Hawk Hawkins
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Quotes for
Hawk Hawkins (Character)
from Space Cowboys (2000)

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Space Cowboys (2000)
Sara Holland: I have never met a kid who didn't dream of being an astronaut when he grew up.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Did you ever meet a kid who didn't grow up?

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: What is a pancreas, anyhow? I mean, I don't know what the damn thing does for you, besides give you cancer.

[Frank and Hawk are asking a waitress who she would prefer to 'take home']
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Would you prefer this man, with his asymmetrical sagging ass-cheeks, his love-handles the size of Nebraska, and his oh-so-ugly in-grown toenail...?
Frank Corvin: [interrupting] Or this son of a bitch with the chicken-gizzard neck and the face that looks like thirty miles of Death Valley fire trail?

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Have you noticed how everybody seems to be dead lately?

Frank Corvin: You know what the worst day of my life was? The day Neil Armstrong set foot on the moon. I was probably the only person in America who wanted to commit suicide that day.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Well, thanks a lot Frank. We haven't spoken in twelve years and that's basically been the big question on my mind, what could make you commit suicide.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: What are you doing here?
Frank Corvin: Keeping a promise I made years ago.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Was that the promise you made to kill me or the promise you made to have both my legs broke?

[challenging Frank to fight]
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Okay, bad guy, we're taking this outside! I want to whip your asymmetrical sagging ass! Get out there in that parking lot!
[Frank and Hawk step outside]
Jerry O'Neill: Here we go again...
Tank Sullivan: I've got ten on Frank!

Young Pilot #1: Hey, Hawk. This guys wants a scary ride.
Jason: It's my birthday!
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: [pause] Happy birthday.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Flying brick... I like that.

Frank Corvin: [after Hawk crashes the shuttle during a simulation] Hawk, this isn't a stripped-down showplane. You've got to do it their way.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: I don't need a damn computer to tell me how to land an aircraft.
Roger Hines: It's not an aircraft, Colonel. It's a flying brick, and you've GOT to use the computer's protocols.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: What if the on-board computer fails?
Ethan Glance: It never has.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: [to the simulator supervisor] Houston, Horizon
Mission Control Tech: Go ahead
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Request second landing please.
[pause]
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Houston - Horizon, request on board computer FAILURE on second landing.
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: Run it again. Sock it to 'em.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: [Frank and Hawk are inside the centrifuge/spinning machine, which is about to be started] The first one to pass out buys the beers tonight...
Frank Corvin: [machine start spinning] You're on...
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: [machine speed increases and it's moving really fast] This thing's moving?...
Frank Corvin: I don't know... Doesn't seems to be moving to me...
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: [machine speed continues to increase] Say, fellas, is y'all's equipment broke down? Fellas?
[everybody's watching the show]
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: You're a pushover, Frank!.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: [machine is now spinning at top speed] I do believe it's moving now...
Tank Sullivan: That sure will take the wrinkles out
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: [walking into the control room] WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?
[crowd disappears]
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: [really pissed, hits the emergency stop on the centrifuge] I'm sure you think you're putting on a great show, but this is not a toy! Now which one of you assholes wants to explain this?
Frank Corvin: Gene?
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: WHAT?
Frank Corvin: Which one of us passed out first?
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: I'm getting too old for this shit...

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Hello, Ikon. How we feeling today?

Eugene 'Gene' Davis: Morning, Hawk.
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: Good morning.
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: What happened to your eye?
Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins: l fell in the shower. Tell maintenance to put some no-slip adhesives on that slippery floor.
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: How's it going, Frank?
Frank Corvin: Fine, fine.
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: Whats with the eye? Slip in the shower?
Frank Corvin: How would you know that?
Eugene 'Gene' Davis: l think I'll have a chat with the janitor.