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Quotes for
Cliff McCormack (Character)
from "Veronica Mars" (2004)

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"Veronica Mars: The Rapes of Graff (#2.16)" (2006)
Keith: [Keith walks into a hotel room and Cliff is handcuffed to the headboard of a bed] So, can I ask you a question?
Cliff McCormack: She said her name was Daphne...
Keith: Oh, no no. How did you call me?
Cliff McCormack: Acrobatically. I might have pulled a hamstring...

Cliff McCormack: [to Lamb, after seeing him with Madison] I'd vote for you.

Keith: Is that what the kids call motor-boatin'?
Cliff McCormack: I have a healthy zest for life. So sue me.


"Veronica Mars: The Quick and the Wed (#2.15)" (2006)
Cliff McCormack: [to Logan] I've asked around and, I hope this isn't news to you, but no one likes you.


"Veronica Mars: Pilot (#1.1)" (2004)
Cliff McCormack: I heard your dad's out tracking down bail jumpers half the time and yet somehow all the cases that come in here still get handled. How is that?
Veronica Mars: We're efficient.


"Veronica Mars: Postgame Mortem (#3.13)" (2007)
Keith Mars: It's as bad as she says? Lamb's going after the kid?
Cliff McCormack: Well, he was thinking very hard about it. Or he really had to pee. It's hard to tell with that man.


"Veronica Mars: Mars, Bars (#3.14)" (2007)
Keith: [Veronica is in jail] Please tell me you didn't help an accused murderer escape jail.
Veronica: Yo Pops, check it out. This girl ain't gonna be nobody's bitch. You better recognize.
Keith: [re: a fake tattoo] What's that on your arm?
Veronica: I've had some free time. And, no, I didn't help Josh escape - not intentionally. Turns out he's allergic to peanuts. His plan was to take advantage of my kindness.
Keith: That's gotta be the first time that's worked for anybody.
Veronica: [Cliff McCormack walks in] Clifford, something wrong?
Cliff McCormack: I've just remembered I need to return "Caged Heat" to the video store. You folks wanna hear the good news or the bad news first?
Keith: I'm gonna say the good news.
Cliff McCormack: Josh's cellmate and key witness to the Cookie Incident ate the evidence and, icing on the cake, blew a .21 on the breathalizer when they booked him. No way Lamb can get a conviction and he knows it.
Keith: That sounds like great news.
Cliff McCormack: But, he's gonna hold Veronica as long as he possibly can.
Keith: Can I get you anything, honey?
Veronica: Uh, couple cartons of smokes.
[Keith gives her a look]
Veronica: What, Dad, it's currency on the inside.
Keith: Any guess where I might find Josh?
Veronica: Mexico?
Keith: So you think he did it?
Veronica: I don't know. If he didn't, he sure panicked quickly.
Keith: That's what I thought too.
Cliff McCormack: Anyone wanna know what I think?
[silence]
Cliff McCormack: Fine, I'll keep it to myself. I'm just saying, my entire day is spent going through my clients' lives. This kid, he's on the up and up.
Keith: Okay, I've got an appointment with Dean O'Dell's old assistant. I can't just put his murder case on hold.
[gives Veronica a look]
Veronica: What?
Keith: Just, I thought this sight would be more traumatic for me, but...
[shrugs]


"Veronica Mars: Rat Saw God (#2.6)" (2005)
Aaron Echolls: Come on, Logan, let me help you. Let me call some guys down at the firm...
Logan: They gave me a lawyer.
Aaron Echolls: A real lawyer. Not some public servant with a mail-order diploma and a three hundred dollar suit.
Cliff McCormack: Two for five hundred, actually, but your point remains valid.