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Quotes for
Toshiro Takashi (Character)
from Revenge of the Nerds (1984)

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Revenge of the Nerds IV: Nerds in Love (1994) (TV)
Lewis Skolnick: Harold where're you going?
Lamar: I don't know but I'd guess over to Lois.
Takashi: Are you scoing, Harold?
Harold: Well I wouldn't tell you if I was. But I'll guarantee you this much, I ain't going over there for breakfast!

Betty Skolnick: Hey. What's Trevor Gulf doing?
Jeanie Humphrey: [startled] I-I think he's mooning us.
Lewis Skolnick: That's no moon, thats the San Joquin valley
[shouts, running at Trevor as people began to react off-screen]
Lewis Skolnick: TREVOR, NO!
Takashi: [takes photo of Trevor's mooning] Oh! Big Smile!

Takashi: The bishop has a kidney stone, he no make it to wedding!
Dudley Dawson: How am I supposed to get married without a clergyman?
Mr. Skolnick: I could marry you.
Dudley Dawson: But I don't love you.

Takashi: Smile pretty, smile pretty.
[Takashi takes a photo with his camera]
Takashi: Thank you.
Lamar: Name tags, name tags anyone?
Takashi: [offscreen] Right there, right there, a picture.
Lamar: Excuse me, would you like a "Hello, my name is" tag?
Romeo: How nerdy can you get?

Takashi: Hey everybody, everybody! Booger's parents are here! Mr. and Mrs. Booger, Mr. and Mrs. Booger!
[applause]
Dudley Dawson: Mom? Dad!
Chip: They look like they just fell off a pickle truck.
Gaylord: [slaps Chip] Chip!
Chip: Ow!
Dudley Dawson: Folks, everybody, excuse me, these are my parents.
Everybody: Oh!
Betty Skolnick: We're so glad that you're here, Mr. and Mrs. Dawson.
[applause]
Dudley Dawson: I am flabbergasted. We would both like to thank all of you from the bottom of our hearts for this... wonderful shower you're throwing us.
Lewis Skolnick: It's probably the first shower he's ever had.
[guffaws]
Mr. Dawson: No, he showered regularly: every other night in the summer, and weekly in the winter.
[more guffaws]
Dudley Dawson: Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm ready to jump off the dock!
Ogre: Yeah!
[applause]

Lewis Skolnick: Okay, all right, anybody who feels that Booger could have had an illegitimate child in Sandusky, Ohio, raise your right hands.
[Most of the Tri-Lambdas raise their hands at first, followed by Ogre and Betty]
Lewis Skolnick: Opposed?
Betty Skolnick: You don't think it's possible?
Lewis Skolnick: No, I do not; Booger may be Booger, but he always took precautions.
Lamar: That is right, he always did wear condoms.
Takashi: Ohh, condoms!
Lamar: Mm-hmm.
Trevor Gulf: So, he couldn't have a child.
Lewis Skolnick: No way.

Takashi: Oh, I made it!
Ogre: Great shot, Takashi you owe me another 20 bucks.
Takashi: Huh?
Ogre: Well, sometimes when you win, you lose. Now let's play for your watch.
Takashi: Okay, thank you
Ogre: You're welcome.

Takashi: Oh boy, that was one heck of a stag party last night, Lewis.
Mr. Dawson: I know I'll never forget it.
Trevor Gulf: I especially enjoyed your dance with the woman who removed her clothes, Mr. Booger.
Lewis Skolnick: Trevor, there's a code of silence about what goes on at a stag party.
Trevor Gulf: Code of silence?
Lewis Skolnick: So reveal nothing, even if you're under hours of interrogation and torture.
Ogre: Wild horses couldn't drag it out of me.
[chuckles]
Ogre: Uh, who aren't I supposed to tell?

Lewis Skolnick: [Mr. Skolnick's car pulls into the driveway] Dad!
Dudley Dawson: U.N.!
Mr. Skolnick: [Mr. Skolnick and U.N. get out of the car] Hey, how are you?
U. N. Jefferson: [Lewis hugs his dad, U.N. shakes hands with Booger] Congratulations, Booger, congratulations!
Dudley Dawson: Thank you.
U. N. Jefferson: I wouldn't miss a nerd wedding for the world.
U. N. Jefferson: [greets Lewis, Mr. Skolnick greets Booger] How are you?
Mr. Skolnick: How's my unborn grandson?
Lewis Skolnick: You mean your unborn fetal son?
[Lewis and his dad guffaw together]
Takashi: Emergency! Excuse please, the bishop has a kidney stone, he no make it to wedding!
Dudley Dawson: What? How am I supposed to get married without a clergyman?
Mr. Skolnick: I can marry you.
Dudley Dawson: But I don't love you.
Mr. Skolnick: Oh- No, no, I took a correspondence course, I'm a fully ordained Tilhoonian minister.
U. N. Jefferson: You are?
Mr. Skolnick: U.N.
[Takashi, Booger, Lewis and his dad all guffaw together, while U.N. Jefferson stands quietly surprised, not getting the pun]


Revenge of the Nerds (1984)
Takashi: Excuse please, but why do they call you "booger"?
Booger: [picking his nose] I don't know.

[Booger is teaching Takashi poker]
Takashi: I think I've got a frush.
Booger: What the fuck's a frush?
Takashi: [showing his royal flush] A *frush*.
Booger: [showing his cards] Oh, well I've got two sevens and two sevens beats a frush.
Takashi: Oh, thank you.

Takashi: Maybe we could have robster craws.
Booger: [adjusting his shirt] What the fuck are robster craws?

[Booger and Takeshi are trying to look at a naked girl who hides behind a large roommate]
Booger: Step aside momma, I wanna see some of that muff!
Takashi: Oh Hair pie! Hair pie!

Lewis: Didn't I tell you we would find a nice place?
Gibert: Yes, this is way better than the dorm.
[Brick is hurled through the window]
Booger: What was that?
Gibert: It says: "Nerds get out!"
Takashi: What is a nerd?
Gibert: *We* are.