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Quotes for
Monique Jefferies (Character)
from "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" (1999)

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"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Entitled (#1.15)" (2000)
Det. John Munch: Vanity, my name is woman.
Detective Monique Jefferies: It's frailty, not vanity, you misogynist.

Detective Monique Jefferies: He was shot with a Black Talon?
Det. John Munch: Cop killers. They haven't been made since 1994.
Detective Monique Jefferies: Yeah, because they killed too many cops.
Det. John Munch: Nah, the real reason was, it was instantly recognizable. Bullet makers want anonymity. If you can't prove where the bullet was made, you can't sue the manufacturer. Where would we be without lawyers?

Det. John Munch: [yelling] You're enjoying this, these little guys trying to sweet-talk you into giving us a little crumb of information.
Arthur Pruitt: Oh yeah, yeah, it's the high point of my life.
Det. John Munch: Better than shooting those people in cold blood, you little reptilian geek?
Arthur Pruitt: Oh, it's bad cops now?
Det. John Munch: [yelling] You bet your ass.
Detective Monique Jefferies: John, easy.
Det. John Munch: [still in a loud tone] You did it, you piece of crap. I know it, you know it.
Det. John Munch, Detective Monique Jefferies: Seriously, come on.
Det. John Munch: No, I'm going to kill this guy myself.
Arthur Pruitt: [to Jeffries] Call him off, call him off.
Det. John Munch: I'm gonna Mike Tyson you, you bastard!
Arthur Pruitt: Come on. Is this legal?
Detective Monique Jefferies: Probably not.
Det. John Munch: [whispering] I'm gonna kill you, I'm gonna kill you, I'm gonna kill you.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Payback (#1.1)" (1999)
Detective Monique Jefferies: Doesn't sound like there's much doubt on the C.O.D.
Detective John Munch: Do you think that you're conclusional pole vaults are personality or gender-driven?
Detective Monique Jefferies: I don't know, John. What about deductively logical?
Detective John Munch: Oh really? I had what looked like a stabbing once in Baltimore, it turns out some guy was getting divorced and drank drain cleaner and his soon-to-be-unmarried widow discovered him dead-no alimony. She stabbed him 15 times out of pique.

Detective Monique Jefferies: Hey, you guys going to eat all this?
Detective John Munch: Suppose we say 'yes'?
Detective Monique Jefferies: Suppose I'm just being polite?
Detective John Munch: Oh, that would be a first...
Detective Brian Cassidy: That's cool, John doesn't eat vegetables.
Detective Monique Jefferies: Yeah? The way I heard, that's the only thing John never gets to uh... eat.
Detective Brian Cassidy: Ouch.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Hysteria (#1.4)" (1999)
Capt. Donald Cragen: Well, while you wait take her photo around, see if you can find a co-worker who knew her, all right. Munch, Cassidy! You available?
John Munch: To do with as you will, after court.
Capt. Donald Cragen: Oh, right, Doctor Buzzjoy.
Det. Monique Jefferies: Oh, that's an open and shut case, Munch, try not to screw it up with your insane rambling.
[She walks away, Munch continues to stare at her]
Det. Monique Jefferies: And stop looking at my ass.

Det. Monique Jefferies: So you're saying *all* women are whores?
Det. John Munch: Don't be ridiculous. I don't know *all* the women in the world.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Uncivilized (#1.7)" (1999)
Detective Monique Jefferies: Who lets an eight year old out alone?
John Munch: You watch over them twenty-four hours a day, you wind up with safe little neurotics.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Disrobed (#1.13)" (2000)
Det. Monique Jefferies: Wow, 4.7 million in one year.
Det. Brian Cassidy: That's pretty good for a fledgling charity.
Det. Olivia Benson: Fledgling - I'm impressed.
Det. Brian Cassidy: Yeah, that's right, I'm a real dope, aren't I? You know what I did last night? I looked it up and I memorized it just so I can impress you.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Stocks & Bondage (#1.9)" (1999)
Det. Brian Cassidy: I don't get S&M. I mean, hurt me, it turns me on. Come on, what's up with that?
Det. John Munch: It starts with the tattoos. Once you get the ink, it's just a matter of time before you're begging to be tied up and spanked.
Det. Brian Cassidy: Yeah, tattoos are just a gateway to the sexual dark side, my friend.
Det. Elliot Stabler: [putting his right arm around Cassidy and turning his left arm so one tattoo shows] You guys have finally figured me out, huh?
Det. Monique Jefferies: Seriously, did you get off on the tiny little pinpricks of pain?
Det. Elliot Stabler: No, I get that from workin' with you.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Misleader (#1.17)" (2000)
Det. John Munch: Round 2 we go bad cop on his ass, right Jeffries?
Det. Monique Jefferies: Cool.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Wrong Is Right (#2.1)" (2000)
[last lines]
Det. Monique Jefferies: Monique Jefferies, maybe I can help.
Det. Odafin 'Fin' Tutuola: Fin Tutuola, I've been reassigned.
Det. Monique Jefferies: You're here for my job.
Det. Odafin 'Fin' Tutuola: Oh, this is awkward.
Det. Monique Jefferies: Well, try my side of the moment.


"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Wanderlust (#1.5)" (1999)
Det. Monique Jefferies: Is there anything you just accept?
Det. John Munch: Yes. Compliments.
Det. Monique Jefferies: Oh, no wonder you're so skeptical.