Martha Brewster
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Quotes for
Martha Brewster (Character)
from Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)

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Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)
Mortimer Brewster: Look, you can't do things like that! Now, I don't know how I can explain this to you. But, it's not only against the law, its wrong!
Martha Brewster: Oh, piffle!
Mortimer Brewster: It's not a nice thing to do. People wouldn't understand. He wouldn't understand. What I mean is... Well... This is developing into a very bad habit!

Reverend Harper: Have you ever tried to persuade him that he wasn't Teddy Roosevelt?
Abby Brewster: Oh, no.
Martha Brewster: Oh, he's so happy being Teddy Roosevelt.
Abby Brewster: Oh... Do you remember, Martha, once, a long time ago, we thought if he'd be George Washington, it might be a change for him, and we suggested it.
Martha Brewster: And do you know what happened? He just stayed under his bed for days and wouldn't be anybody.

Martha Brewster: [to Mortimer] One of our gentlemen found time to say "How delicious"!

[after finding the dead body in the window seat]
Mortimer Brewster: But - what happened to him?
Martha Brewster: [cheerfully] He died.

Aunt Martha: For a gallon of elderberry wine, I take one teaspoon full of arsenic, then add half a teaspoon full of strychnine, and then just a pinch of cyanide.
Mortimer Brewster: Hmm. Should have quite a kick.

Jonathan Brewster: We're moving the car behind the house. You'd better get to bed.
Martha Brewster: The car is alright where it is until morning.
Jonathan Brewster: I don't want to leave it in the street. That might be against the law.

Mortimer Brewster: Look, Aunt Martha, men don't just get into window seats and die!
Abby Brewster: We know, dear. He died first.
Mortimer Brewster: Wait a minute! Stop all this. Now, look, darling, how did he die?
Abby Brewster: Oh, Mortimer, don't be so inquisitive. The gentleman died because he drank some wine with poison in it.
Mortimer Brewster: How did the poison get in the wine?
Martha Brewster: Well, we put it in wine, because it's less noticeable. When it's in tea, it has a distinct odor.
Mortimer Brewster: You mean, you... You put it in the wine!
Abby Brewster: Yes. And I put Mr. Hoskins in the window seat, because Reverend Harper was coming.
Mortimer Brewster: Now, look at me, darling. You mean, you mean you knew what you'd done and you didn't want the Reverend Harper to see the body?
Abby Brewster: Well, not at tea. That wouldn't have been very nice.
Mortimer Brewster: Oh, it's first-degree.
Abby Brewster: Now, Mortimer, you know all about it and just forget about it. I do think that Aunt Martha and I have the right to our own little secrets.

Mortimer Brewster: But there's a body in the window seat!
Aunt Abby: Yes, dear, we know.
Mortimer Brewster: You know?
Martha Brewster: Of course!
Aunt Abby: Yes, but it has nothing to do with Teddy. Now, Mortimer, you just forget about it. Forget you ever saw the gentleman.
Mortimer Brewster: Forget?
Aunt Abby: We never dreamed you'd peek.
Mortimer Brewster: What the...?

Mortimer Brewster: What is this? Did everybody in Brooklyn know I was going to get married except me?
Martha Brewster: We knew you'd find out about it in time.

Mortimer Brewster: Now look, darling, how did he die?
Abby Brewster: Oh, Mortimer, don't be so inquisitive. The gentleman died because he drank some wine with poison in it.
Mortimer Brewster: Well, how did the poison get in the wine?
Martha Brewster: Well, we put in wine because it's less noticeable. When it's in tea it has a distinct odor.

Martha Brewster: [about the men they have poisoned] Let me see, now. This is eleven, isn't it, Abby?
Abby Brewster: Oh, no, dear. This makes twelve.
Martha Brewster: Abby, dear. I think you're wrong. This one is only eleven.
Abby Brewster: No, dear, because I remember when Mr. Hoskins first came in, it occurred to me that he'd make just an even dozen.
Martha Brewster: But, Abby, dear. I really don't think you should count the first one.
Abby Brewster: Oh, I was counting the first one, and that makes it twelve.
Martha Brewster: It does? Well, she's probably right. Abby usually is. I get them mixed up sometimes.
Mortimer Brewster: Makes it twelve? Twelve.

Martha Brewster: Are you leaving, Doctor?
Dr. Einstein: Yes, please.

Martha Brewster: [Mortimer is about to leave, but has Mr. Witherspoon's hat on] Hmm! Hmm!
Mortimer Brewster: What, hmm hmm?
Martha Brewster: The hat!
Mortimer Brewster: [Notices hat and throws it on the ground] Argh!
[slams door]