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Quotes for
Local Officer Smy (Character)
from Super Troopers (2001)

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Super Troopers (2001)
Officer Smy: [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd take you down a peg or two.
[to Foster]
Officer Smy: Hey douche bag.
Foster: [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd massage your feet 'til you fell asleep.
Ursula: Nice try.

Police Chief Grady: I will have the enchilada platter with two tacos and no guacamoles. Smy?
Officer Smy: Yeah, chief. I'll have a CHINCHILLA!
Rabbit: I don't get it. Tacos?
Thorny: They think I'm Mexican.
Rabbit: You're not Mexican?

[a man appears to be having sex with a bear in the woods]
Officer Smy: Bear... bearfucker, do you need assistance?

Officer Smy: Ursula, what the fuck? There's no TP in the bathroom!
Ursula: What about the piece stuck to your shoe?
Officer Smy: What ABOUT the piece stuck to my shoe?
[Looks down]
Officer Smy: SHIT!
Ursula: [Stifles a laugh]
Officer Smy: You know, you might get ahead around here if you made the extra effort.
Ursula: Oh why... did you want me to wipe your ass?
Officer Smy: [Flustered] That's not what I meant!
[With a pompous gesture]
Officer Smy: Well around MY house, my wife knows to refill the TP.
Ursula: I'm not your wife, Smy.
Officer Smy: No, and if you were, I'd take you down a peg or two.
Ursula: Oooooooh.