Mia Thermopolis
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Quotes for
Mia Thermopolis (Character)
from The Princess Diaries (2001)

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The Princess Diaries (2001)
Joe: This is between a waltz and a tango.
Mia: It's a wango?

Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Amelia, you look so... young.
Mia: Thank you. And you look so...
[long pause]
Mia: ... clean.

Michael: Why me?
Mia: Because you saw me when I was invisible.

Mia: Okay... you know what? I don't feel protected. You try living for 15 years thinking that you're one person, and then in five minutes, you find out you're a princess. Just in case I wasn't enough of a freak already, let's add a tiara!

Mia: I don't want to rule my own country, I just want to pass the tenth grade.

Mia: I can't be a princess! I'm still waiting for normal body parts to arrive!

Lilly: Michael, don't always think you could get a ride with us and...
[sees Mia's new look]
Lilly: Oy. Who destroyed you?
Mia: Oh. You-you think it looks that bad?
Lilly: You look ridiculous. You should sue.
Mia: Well um... I know it's a little straighter and shorter and...
Lilly: Weirder!
[Get's in limo]
Michael: An attractive weirder.
Lilly: No, it's not attractive!
Joe: Seat belts, please.
Lilly: What I really can't understand is that you ditched me again yesterday when I really needed your help at the greenpeace petition.
[picks up bag]
Lilly: These bags! You HAVE one of these bags? You know, we could hock that and feed a whole third world country!
[Looks at Michael]
Lilly: Am I right?
Michael: No.
Joe: If there are no more passengers, I think we should close the door.

Mia: [to her cat, Fat Louie] You are so lucky you don't know who your parents are.

Mia: Joseph, can we eighty-six the flags please?
Joe: No. The flags allow me to park anywhere. We keep the flags.
Mia: Sorry, Joseph.
Joe: You can call me, "Joe".
Mia: "Joey"?
Joe: [Chuckles then abruptly turns serious] No. Joe.

Mia: You'll never guess what Josh Bryant just asked me!
Michael: "Can I borrow a comb"?

Queen Clarisse Renaldi: You are princess of Genovia.
Mia: Me, a princess?
Mia: Shut up!
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: I beg your pardon, "Shut up"?
Consulate Maitre'D: Oh, your majesty, in America, it doesn't always mean to be quiet. Here it could mean "Wow, gee whiz, golly wolly"...

Mia: I can't do this, I'm a girl.
Gym Teacher Harbula: What am I? A duck?

Helen Thermopolis: Where are you going?
Mia: I'm going up to straighten the royal bedchamber.

Mia: As always, this is as good as it's going to get.

Mia: [on her green bathing suit] Okay I look like an asparagus.
Helen Thermopolis: But a very, very cute asparagus!

Mia: You know, most kids hope for a car for their 16th birthday, not a country!

Helen Thermopolis: This is getting us nowhere! Talk to me!
Mia: I can't talk to you right now. I'm late for a meeting with my guidance counselor.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: I'm late for a meeting with Spain and Portugal!

Helen Thermopolis: Mia, the-the three of us have to talk.
Mia: Oh, OK. Um, is there maybe something else about me and my life that just maybe I might want to know about? Um-oh no, are you two waiting to take me on a talk show somewhere and to let me know I have a twin sister who's a duchess?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: You have a cousin who's a contessa. Fondly known as Bartholomew. Actually, we call him Pookie.

Mia: Hey Joe? Can we park a block away from school? I really don't want to cause a riot with this hearse.
Joe: This is a non-riot hearse. And if it were a hearse there would be silence in the backseat.

Mia: Hey, Joe?
Joe: Mm-Hmmm?
Mia: I'm gonna turn the backseat into a dressing room so I can change into a proper outfit for Madame, OK?
Joe: OK. And don't forget your shoes.
Mia: Ahh, thanks.
Joe: Strange town, San Francisco. When I purchased the pumps, they asked if I wanted them wrapped or if I was going to wear them.

Mia: [driving in the rain] Is this punishment for driving without a licensed driver in the front seat?
[lies down on the front seat]
Mia: I am invisible, and I am wet.

Mia: Tell me, how does my mother, or any person for that matter, go into a parent/teacher conference and come out with a date?

Mia: Now, what did you want to tell me?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Something that, I think, will have a very big impact upon your life.
Mia: I already have braces.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: No, it's bigger than orthodontia.

Queen Clarisse Renaldi: So, where are you taking me?
Mia: Well, uh, do you have any change?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: No. It's not appropriate for royalty to jingle.
Mia: Okay, I'll get the change.
[cuts to a game arcade]

Mia: Somebody sat on me again.

Paolo: [removes Mia's glasses] Do you wear contact lenses?
Mia: Oh, I have them, but I don't like to wear them.
Paolo: Now...
[he breaks her glasses in half]
Paolo: ...you do.
Mia: [shocked] You broke my glasses!
Paolo: You broke my brush.

Mia: [Responding to Lilly's insults] Lilly! Just stop it, okay? Just because your hair sucks, get off mine!

Gym Teacher Harbula: Bobby Bad, hang up the phone.
Bobby Bad: [on his cell phone] Yes, Mom, I'll go to the dentist after school.
Mia: I hate it when they move in like that.
Gym Teacher Harbula: Mia, it's not a championship game, it's not even a *big* game, it's just gym class. Just hit the ball. I don't want to flunk you in gym class. C'mon, you can do it. Keep your eye on the ball.

Mia: And then I realized how many stupid times a day I used the word "I". In fact, probably all I ever do is think about myself. And how lame is that when there's, like, 7 billion other people out there on the planet and when -
[Grandmother clears throat]

Mia: [voiceover] Dear Diary, today is my first official day as Princess of Genovia. We'll land in a few hours, and I'll meet Parliament and the people before beginning my royal duties. Mom is, of course, moving to Genovia with me, and we'll continue painting - without the balloons. Lily and Michael are planning to spend their summer vacation at our - can you believe it - palace. They're even having my Mustang brought over, which I can legally drive in two weeks. Grandma's so glad to be going home, and Joseph - well, he's watching nearby as usual. Everybody's got pre-coronation jitters, including me. Everybody that is, except Fat Louie. He's totally adapted to being a royal. I guess he was one all along.
Joe: [voiceover] Princess, look out the window... and welcome to Genovia.

The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement (2004)
[Paolo has done Mia's hair in a very bizarre style]
Mia Thermopolis: I look like a moose.
Paolo: But a very cute moose. Make all the boy moose go 'WHAAAAA.'

Security Guard Lionel: Princess Mia! Princess Mia!
Mia Thermopolis: [Reluctantly] Yes?
Security Guard Lionel: Nothing, I'm just supposed to watch you.

Mia Thermopolis: I loathe you!
Nicholas Devereaux: I loathe YOU!
Mia Thermopolis: I loathed you FIRST!
Nicholas Devereaux: [kisses Mia]

Mia Thermopolis: [while watching a list of possible husbands, a picture of Prince William appears] Yes! Oh yes! I, I, I absolutely accept!
Charlotte Kutaway: Prince William. He's not eligible because he's in line for his own crown.
Mia Thermopolis: [Disappointed] Oh.
Joe: If he's not eligible, why is he included in these pictures?
Charlotte Kutaway: I just love to look at him.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Me too.
Mia Thermopolis: Mmm-hmm.
Joe: Your Majesty!
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Next?
Charlotte Kutaway: Antoine Suisson of Paris. Plays the harp. No title, but good family.
Lilly Moscovitz: What about the title "husband?"
Mia Thermopolis: Yeah, he's cute.
Joe: His boyfriend thinks he's handsome, also.
Mia Thermopolis, Lilly Moscovitz: Right on.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: No matter. Put him on all the invitation lists, he's a divine dancer.

Nicholas Devereaux: Tell me your greatest desires.
Mia Thermopolis: Tell me a secret.
Nicholas Devereaux: Isn't that the same thing?
Mia Thermopolis: Almost, but anyone can see your desires. No one knows what's in your heart.

Mia Thermopolis: I have my own mall!

Mia Thermopolis: I'm here!
[sits down and chair goes flying; Brigitte and Brigitta rush to help]
Mia Thermopolis: You know what, I'm fine, I'm good! So, what are we learning today?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: We are learning the art of the fan.
Mia Thermopolis: Fascinating.

Mia Thermopolis: [climbing down the vine] This really is more romantic in books.

Mia Thermopolis: Oh my God, you're here!
Lilly Moscovitz: I know!
Mia Thermopolis: In Genovia!
Lilly Moscovitz: I know!
Mia Thermopolis: You're in my closet!
Lilly Moscovitz: Yeah.
Mia Thermopolis: You're blonde!
Lilly Moscovitz: I'm blonde!

Mia Thermopolis: Oh, by the way, I'm getting married!
Lilly Moscovitz: To who?
Mia Thermopolis: I don't know.

Mia Thermopolis: Just because I didn't get my fairytale ending doesn't mean you shouldn't.

Nicholas Devereaux: [kneels before Mia] If I may be so bold, I would like an audience with Your Highness.
Mia Thermopolis: [motions for him to go ahead] What is your dilemma, young man?
Nicholas Devereaux: You are, in fact. I am in love with the Queen-to-be, and I am inquiring if she loves me, too.
Mia Thermopolis: Do you have a chicken for my table?
Nicholas Devereaux: No. No, my kitchen is out of chickens.

Mia Thermopolis: Are you ready?
Andrew Jacoby: [smiling] If you are.

Lady's Maid Brigitte: Princess Mia, a strange woman came in here and asked to hide in your closet so I let her.
Mia Thermopolis: Well, dear, that probably wasn't the best idea.

Nicholas Devereaux: Rapunzel, Rapunzel, with hair so fine. Come out your window, climb down the vine.
Mia Thermopolis: The feat you ask, dear sir, isn't easy. And I won't respond to that line, it's far too cheesy.

[Mia leaps onto the bed]
Lady's Maid Brigitte: We just made the bed.
Mia Thermopolis: This is so cool!

Andrew Jacoby: Mia, you chose me, and I accepted. Now were gonna stand up in church and say "I do," and tomorrow we'll be man and wife. And you will make an amazing queen of Genovia.
[Mia kisses Andrew on the cheek]
Mia Thermopolis: Thank you.

Queen Clarisse Renaldi: [teaching Mia the art of the fan; Mia is making faces behind her fan] Are you sassing your grandma?
Mia Thermopolis: I would never sass you, Grandma!
[Clarisse proceeds to swat Mia playfully with her fan]

Mia Thermopolis: I thought you said you never slide?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Oh I don't, but I have done a lot of flying in my day.

Queen Clarisse Renaldi: [shouts] Shut up!
Mia Thermopolis: Grandma said "Shut up"? Shut up!

Mia Thermopolis: [stepping on Nicholas's foot the first time] Oh! Your foot, I'm so sorry, are you all right?
Nicholas Devereaux: Oh I'll survive, Your Highness, the fault was entirely my own.
Mia Thermopolis: Are you sure you don't want to exchange licenses and proof of insurances?
Nicholas Devereaux: No, no. These shoes were a little big anyway. The swelling should help them fit better.

Mia Thermopolis: To be a princess, you have to believe that you are a princess. You've got to walk the way you think a princess would walk. So, you gotta think tall you gotta smile and wave, and just have fun.

Mia Thermopolis: Just remember, you are a princess.

Mia Thermopolis: Welcome. A few moments ago, I realized the only reason I was getting married was because of a law, and that didn't seem like a good enough reason. So, I won't be getting married today. My grandmother has ruled without a man at her side for quite some time, and... I think she rocks at it. So, as the granddaughter of Queen Clarisse and King Rupert...
Congregation: [interrupting] King Rupert, may he rest in peace!
Mia Thermopolis: I ask the members of Parliament to think about your daughters, your nieces, and sisters, and granddaughters, and ask yourselves: would you force them to do what you're trying to make me do? I believe I will be a great queen. I understand Genovia to be a land that combines the beauty of the past with all the best hope of the future. I feel in my heart and soul that I can rule Genovia. I... I love Genovia. Do you think that I would be up here in a wedding dress if I didn't? I stand here ready to take my place as your queen. Without a husband.

Lilly Moscovitz: Does this popcorn taste like pears?
Mia Thermopolis: Mmm, Genovian specialty.

Nicholas Devereaux: I haven't danced with you since your birthday.
Mia Thermopolis: That's a fact, not a secret.
Nicholas Devereaux: The secret is, I still want to.

Lady Blake: Mia. Did you happen to see who's here?
Mia Thermopolis: Who?
Lady Blake: The king wannabe with Lady Elissa.
Mia Thermopolis: Oh. Is she his... girlfriend?
Lord Jerome: Nicholas doesn't have girlfriends, he has dates... but attractive ones.
Lady Blake: You talk to him much?
Mia Thermopolis: Uh... we acknowledge each other.
[makes a face, Lady Blake laughs]
Mia Thermopolis: [Regaining composure, Mia calls over her shoulder] Andrew?
Andrew Jacoby: Yes, dear. Coming.
[approaches Mia]
Andrew Jacoby: Well, the camera's all ready to go, so...
Mia Thermopolis: Great. Let's go this way.

Mia Thermopolis: No more straggling for me.
Andrew Jacoby: You did very well, Mia. Very charming.
Mia Thermopolis: Oh, thank you.
Andrew Jacoby: Wait, wait, wait. The light is perfect.
[takes out his camera]
Mia Thermopolis: What?
Andrew Jacoby: Just one more, please.
Mia Thermopolis: [laughing] Please, no more pictures.
Andrew Jacoby: Come on, please. One more.
Mia Thermopolis: It's very flattering, but...
Andrew Jacoby: Mia, one more picture.
Mia Thermopolis: [laughing] I'm feeling shy, come on.
[see's Nicholas and Elissa]
Mia Thermopolis: Ah.
[turns Andrew to face Nicholas and Elissa]

Mia Thermopolis: Oh, well aren't you just... crafty. Do you want to know what else you were doing while you were doing your little lie dance?
Nicholas Devereaux: Lie dance?
Mia Thermopolis: Oh, yeah, that is exactly what you did.
Nicholas Devereaux: What is a lie dance?

[Nicholas is lingering a few feet away. Mia notices him]
Mia Thermopolis: Look over there.
Lilly Moscovitz: Should I shoo him? Should I shoo him? Just tell me who I should shoo and I'll shoo.