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: [hearing a man reading "Casey at the Bat"
] What a fag!
: [Buttermaker falls down drunk
] Is he dead? Prem Lahiri
: No, he is drunk. Tanner Boyle
: Screw this, man, I'm takin' his wallet.
: Great. First we have to play ball with a girl? What next? A cripple? Matthew Hooper
: Hey! Tanner Boyle
: Oops, I forgot!
: Hey bears, thanks for batting practice. Jimmy
: Yeah, you guys suck. Tanner Boyle
: I'll show you batting practice.
: I heard he puts money under your bed at night when you lose a tooth. Tanner Boyle
: That's the tooth fairy, you homo!
: Gotta protect the family jewels. Tanner Boyle
: Who are you kidding. When's the last time you even saw them?
: My dad says the only people who put ketchup on hot dogs are mental patients, and Texans.
: Hey, cut it out, poop-face! Tanner Boyle
: Poop-face? Are you kidding me? Elmo flips better shit than you!
: Hey Yankees, you can take your crappy trophy's and shove them right up your asses! Tanner Boyle
: Nice. See you next year bitches!
: Come on guys, remember what I told you, there's no "I" in team Matthew Hooper
: Yea, but there's an "M" and an "E". Tanner Boyle
: THERE SHOULD BE AN "F" AND A "U"!
: [after Timothy has been jumped by two members of the Yankees
] No one's ever stood up for me before. Tanner Boyle
: Maybe if you weren't such a spaz all the time, I wouldn't have to!
: All we got on this team are a buncha Jews, spics, niggers, pansies, and a booger-eatin' moron! Ogilvie
: Tanner, I think you need to be reminded from time to time that you are one of the few people on this team who is not a Jew, spic, nigger, pansy or booger-eating moron. So you'd better cool it or we may be disposed to beat the crap out of you.
: Hey Yankees... you can take your apology and your trophy and shove 'em straight up your ass!
: Jews, spics, niggers, and now a girl? Amanda Whurlitzer
: Grab a bat, punk!
Coach Morris Buttermaker
: [after team takes vote to quit the league
] Do you want to quit, Tanner? Tanner Boyle
: Crud, No! I want to play ball!
: We lost eighteen to nothin', Buttercrud, and the Athletics are the worst team in the league! Ahmad Abdul Rahim
: *Second* worst... Tanner Boyle
: Sorry, I forgot.
: [Buttermaker passes out drunk during practise
] Opening day's tomorrow! We don't know what the batting order is. We don't even have our positions set or anything. Tanner Boyle
: All we got is a cruddy alky for a manager!
: [after getting cold shoulder from everyone
] Hey does anyone mind if I warm up too? Tanner Boyle
: We didn't think you needed anybody but yourself to play catch with! Kelly
: Just cool it, runt.
[they start fighting
: Those Yankees are real turds.
: You're all a buncha handbags!
: Jews, Spics, Niggers and a Wop that throws airballs.
: Hey Buttercrud! Something's wrong with the cruddy showers! The cruddy water ain't coming out of the cruddy faucets! Morris Buttermaker
: Do you have to use that word all the time? Tanner Boyle
: You got another word for water?
[Engelberg is getting weighed
] Tanner Boyle
: Shouldn't we take him out to the truck scale? Mike Engelberg
: Is that a fat joke? Morris Buttermaker
: No, it's a truck joke.