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Quotes for
Jamie Ross (Character)
from "Law & Order" (1990)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"Law & Order: Ritual (#8.10)" (1997)
Mr. Tobak: [upon seeing his car on the back of a tow truck] You have heard of diplomatic immunity?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You have it. Your car doesn't. We can have it towed, and towed... and towed.

Mr. Tobak: [sees his car being towed] What is this?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Mr. Tobak, did you know that you owe $36,000 in parking fees?

D.A. Adam Schiff: Hold your heads up. You looked a 3000 year old abomination in the eye and hit it back.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Because we heard of it.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: How many more don't we know about?

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: O'Hara would award custody to Medea.

Mrs. Martin Sr.: What gives you the right to tell us how to live?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: What gives you the right to break the law?

Nari Martin: I have to be supervised to visit my own daughter?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Until everybody's happy that she's safe around you.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [Dr. Nasser lied about being a cardiologist] Mr. Tobak finally came through. Dr. Nasser's résumé. Turns out he's an OB/GYN.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: That's a few organs south of cardiology.


"Law & Order: I.D. (#7.2)" (1996)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I think we'll convince Judge Marks...
Jack McCoy: Nathan Marks?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Luck of the draw.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Make sure your airbags are working.

Judge Nathan Marks: [commenting on Ross's clothing] Lovely blouse. Rare to see single-ply silk with that texture. Must feel very nice. Italian weave.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Chinese.
Judge Nathan Marks: Ah, they're improving.

Judge Nathan Marks: Miss Ross, when you leave a man's apartment at 8 o'clock in the morning, did you just drop in for a coffee and a sweet roll?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Am I a defense witness, judge?
Judge Nathan Marks: You're an officer of the court, aiding in our search for the truth. You sample a man's hospitality once. Are you likely to return to sample it again soon?
Jack McCoy: Your Honor, this is not appropriate.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: If I left at 8 am, I wasn't too impressed. I don't think I'd be rushing back.
Judge Nathan Marks: Can't argue with that.

Jack McCoy: I thought he was going to ask your favorite sexual positions next.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I grew up with four brothers. Marks is an amateur.
Jack McCoy: You don't mind that kind of thing?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Would you rather he'd ruled against us?
Jack McCoy: Guess I'll have to unlearn some of my sensitivity training. If we have another hearing, you'll model silk for him again?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Trust me, he would have been just as big a fan of rayon.

Judge Nathan Marks: [after Ross arrives late in court] Ah Miss Ross, how nice of you to join us. I gather you stayed later than 8 am this morning. Was the gentleman more... impressive today?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Your honor, I've been very busy.
Judge Nathan Marks: What I'm suggesting.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: On a matter of business for this court.
Judge Nathan Marks: Oh, and I thought our business was here. Whatever kind of romp you've been up to...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...is relevant to this case, if you'd stop focusing on my sex life.
Judge Nathan Marks: You're in contempt. I want a check for 200 dollars.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [shouting] If you try to fine me!
Jack McCoy: [aside to Ross] Not now.
[pause]
Jack McCoy: Approach, your honor?
Judge Nathan Marks: If she brings her checkbook.
Jack McCoy: [aside to Ross] Pretend he's your brother.

D.A. Adam Schiff: You know who's who now?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Yes.
D.A. Adam Schiff: This is Joanne Sullivan you've got there in Rikers?
Jack McCoy: Who else could it be?
D.A. Adam Schiff: Please don't ask.


"Law & Order: Burned (#8.9)" (1997)
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Adam, why are we pussyfooting around?
D.A. Adam Schiff: [referring to Anderton] The man has a 4 billion dollar war chest. Three years ago, the Atlantic Star Cable merger, he took on the SEC and won.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [sarcastically] He's rich; he's powerful; maybe we should let Robin Leach try the case?

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It would help if we could tell the jury what turned Terry into an arsonist.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: He was angry at his father. That's an emotion I can understand.

Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: [looking at a photo of Terry Lawlor in his school yearbook] Looks pretty harmless in a jacket and tie.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You all do!

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Your grandson needs psychiatric help.
Carl Anderton: Absolutely not.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: I don't understand you, Mr. Anderton. We're offering him...
Carl Anderton: What? The chance to stay in a loony bin till some state employee decides he can leave?
[pause]
Carl Anderton: You know, I know what this is really all about, Mr McCoy.
[pause]
Carl Anderton: You're going after my grandson to embarrass me.
[McCoy shakes his head]
Carl Anderton: Yes! Personally, professionally, publicly.
[Walks right up to McCoy]
Carl Anderton: I know your type. You think that to bring down a man who's accomplished something in life it builds you up. You're not going to get away with it. I put a fair offer on the table. You turn it down, I'll go public and I'll expose you for the vindictive, envious little man you really are.
[McCoy stares at Anderton in astonishment]

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [referring to Carl Anderton] Last year he made a surprise takeover bid for Commonwealth Airlines. One week later, he withdrew the bid, and accused the FAA and the stockholders of conspiring against him. It's classic manic-depressive behavior.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Doesn't make sense. Runs a Fortune 500 company.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: So did Howard Hughes.


"Law & Order: Showtime (#7.17)" (1997)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after Curtis has had an altercation with McCoy outside the courtroom] What was that about?
Jack McCoy: He's just a little upset his wife's about to find out he had an affair on the evening news.
Detective Lennie Briscoe: [to Curtis] I'm told you you should have gone to bed with her. You're getting the grief, you should have had the gravy!

Neil Gorton: I don't know which I'm going to enjoy more: seeing Newman go free, or seeing you lose.
[to barman]
Neil Gorton: Two vodka martinis.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Is it all about me?
Neil Gorton: You know I'm over that.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Of course! I've seen your new associate.
Neil Gorton: Harvard Law Review...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: And a round butt, just the way you like them!

Jack McCoy: [discussing media coverage of the case, in Schiff's office] How things look to some general audience is not relevant in the courtroom.
Adam Schiff: Oh, will you wake him up, Miss Ross? We're approaching the 21st century. It matters, Jack! When are you going to buy a new tie?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [cut to Ross and McCoy approaching the courthouse] You can't just turn off all the cameras and the microphones.
Jack McCoy: What's next? Timeouts for commercials? We go into court with soft drink logos on our backs?

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [barging in on Gorton's defense conference] You son of a bitch!
Neil Gorton: I take it you got my notice.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [rips up child custody notice and flings it on table] Yes. Here it is!
Neil Gorton: Not a legally persuasive argument, counselor. We have a custody arrangement; you're in breach.


"Law & Order: Passion (#7.21)" (1997)
Professor Charles Evans: [Referring to his affair with the victim] It wasn't grand passion, just wine at lunch, you know?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I don't drink at lunch.
Professor Charles Evans: And I don't kiss and tell.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [Referring to Posner and Evans] What do you think she wanted to say to him?
Jack McCoy: "Thanks for ruining my life."
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: "Please take me back!"

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [leaving the courtroom after the verdict has been read] What do you think she was gonna say to him?
Jack McCoy: [confidently] "Thank you for ruining my life."
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [smiling knowingly] "Please take me back".
[McCoy's eyes widen in disbelief; fade to black]


"Law & Order: Survivor (#7.4)" (1996)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Mrs Schoenberg, did you ever call a man named Richard Peterson about the coins?
Ann Schoenberg: No.
[grimaces]
Ann Schoenberg: If they were at my feet, I wouldn't bend down to pick them up.

D.A. Adam Schiff: And our Swiss banker friends...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...who stole the coins in the first place.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Yeah. What refugees are they taking deposits from now, as they yodel their way to the bank?


"Law & Order: Past Imperfect (#7.22)" (1997)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after McCoy has made a deal with Silverman] All this time I thought it was defense attorneys who were sleazy.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Turns out Sonja Harlann was Lancer's kid. She gets her 50 million dollars.
Jack McCoy: [sheepishly] Good for her.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: And Silverman collects his 17 million dollar fee. No wonder everybody hates the legal profession.
Jack McCoy: [pause] Make sure Douglas Burke gets a full transcript of Sonja Harland's allocution. This way there'll be something to collect when he sues her and Mr Silverman for his mother's wrongful death.
D.A. Adam Schiff: [wryly] Lawyers!
[sighs]
D.A. Adam Schiff: [fade to closing titles]


"Law & Order: Divorce (#8.16)" (1998)
[last lines]
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Redfield agreed to full restitution of the missing assets, and he gets off with having his license pulled for three years. He'll probably count this as a win.
Jack McCoy: He can drive up to Bedford and crow to Atkins about it.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Where on earth did these people learn their ethics?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Law school.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Of course.

D.A. Adam Schiff: [Hands a letter to McCoy] Addressed to me, belongs to you.
Jack McCoy: From the Bar Association Ethics Committee.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Dues check bounced?


"Law & Order: D-Girl (#7.15)" (1997)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Grant's lawyer wants to meet as soon as possible. He might be looking for a plea.
Detective Lennie Briscoe: Oh, that's too bad. I was hoping this time Grant might escape to the Bahamas.

Neil Gorton: Nice coat!
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Thanks! You paid for it!


"Law & Order: Barter (#7.12)" (1997)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You knew all along Tashjian killed Kaiser, didn't you?
[pause]
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Don't worry: I'm not going to run to the Ethics Committee.
Jack McCoy: I didn't know with absolute certainty. One way or another, I had to get Tashjian on the stand.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Well, hats off!
Jack McCoy: Sometimes you have to make deals with the devil.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Just as long as you don't get your eyebrows singed.
Jack McCoy: Anyway, Tashjian owed somebody half a million dollars. I'm sure they'll be around to collect it one of these days.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: And as for the Ethics Committee, you owe me one!
[Ross leaves. McCoy snickers. Cut to intertitle: "Sam 'Bunny' Russo is currently serving a sentence of life without parole. Three months after testifying against Russo, Steven Tashjian was gunned down outside his office. The killers remain at large. His assets, including his co-op, were liquidated to settle his debts". Cut to closing credits]

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Who would you ask if you needed a hitman?
Detective Rey Curtis: [jokingly referring to Briscoe] I'd find an old cop, preferably one with a lot of alimony.


"Law & Order: Deadbeat (#7.7)" (1996)
Jack McCoy: We already got the father.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [Referring to Arlene Webber] But she's guilty too.
Jack McCoy: We put her in jail, her son dies alone.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Everybody's got a sad story.
Jack McCoy: It won't be an easy case to make. Webber's dead. Her father won't talk.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: We can look for other evidence.
Jack McCoy: You feel burned?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You feel sorry for her?
Jack McCoy: Call me a sentimental fool.
[long pause]
Jack McCoy: There's no statute of limitations on murder.
[picks up file on the case]
Jack McCoy: We'll keep it. Right on top of the pile.
[cut to closing credits]

Max Schaeffer: They think I killed Mike.
Leon Storch: They do? You didn't, did you?
Max Schaeffer: No.
Leon Storch: Well then just tell them the truth! I never saw anybody get hurt by the truth!
Lt. Anita Van Buren: [watching through the mirror] This man says he's an attorney?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Suspects are entitled to a lawyer, not a good lawyer.


"Law & Order: Causa Mortis (#7.1)" (1996)
ADA Jamie Ross: I believe in monsters and things that go bump in the night, Jack. May they rot in hell, along with their attorneys.

Chuck Rodman: [angrily, after McCoy and Ross have refused to cede jurisdiction to the Feds] So, what am I, the dog or the pony?
ADA Jamie Ross: I don't know what you're talking about.
Chuck Rodman: I blew off a staff meeting to come here for this. Now, I came here in good faith and I expected to leave with a capital case.
ADA Jamie Ross: I never promised you anything.
Chuck Rodman: Persona non grata, Jamie. Your calls don't get returned.
[storms out]
ADA Jamie Ross: [winks at McCoy] He'll get over it.


"Law & Order: Double Blind (#7.6)" (1996)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Freedom of the press isn't free, Mr Bailey, but turning over your mailing list won't cost you a cent.
Gerald Bailey: I can't believe this: it's extortion.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It's leverage.


"Law & Order: Harvest (#8.4)" (1997)
Jack McCoy: Jamie, do dead people feel pain?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Is that a trick question, Jack? The word 'dead' says it all.


"Law & Order: Baby, It's You (#8.6)" (1997)
Jack McCoy: [turning off a news report about the murder] These anonymous sources, the wouldn't be wearing blue, would they?
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Those leaks did not come out of my squad.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: They got the M.E.'s report before we did.
Jack McCoy: I want these leaks stopped, Lieutenant.
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Do you want me to compile an enemies list while I'm at it?
Jack McCoy: I don't see anything funny here.
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Well, a case this big, we're going to get leaks. We might as well get used to it.
Jack McCoy: No, that's not good enough. By the time we present this case to a jury, the details will be clues in the Daily News Sunday crossword.
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Which could be the whole point of leaking the information in the first place. The Janaways know people who know people in the department.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: The Janaways are the anonymous source?
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Why not? If they got a heads-up that this investigation's about to turn back on them, these leaks could just be preemptive.
Jack McCoy: Have your people talked to Mrs. Janaway about her husband and her daughter?
Lt. Anita Van Buren: They're going to try today.
Jack McCoy: Good. This time, let's try to stay one step ahead of the media.


"Law & Order: Denial (#8.2)" (1997)
[last lines]
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Baby's dead, and no one's responsible.
D.A. Adam Schiff: No one was responsible when it was alive, either.
Jack McCoy: Warren Talbert's still in jail. We could get him for obstruction of justice, destruction of evidence.
D.A. Adam Schiff: [wearily] We got beat. Just send him home to his family.


"Law & Order: Turnaround (#7.16)" (1997)
Neil Gorton: I wish you were working on my side of the aisle on this one. We were good together.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...in court. Everywhere else, we stunk.
Neil Gorton: [suggestively] Oh, how quickly they forget!
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [laughing] All right, there too.


"Law & Order: Castoff (#8.13)" (1998)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Mr. Chandler.
Eddie Chandler: Eddie, as in Eddie Munster.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You don't seem to be taking this serious at all.


"Law & Order: Legacy (#7.10)" (1997)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Almost a record! They convicted him in an hour and a half.
D.A. Adam Schiff: How's the Wife doing?
Jack McCoy: Shaky but she served him with Divorce Papers on his way out of the Court Room.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Gotta be tough finding out you married your stalker.


"Law & Order: Family Business (#7.8)" (1996)
Jack McCoy: We screwed up, we're not supposed to screw up.
Jamie Ross: You act like this is the first case you lost.
Jack McCoy: It's not, doesn't mean I have to like it. A murderer goes unpunished, it's bad for business.
Jamie Ross: Laura Bergreen's not the first rich person to get away with murder... and she won't be the last.


"Law & Order: Under the Influence (#8.11)" (1998)
Jack McCoy: Kills three people and hides behind the bottle.
Jamie Ross: The law says he can.
Jack McCoy: The law. Probably written on a cocktail napkin. Intent follows the bullet. It shouldn't matter if it was fired by a drunk or Carrie Nation.


"Law & Order: Damaged (#8.22)" (1998)
Dr. Emil Skoda: [discussing the alleged rape of a mentally handicapped teenager] She's a sweet girl with an IQ of 65. And the school thinks exposing her to ridicule from normal kids somehow does her good.
Jack McCoy: She understand what she did?
Dr. Emil Skoda: Not in any meaningful way. She'd do whatever it takes to please whoever she was with.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Would that be obvious to another teenager?
Dr. Emil Skoda: That'd be crystal clear to anyone who talked to her for two minutes.
Jack McCoy: Those boys are gonna claim the last thing they did in that music room was talk.


"Law & Order: Shadow (#8.8)" (1997)
A.D.A. Charlie Harmon: It went too far; I am sorry about that. Try to understand, Jamie.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It's not in the job description.


"Law & Order: Thrill (#8.1)" (1997)
Jamie Ross: Killers are protected by the church, the law says two people can fire the same bullet and now the victim's mom forgives the murderer. You figure it out.
Jack McCoy: You don't think you could?
Jamie Ross: Forgive him? No.
Jack McCoy: Neither could I. What does that say about us?


"Law & Order: Nullification (#8.5)" (1997)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after the jury is hung and a mistrial is called] If he only knew. You could've sunk this trial and you didn't. You played it straight, Jack. That rates as a moral victory.
Jack McCoy: It could be a hollow one, if those clowns could find even one person who'd acquit them. What does that tell you about this country?


"Law & Order: Matrimony (#7.13)" (1997)
Kim Triandos: We could both get jobs, Mama.
Velma Darcy: You wanna dance naked in Wichita Falls? You want me to dance naked too? The Dancin' Naked Idiot Family?
Jamie Ross: [listening in a van] These family talks are SO heartwarming.
Detective Lennie Briscoe: Yeah, I just hope nobody chucks the vase with the microphone in it.


"Law & Order: Corruption (#7.5)" (1996)
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after asking lawyer to divulge a privileged secret] I'd definitely owe you one.
Gary Gaviola: As a D.A., or the best-looking women to ever set foot in this office?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: As a D.A.
Gary Gaviola: [pause] What's the question again?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Did Spence admit stealing evidence against Hector Garcia from the property room at the 116?
Gary Gaviola: I'm gonna get up and open the door for you. If I don't fall and break my arm on the way over there, then you can assume my deceased client confessed to the crime in question.