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: Hey - Watch it! Frank Berkman
: Suck my dick, ass man...
: [Waiting to be taken away in an ambulance after having a heart attack
] Degolas. Joan Berkman
: What? Bernard Berkman
: It means "bitch." Don't you remember? Joan Berkman
: You're calling me a bitch? Bernard Berkman
: No, don't you remember the last line of Godard's "A Bout De Souffle"? Belmondo calls Seberg a bitch. "Degolas." We saw it at the Thalia with the Dicksteins. I got you in for the children's price. You were pregnant with Walt. Joan Berkman
: Like six weeks. Bernard Berkman
: I still got you in for a children's ticket. You told me you didn't like Godard. You thought the jump-cuts were -
[He is loaded into the ambulance
] Bernard Berkman
: I'd check for the cat behind the ashcans, under the Golodners' stoop! Joan Berkman
: You're early. Bernard Berkman
: Hi, Joan. Joan Berkman
: Don't feed him the generic stuff. Bernard Berkman
: What? Joan Berkman
: Frank says you're feeding the cat generic food. Get Purina, it's what he likes. Bernard Berkman
: It's the same damn thing, Joan. Joan Berkman
: OK. It's not, but... Bernard Berkman
: He's my cat, too. Remember when he got stuck in the wall in New Hampshire and I rescued him? I know how to handle him. Joan Berkman
: It was a radiator. Bernard Berkman
: What? Joan Berkman
: He got stuck in a radiator. You trimmed your beard. Bernard Berkman
: Yeah, it was starting to get a little feral. You look well. Joan Berkman
: Yeah? Thanks. Bernard Berkman
: Things are good here. Teaching is going well. And I'm playing the best tennis of my life. Maybe that's an illusion, but... it feels that way.
: I'd appreciate it if you didn't... tell him about things like Richard. Bernard Berkman
: My father told me you called him. Joan Berkman
: I did, yeah. Bernard Berkman
: He said you, uh... he said you were upset. Joan Berkman
: Yeah. I wanted to... I like him. You know that. I just wanted to say - I don't know. I just wanted to say hello. Bernard Berkman
: He called me right after. He said, "Bernie, I think you can save your marriage." I told him... I didn't think there was anything else I could do. I did try everything.
] Joan Berkman
: Bye, Bernard.
: You married? Ivan
: Nope. Bernard Berkman
: The whole thing's very complicated.
: Mom's dating Ivan. Bernard Berkman
: Really? Ivan, back there, Ivan? Frank Berkman
: Yeah. Bernard Berkman
: Are you sure? Why didn't you say something? Why is your mother dating all these jocks? Very uninteresting men. Frank Berkman
: Ivan is very interesting. Bernard Berkman
: Ivan's not a serious possibility for your mother. Frank Berkman
: I think he is. Bernard Berkman
: I don't want to badmouth Ivan. But I don't know what Joan is thinking. Frank Berkman
: I think Ivan... Bernard Berkman
: You're living with a twenty-year-old. Bernard Berkman
: It's none of your business, Joan. Joan Berkman
: It's my business when you have our kids! It's confusing for them. Frank says Walt's in love with her. Bernard Berkman
: Walt has a girlfriend. Fuck off, Joan. I don't ask about you and Ivan. Stay out of my life. I can't believe you'd talk to me like this. You left all those fucking ticket stubs and letters lying around! You wanted me to know. It was fucking torture, Joan! FUCKING TORTURE!
: Joan, let me ask you something. All that work I did at the end of our marriage, making dinners, cleaning up, being more attentive. It never was going to make a difference, was it? You were leaving no matter what... Joan Berkman
: You never made a dinner. Bernard Berkman
: I made burgers that time you had pneumonia.
: She's a very risky writer, Lili. Very racy. I mean, exhibiting her cunt in that fashion is very racy. I mean Lili has her influences in post modern literature, it's a bit derivative of Kafka, but for a student, very racy. Did you get that it was her cunt?
: How do you know they were both Frank's? Ms. Lemon
: Well, I suppose it's possible other kids are masturbating and spreading their semen around the school as well... It's possible, but, uh, somewhat unlikely. Bernard Berkman
: Oh, it happens, I'm sure, much more than we know. Joan Berkman
: Bernard, have you ever done anything like this? Bernard Berkman
: I'm not going to answer that.
: Put me in your mouth.
: Don't be difficult
: You'll have to share the bathroom with the boys. They get the upstairs and I have my own. Lili
: That's all right, as long as Walt remembers to pull the seat down.
: [they kiss
] Why did you stop? Bernard Berkman
: I'm your teacher. Lili
: You know, I've always wondered what it'd be like to fuck you.
: Your mum and I, we're going to separate. I've got you tuesday, wednesday and every other thursday. Walt Berkman
: And what about the cat? Joan Berkman
: The cat! Bernard Berkman
: We didn't discuss the cat.
: Ivan is fine but he's not a serious guy, he's a philistine. Frank Berkman
: What's a philistine? Bernard Berkman
: It's a guy who doesn't care about books and interesting films and things. Bernard Berkman
: Your mother's brother Ned is also a philistine. Frank Berkman
: Then I'm a philistine. Bernard Berkman
: No, you're interested in books and things.
: What is it about high school, you read all the worst books by good writers.