Nick Tortelli
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Quotes for
Nick Tortelli (Character)
from "Cheers" (1982)

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"Cheers: Loathe and Marriage (#11.15)" (1993)
Nick Tortelli: I have an opportunity to purchase an orangutan act.
Dr. Frasier Crane: [to Cliff, under his breath] Did he say purchase or join?


"The Tortellis: The Ad Game (#1.5)" (1987)
Nick Tortelli: What is the most disgusting thing I can eat in my next commercial?
Annie Tortelli: Ribs.
Nick Tortelli: Ribs? What's so disgusting about me eating ribs?
Annie Tortelli: Obviously you've never seen yourself eat them.


"Cheers: Save the Last Dance for Me (#4.20)" (1986)
Nick Tortelli: Hello, Sweetcakes. You been thinking about me?
Diane Chambers: Only during flea and tick season.


"Cheers: Spellbound (#5.15)" (1987)
Nick Tortelli: [to Diane] Say the word, Blondie, and we can happen.
Diane Chambers: [Derisively] I'd rather be the love toy of a Greek army battalion.
Nick Tortelli: Who wouldn't? But dreaming gets you nowhere.