Fuller Thomas
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Quotes for
Fuller Thomas (Character)
from Joy Ride (2001)

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Joy Ride (2001)
Fuller Thomas: Do a woman's voice.

Fuller Thomas: Do you ever miss Mom and Dad?
Lewis Thomas: Yeah, I miss Mom's chocolate chip cookies, playing football with Dad on Sundays, going to... Oh wait, that somebody else's childhood. What I meant was, "No."

Ice Truck Driver: Do you guys need help back to the main road?
Fuller Thomas: No, we're okay, now that we're not murdered or anything.

[about the car]
Venna: Have you guys named it yet?
Fuller Thomas: Not yet, but we were thinking about "Tad or Lewis's Shitty Newport".

Fuller Thomas: I have never felt like more of a pussy in my entire life.

[after installing the CB]
Fuller Thomas: This is like some kinda prehistoric Internet.

Fuller Thomas: Stay the fuck back, man. I've got a gun!
Ice Truck Driver: And I've got a MasterCard.

Venna: How afraid should I be?
Fuller Thomas: More than usual.

[Over the CB radio]
Rusty Nail: You know, Black Sheep, you really oughtta get that fixed.
Fuller Thomas: Get what fixed?
Rusty Nail: Your tail light.

Rusty Nail: Apologize.
Fuller Thomas: No. Listen, you sick fuck, you pathetic, lonely, walkie-talkie, freak show motherfucker. You're not getting anything from me. Know why? Because I have something that's more powerful then your psychosis. It's called a volume knob, and the only thing I have to do to make you go away is to turn it counterclockwise. You got that? You copy that?
Rusty Nail: You know, Black Sheep, you really ought to get that fixed.
Fuller Thomas: Get what fixed?
Rusty Nail: Your taillight.

[after Lewis intentionally runs off the road]
Fuller Thomas: So, do you need me to drive, er, you good?

Marine: [talking into the CB radio] Howdy, you got Black Sheep here with Mama's Boy. Who we got? over.
Fuller Thomas: Can I please get a better handle than Mama's Boy?
Marine: No.

Fuller Thomas: All right, no cops 'til Jamestown. Free to speed like a mother fucker for like the next 40 miles or so.

Fuller Thomas: [Fuller and Lewis are driving] You know, with the exception of the seat spring piercing my ass, this ride's excellent.

Fuller Thomas: Do what I do. Just remind yourself that in a hundred years you're gonna be dead. It's the closest thing I've got to a philosophy.

Fuller Thomas: Come on, I know what Dad says about me behind my back. That I'm the world's biggest loser. And that's coming from a plumber! That's coming from a man who wears a lime green jumpsuit to work everyday!

Lewis Thomas: You should call home every once in a while. You know, when you don't need bail money?
Fuller Thomas: Yeah, but how often is that?

Fuller Thomas: Hey, you came all the way to Salt Lake for me?
Lewis Thomas: Well, you are technically still my brother.

Local in Nebraska Bar: [to Lewis] I said, is this your bitch? Cause if it is your bitch, you better shut your bitch up.
Fuller Thomas: [running towards them] Bitch, are you mouthing off again? I'm sorry man, it's just so hard to keep them in line now'a'days.

Officer Akins: So you have no idea who might have visited Mr. Ellinghouse's room last night?
Fuller Thomas: No, sir. I wish - I wish we could be more helpful, but I...
Lewis Thomas: Is he dead?
Officer Akins: Coma. You know what I'm thinkin'? I'm thinkin' that a little look-see might "refreshify" your memory.
Fuller Thomas: Takin' a look-see at what?
Officer Akins: [Visiting Hospital Heart Monitor Beeping, Ventilator Pumping] Ripped his jaw... clean off.