Dave Richards
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Quotes for
Dave Richards (Character)
from "Cheers" (1982)

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"Cheers: Old Flames (#2.7)" (1983)
Dave Richards: You cannot give old leopards new stripes.

Cliff Clavin: What's the matter, Norm?
Norm Peterson: Uh, oh, nothing. Just that my shorts are binding up on me.
Cliff Clavin: Just stand up and straighten them out.
Norm Peterson: Nah. I'll give 'em five minutes. Sometimes they self-correct.
Diane Chambers: The level of conversation in this bar could not sink any lower.
[Dave Richards walks into the bar]
Dave Richards: [to Diane] Hiya wonderbuns.
Diane Chambers: "Going down"!

Norm Peterson: Hey Dave, Dave. What was that you said at the end of your sports report last night?
Dave Richards: Oh, I said uh, "Good night and remember: the world is full of winners and loser. Here's hoping you're one of them."
Norm Peterson: Well, I guess I did hear it right.


"Cheers: 'I' on Sports (#6.2)" (1987)
Dave Richards: [trying to convince Sam to fill in as sportscaster] Come on Sam, you'd be great. You talk good like me and you're handsome.

Dave Richards: [to Rebecca after first laying eyes on her] I make an unGodly amount of money and I know exactly how to use it.
Rebecca Howe: You must be a friend of Mr. Malone's.
Dave Richards: Well, you know what they say, the good looking ones travel in pairs. And, uh, that certainly is true in your case.
Rebecca Howe: Do you have the time?
Dave Richards: 4:30.
Rebecca Howe: Good, because I just wanted to remember the exact moment I met the biggest jerk on Earth.
[Sam laughs at Dave]
Dave Richards: [to Sam] Tough woman, tough woman.
Sam Malone: You got that right. I wear a cup to work.


"Cheers: Sam at Eleven (#1.4)" (1982)
Dave Richards: Well, well, what do we have here? Hi! Dave Richards. I'm an old team-mate of Sam's.
[Dave shakes Diane's hand]
Diane Chambers: Oh. Diane Chambers. I'm Sam's new waitress.
Dave Richards: Sam have his brand on you yet?
Diane Chambers: Hardly.
Dave Richards: Oh, well, good, then you're in for a lucky day. Not only am I incredibly good looking, I'm also incredibly rich and incredibly nice.
Sam Malone: And incredibly married.
Diane Chambers: Well, I am sorry to hear that.
Dave Richards: You are?
Diane Chambers: Yes. I was hoping to reject you based solely on your personality.