep is wearing sneakers]
George: That's my Shep. Yes, that's my Shep.
Ursula: Oh, the elephant's wearing New Balance.

Ape: I tell you George, it's good to be home.
George: Maybe Tookie wrong, and Mean Lion not king. Jungle not look different.
Narrator: Not different? Look at the signs, George! The signs! But George missed the signs, signs even an illiterate warthog would have noticed.

Narrator: And they would've had their big, bonecrushing fight for the kingdom, had it not been for the secret trick Ape taught him when they were kids.
George Jr: The ear, George!
[George pulls lion's ear and lion falls]
George Jr: Woah, cool.
Ape: There, see?
George: [sighs] George wish life always this easy.

George: Who's with George?
Tiger: Why should we follow you, you care more about your family than us.
George: Sure George care about family. Even half of family sleeping through best part of movie.
[Ursula snores]
George: But you've always been George's brothers and sisters, don't you remember?
[motions to monkey]
George: We took first steps together.
[motions to buffalo]
George: And you taught me how to swim.
[motions to ape]
George: And you were with me first time we read Playape magazine.

George: Okay. George try something completely different. We few. We happy few. We band of brothers. For he today who sheds his fur with George shall be George's brother. And other animals in the jungle shall think themselves acursed they were not here. And when we get old, ye will remember with great pride what feats ye did today. Land all we have, George king, and king ask animals to join him and save homeland!

Narrator: George still had one more official duty.
[kisses Tiffany]
Tiffany: George!
Narrator: Helping Ursula bring her friends out of their hypnotic trance.
[kisses Courtney]
Courtney: Ooh, George.
[kisses Betsy]
George: Eee!
[Betsy pulls him close]
Betsy: [while kissing] But I still don't recognize him. Stan? Stan? Is that you? Hey, Stan?

George: George not hit women, so appreciate it if women not hit George.
[Sally smiles and punches his face, then punches him again, where he is dangling over the side of the bulldozer, and his head keeps coming in contact with over 20 trees]

Lyle: [over phone to Beatrice, about deed] Turns out your idiot son-in-law has it. But where does he keep it.
Beatrice: I'll ask him.
[to George]
Beatrice: George?
George: Hmm?
Beatrice: Where do you keep the deed to Ape Mountain?
George: George hide in buttflap.
[walks into vine and trips]
Beatrice: Enchanting.
[to Lyle]
Beatrice: He keeps it in his underwear.
Lyle: Now, the only question is how do we get him and his underwear back here, so I can take it?

George of the Jungle (1997)
Max: Let's take care of him.
George: Huh?
[Max and Thor pick George up and ram head into cage]
Ape: Why didn't you come sooner?
George: Why Ape have little stars around head?
[Max and Thor pull George out, tickles him, and rams head back in]
Ape: George, remember everything I told you about Queensbury rules and fighting fair?
George: Uh-huh.
Ape: Well, now's a good time to forget it.

George: To swing or not to swing?
Man: Help!
George: Swing.

Narrator: Later, in the Men's Department, after discovering his long lost brothers, the jungle king was pleased to find he looked pretty good in Armani.
George: Pretty darn good.

George: Dog eat dog? Dog eat dog here?
Ursula Stanhope: No, that's not what I meant.
George: George never bringing Shep here. Uh uh. Never.

[swinging a lion over his head while protecting Ursula]
George: George not even trying hard.

Ursula Stanhope: So I'll tell my dad first thing in the morning.
Betsy: Make that second thing. First thing, I suggest you buy jungle man some clothes.
[George is wearing a dress]
George: Nice butt flap.

George: So you no want Ursula to love George?
Ursula's mother: I'd rather have my tongue nailed to this table every morning at breakfast.
George: That hurt.
Ursula's mother: Not as much as you will if you do anything to screw up my daughter's marriage to Lyle van de Groot.

George: Sometime George smash into tree. And sometime...
[George screams and falls out of treehouse]
George: Sometime George fall out of treehouse. But not feel stupid.

[Ursula laughs]
George: No people here to look stupid for. Just George.

[looks down Ursula's shirt]
George: Something funny about this fella.

Ape: George, what on earth are you doing?
[George is wearing flower lei]
George: George just feel like looking a little special today. That all

Ursula Stanhope: And you can watch TV, and eat, and relax, and I'll be back as soon as I can. Just stay here.
Narrator: Stay here? George is king of the jungle. No four walls built by modern man can contain him
George: Not true. George have every intention of doing exactly what Ursula say.
Narrator: Really? Is that so?
George: For a while.

Ursula Stanhope: [going crazy] Why wouldn't an ape read textbooks and why wouldn't I find myself in a treehouse with room service and a Tarzan wannabe wearing a... What do you call that thing?
George: Buttflap.

Narrator: Well, Ursula's fiancè is in prison, and there's a jungle man sleeping on her balcony. She could use a best friend right now.
Betsy: Hi.
Ursula Stanhope: Hi.
Betsy: I got here as fast as I could. Where is he?
Ursula Stanhope: Oh, he's in the waterf... he's in the shower.
Betsy: Not anymore.
Ursula Stanhope: Oh! George.
[sees him naked]
George: Bad waterfall. First water get hot, then George slip on this strange yellow rock.
[sees Betsy]
George: Oh. Hi, George of Jungle.
Betsy: Charmed, I'm sure.
Ursula Stanhope: George, hold this big book.
[he holds book covering his front part]
Ursula Stanhope: Cover the booty.
[puts bowl on behind]
Ursula Stanhope: Let's get you some clothes. Sorry, Betsy.
George: Bye.
Betsy: No problem.
[to herself]
Betsy: Now I can see why they made him king of the jungle.

Ursula Stanhope: And this is Neiman Marcus
George: Ooh! They have big shiny cave.

Lyle: [to Max about George] Could you see if he's dangerous?
George: [whiny voice] Here, boy. Where's my little doggy?
Max: I've got a feeling he's not.

Lyle: White ape. Sounds like a drink
Lyle: Yes, bartender, I'll have two black russians and a white ape.
Narrator: A drink the venal Van de Groot would be begging to imbibe, if he only knew how close the white ape was at that very moment. Flying through the foliage, surveying the scenery, and swinging on through the trees with effortless ease.
George: [hits tree] Ow!

George: That close one, huh?
Ursula Stanhope: Watch out for that tree!
[George looks up and Ursula's head hits branch, knocking her out]
George: Oops.

Narrator: The ape named ape was caged in a cage, hoping to hear the jungle king's awesome...
[jungle call]
Narrator: Hey, I'm pretty good at that. And wondering if he would ever come. But the motion-sick mammal needn't have moaned, for that defender of the innocent, protector of the weak, and all around good guy George of the Jungle was closer than he knew.
[noises come from crate and it opens with George in it]
George: Next time George get bigger box.

George: [on Ursula's apartment balcony] This very high treehouse.
Ursula Stanhope: Mmm-hmm.
George: Good place to call friends from, sound carry.
Ursula Stanhope: Oh, no...
[George lets out jungle call]
Ursula Stanhope: ...the neighbors.

[Ursula screams at the sight of Ape]
George: No, no! It's all right! Ape friend! Ape make your breakfast!
Ursula Stanhope: [panicky] What does it want? What does it want?
Ape: "It" wants "its" Physician's Desk Reference, if you don't mind. Unless you'd rather die of dengue fever, of course.
Ursula Stanhope: [laughing hysterically] That is very funny!
Ape: [sarcastic] Ha, ha, ha...
Ursula Stanhope: I thought I heard the monkey talk!

George: Sleep sweet, Ursula.
Ursula Stanhope: Sleep sweet, George.

George: Here comes shep.

George: It dancin' time. Ursula wanna dance?

George: George not feel so good.

[after Lyle comes to take Ursla away]
George: Now George really mad! George tear off your...
[after this, Geroge gets caught by the German army men]
Mercenary: At ease, jungle boy. Everybody freeze now!
German Army Man: Operation completed as ordered, sir.
Lyle: Thank you, Gunner, Gunter, Hans, Jan... and Phil.
Entire Group: Thank you, sir!
Lyle: No hard feelings, stone belly. The best man won that's all. Or I should say the guy who brought mercenaries on. That's all.

"George of the Jungle: Star Power/L'il Orphan Anteater (#1.8)" (2007)
Ursula: Your precious anteater tricked us into taking baby medicine!
George: Little Shep would never do such a thing!
Magnolia: It's true George, he's *evil*!
George: [sticking his fingers in his nose] George can't hear you! George can't hear you! Also... can't smell you.
Ape: George, take your fingers out of your nose and listen!

"George of the Jungle: Aromageddon/Found Temple of Gold (#1.2)" (2007)
George: The smells are going away - George solved whole problem!
Ursula: But you created the problem!
George: Ah! But, George *solved* the problem! What's George's big reward? huh? huh? huh?

"George of the Jungle" (1967)
George: Look! White man set up camp in jungle!
Ape Named Ape: [deep sigh] Well, there goes the neighborhood!