Dirk Pitt
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Quotes for
Dirk Pitt (Character)
from Sahara (2005)

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Sahara (2005)
Al Giordino: [after going outside and being shot at] Next time, *you* go!
Dirk Pitt: What the hell took you so long?
Al Giordino: What? I stopped for coffee.
Dirk Pitt: Get a receipt?
Al Giordino: Yeah, I got a receipt, and I got you one, too!
Dirk Pitt: You're the best, Al!
Al Giordino: You know what? I'll even get you the money from Sandecker!

[two of Zatib's gunboats have just intercepted the NUMA team]
Dirk Pitt: I'm sorry, I don't speak English.
Gunboat Officer: You are speaking English right now.
Dirk Pitt: No, I only know how to say, "I don't speak English" in English.

Dirk Pitt: Hey, Al. Do remember that time when we were in Morocco?
Al Giordino: Ya, when you made me ride that damn camel, that bit my ass.
Dirk Pitt: Yeah, that's the time.
Al Giordino: [pauses, confused] Why?

Al Giordino: Man, the Admiral's gonna be mad when he hears you lost his satellite phone.
Dirk Pitt: Not as mad as when Rudi tells him it was attached to the boat.

Rudi Gunn: [after they pulled a Panama] Is that how it worked the first time?
Dirk Pitt: Well, it didn't really work the first time.

Dirk Pitt: [after they come across a wrecked plane in the middle of the Sahara] I'll bet you a hundred there's a tool kit in there.
Al Giordino: [looking at the tattered remnants of the plane] I don't wanna rain on your crazy parade, buddy, but I don't think we can fix this thing.

Dirk Pitt, Al Giordino: [at the same time] There's no way that should've worked!

Dirk Pitt: What do you do if you're about to be exposed as the biggest polluter in modern history?
Al Giordino: I don't know, run for president?

Dirk Pitt: [Dirk and Al are chained to each other and the bed of a pickup truck. They detach the bed and push it off the frame of the truck] Well, that's a new one.
Al Giordino: [Looking at the still attached chains] Yeah. We're home free now.

Al Giordino: [points at Dirks coin clue] Hey, you know my dad collected ancient coins, from Rome, China, Siam, Persia... somehow they all ended up in a shoe box in New Jersey.
Dirk Pitt: Meaning?
Al Giordino: Coins travel, Dirk. I mean, even if that poor guy was still alive, it could have been nothing.
Dirk Pitt: Yeah, but the coin traveled from somewhere Al. Unless it hitched a ride on the back of a dolphin, I'm gonna guess it's jumping off point was a little closer to where we're sitting.

Al Giordino: Hey, you know how it is when you see someone that you haven't seen since high school, and they got some dead-end job, and they're married to some woman that hates them, they got, like, three kids who think he's a joke? Wasn't there some point where he stood back and said, "Bob, don't take that job! Bob, don't marry that harpy!" You know?
Dirk Pitt: Your point?
Al Giordino: Well, we're in the desert, looking for the source of a river pollutant, using as our map a cave drawing of a Civil War gunship, which is also in the desert. So I was just wondering when we're gonna have to sit down and re-evaluate our decision-making paradigm?
Dirk Pitt: [coming up on the fortress seen in the cave painting] I don't know - it seems to be working so far.

Dirk Pitt: Al, did you bring the explosives from Massardes?
Al Giordino: Couldn't find them...
Dirk Pitt: Al...
Al Giordino: I didn't have time...
Dirk Pitt: Al!
Al Giordino: [yells] Of course I brought the explosives!

Dirk Pitt: He is going to blow it up.
Al Giordino: That isn't very subtle.

[Al, Dirk and Rudi are being chased in the Admiral's boat]
Al Giordino: What do you think, Dirk?
Dirk Pitt: Uh... I think we need to pull a Panama!
Al Giordino: A Panama... a *Panama*?
Admiral James Sandecker: [on the phone] A Panama? No! No Panama!

Dirk Pitt: We need to find that bomb.
Al Giordino: No. I'll find the bomb. You get the girl.
Dirk Pitt: ...Deal!

Dirk Pitt: [on a phone] Admiral?
Admiral James Sandecker: Dirk! Oh, thank God! Where the *hell* are you?
Dirk Pitt: Well, that's a damn good question, sir...

Dirk Pitt: We could use some serious muscle out here.
Admiral James Sandecker: Well, you're not gonna get it. I'm getting the D.C. two-step, big time!

Admiral James Sandecker: I can't ask you boys to do this alone.
Dirk Pitt: That's the great part about it, sir. You know you never have to.

Dirk Pitt: [to Eva] You, me, and the bay at Monterey

[last lines]
Dirk Pitt: There's something I wanted to say to you that I never got a chance to.
Eva Rojas: What's that?
Dirk Pitt: You DO throw like a girl! Hey! You do!

Dirk Pitt: [to Eva as Al, Dirk and Eva are being pursued in Kazim's car] I hope you don't throw like a girl!

Eva Rojas: You're late. I was told an 8:00 departure.
Dirk Pitt: What?
Al Giordino: I never said 8.
Dirk Pitt: I said 9.
Eva Rojas: Well, it's after 10.
Dirk Pitt: Well who said 8?

Al Giordino: Hey, you ever been after marlins, doctor?
Dirk Pitt: Oh, no, not the marlin story again, Al.
Al Giordino: Seven hundred and thirty-three pounds. Five and a half hours in the fighting chair.
Dirk Pitt: I thought it was 600 pounds.
Al Giordino: Hey! What did you catch that day? I can't remember anything at all.

Dirk Pitt: I'll meet you at the boat.
[Slaps Al in the arm then leaves the bar]
Al Giordino: [acts like Dirk is still there] Ow. No, I got the check. Don't worry about it. I'm serious. I know, I get it all the time. Sit down, I'll get the check. L'addition.

Al Giordino: Hey Dirk! Where are we headed?
Dirk Pitt: Hell if I know... but we're making great time!

Al Giordino: Ah, how do you put this thing on, anyway?
Dirk Pitt: What? Just wrap it around your noggin.
Al Giordino: Which part, this?
[Holds up end of turban fabric]
Al Giordino: .
Dirk Pitt: Yeah.
Al Giordino: [Pulls the fabric from his head] well, how come yours stays on?
Dirk Pitt: Maybe you have a small head.
Al Giordino: I don't think so. Someone would have told me.

Al Giordino: Hey, I cant remember how this works... something about a fox and a rabbit... its really bugging me
Dirk Pitt: The fox chases the rabbit around the tree and down the hole. Thats how the tie works buddy.

Yves Massarde: [to Dirk as he's trying to stop Massarde while holding a gun to Ava's head before the helicopter is about to take off] I apologize, Mr. Pitt. This is not what it appears.
Dirk Pitt: [dropping weapon and holding his hands up] Did I miss something? I've seen your toxic dump. I've seen sick Tuareg women and children and I saw the dead in Asselar. Did I leave something out?

Dirk Pitt: [while digging to find a way into the CSS Texas] How's it looking, Al?
Al Giordino: You're good!
Al Giordino: [Helicopter appears from behind sand dunes] DIG FASTER!

Dirk Pitt: [after he and Al crashed down the sand dunes on the truck bed and find the skeleton] No way!
Al Giordino: Why "no way"?
Dirk Pitt: [clearing the sand from the jacket] Kitty Mannock. She flew from London to Cape Town in 1931. They never found her or her plane. This must be where she crash.
Al Giordino: [pointing off to the wreckage] Nope. "That's" where she crashed.

Raise the Titanic (1980)
Dirk Pitt: You don't look like a scientist.
Dr. Gene Seagram: What's a scientist supposed to look like?
Dirk Pitt: I don't know... but if I saw you on the street I'd probably take you for a country club tennis pro. I'd never take you for a scientist.
Dr. Gene Seagram: Well that makes us even. I'd never take you for a pirate.

Dirk Pitt: We don't go to the mountain... the mountain comes to us!
General Busby: Are you talking about... raising the Titanic?
Dirk Pitt: [hushed] yeah...

Dirk Pitt: If anything goes wrong, we lose two men and if we don't do anything we lose them anyway. They've got two chances to die and one to live.

Dirk Pitt: You want to talk about distress, we have Navy weather forcasting a Force 12 storm, we have Russians looking down our throats and we are on a ship that never learned to do anything but sink, that's distress.

John Bigalow: It's an odd thing, you know. I've had a few ships shot out from under me. More than my share. Three in the 1914-18 fracas, and two in 39-45. But all anybody ever asks me about is the Titanic.
Dirk Pitt: [laughs] And now I'm doing the same thing.
John Bigalow: And you're lucky you came to the right man!

[last lines]
Dr. Gene Seagram: What's so funny?
Dirk Pitt: Eh... I knew a girl once.
Dr. Gene Seagram: I'll bet you did.
Dirk Pitt: Years later I ran into her again, she says "What happened to you? I thought you were going to change the world."
Dr. Gene Seagram: What'd you say?
Dirk Pitt: I said they had me outnumbered.
Dr. Gene Seagram: Is that my lesson for the day?
Dirk Pitt: [laughs] No more lessons, no more lectures.
Dr. Gene Seagram: You mean school's out?
Dirk Pitt: Yeah. You just graduated, Professor.