Miss Yvonne
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Quotes for
Miss Yvonne (Character)
from "Pee-wee's Playhouse" (1986)

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"Pee-wee's Playhouse: Let's Play Office (#4.9)" (1989)
[Pee-wee and Miss Yvonne are playing office, with Pee-wee as boss and Yvonne as secretary]
Pee-wee Herman: Take a letter.
Miss Yvonne: Yes, sir.
Pee-wee Herman: Dear Mr. Jones... Uh, uh, read it back to me.
Miss Yvonne: "Dear Mr. Jones..."
Pee-wee Herman: Oh yeah. Dear Mr. Jones: How are you? How is your business? My business is fine. Please write back soon. Your friend... Uh, no, make it "Sincerely yours"... No, make it, uh... "Yours truly..." No, make it, uh... "Very truly yours..." No, make it, uh, "Your pal, truly and sincerely, Pee-wee - best regards - Herman. P.S., give my best to your family." No, make it, uh, "Give my regards to your family." No, make it, uh... "Please remember me to your family."

Christmas at Pee Wee's Playhouse (1988) (TV)
Ms. Yvonne: Aren't you going to comment on my hair?
Pee-wee: Wow! Christmasy! But what's the plant growin' out of it?
Ms. Yvonne: It's mistletoe! You're always supposed to kiss somebody if they're standing underneath the mistletoe! This way, I'm assured hundreds and hundreds of kisses from everyone!
Pterri: Stand over here.
Chairry: Stand over here!
The Fish: Come over here and give us a big, wet kiss!
Ms. Yvonne: Oh, don't worry. There's enough of me for everybody!

The Pee Wee Herman Show (1981) (TV)
[Miss Yvonne notices Pee Wee looking depressed and he explains why]
Pee Wee Herman: Once upon a time, there was this boy, and he knew this beautiful woman. It's not you, though. Well, the beautiful woman tells this boy that she has this secret wish, and her wish is that she wants this guy to really like her. So, anyway, the boy makes this huge, personal sacrifice and he gives his wish away.
Miss Yvonne: To the beautiful woman?
Pee Wee Herman: That's right.
[He leaps up from his seat, clearly agitated]
Pee Wee Herman: It's not like the boy expects like he's gonna get anything in return or anything, but... but then he doesn't *get* anything in return; nothing happens! Nothing happens at all! Zip, zero, zilch, they're ain't nothing, no advancements, no nothing! It just doesn't seem fair. It's not like the boy doesn't have a wish of his own. Now I'm never gonna get to...
[He realizes his mistake]
Pee Wee Herman: I mean, now the *boy* is never gonna get to fly... I gotta go be myself, Miss Yvonne.
[He hurries out the door]
Miss Yvonne: No, Pee Wee, stay here with me!
Pee Wee Herman: [crying] No! No!
Miss Yvonne: Oh, poor Pee Wee. Just call me Miss Bungle.

"Pee-wee's Playhouse: Pee-wee Catches a Cold (#2.4)" (1987)
Pee-wee: Stories never make me sleepy.
Miss Yvonne: Once upon a time...
Pee-wee: [Immediately falls asleep]

"Pee-wee's Playhouse: Fire in the Playhouse (#4.2)" (1989)
Fireman Frank: [to the other firefighters] Okay, that's it, fellas. See you back in the station.
[to the cast]
Fireman Frank: Hello, I am Fireman Frank.
Miss Yvonne: Hi.
Fireman Frank: Are all you folks alright?
Everybody: Yes.
Fireman Frank: Fortunately, there wasn't a fire, just a lot of smoke. But smoke can be just as dangerous. And here's what must have started it.
[shows off the homemade bread, blackened and burnt]
Miss Yvonne: Oh, no, my bread!
Fireman Frank: Too bad. I love homemade bread.
Miss Yvonne: I'll put the recipe on a card, with my phone number.
Pee-wee Herman: I don't get it, Fireman Frank. What could've made the bread burn like that?
Fireman Frank: Pee-wee, just about anything will burn at 700 degrees.
Miss Yvonne: Seven hundred? But I set the temperature myself at 350! Didn't I, Pee-wee?
Pee-wee Herman: Yeah.
Fireman Frank: Somebody must have turned it up.
Randy: [appearing beside them] So, is that bread ready yet?
Pee-wee Herman: No, Randy, the bread is burned because SOMEBODY turned the temperature WAY UP on the oven! Got any ideas on who might've done something STUPID like that?
Randy: [sheepishly] Uh... me?
Pee-wee Herman: Randy, you know you're not supposed to touch the oven.
Randy: I do now. Gee, I'm sorry about the bread, Pee-wee. I'll go down to the bakery and get you another one.
[everyone screams, as "one" is the secret word]
Pee-wee Herman: Randy, I don't care about the bread, I care about the safety of everybody in the playhouse.