Shelley Levene
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Quotes for
Shelley Levene (Character)
from Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)

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Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)
Ricky Roma: How was her crumbcake?
Shelley Levene: Hmm? Oh... from the store.
Ricky Roma: Fuck her.

Shelley Levene: What the hell are you? You're a fuckin' secretary. Fuck you. That's my message to ya: fuck you and you can kiss my ass and if you don't like it baby I'm going across the street to Jerry Graff, period, fuck you.

Blake: You got leads. Mitch & Murray paid good money. Get their names to sell them. You can't close the leads you're given, you can't close shit, *you are* shit, hit the bricks pal, and beat it, 'cause you are going *out*.
Shelley Levene: The leads are weak.
Blake: "The leads are weak." The fucking leads are weak? You're weak. I've been in this business fifteen years...
Dave Moss: What's your name?
Blake: Fuck you. That's my name.
[Moss laughs]
Blake: You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. *That's* my name.

[Dave Moss explodes at Ricky Roma and shouts]
Dave Moss: You're fucked, Rick. Are you fucking nuts? You're hot, so you think you're the ruler of this place.
Shelley Levene: Now wait a minute, Dave.
Dave Moss: Shut up!
Shelley Levene: Okay...
Dave Moss: You want to decide who should be dealt with how, is that it? I come in the fucking office today, I get humiliated by some jag-off cop. I get accused of... I get the shit thrown in my face by you, you genuine shit, because you're top name on the board?
Ricky Roma: Is that what I did, Dave? I humiliated you? Oh my God, I'm sorry.
Dave Moss: Sitting on top of the world. Sitting on top of the world, everything's fuckin' peach fuzz.
Ricky Roma: And I don't get a moment to spare for some bust-out humanitarian down on his luck lately?
Dave Moss: Oh, fuck...
Ricky Roma: [cutting him off] Fuck you, Dave. You know you got a big mouth. You make a close, this whole place stinks with your farts for a week - how much you just ingested. Oh, what a big man you are! "Hey, let me buy you a pack of gum. I'll show you how to chew it." Whoof! You're pal closes, and all that comes out of your mouth is bile. Ooh, how fucked-up you are!
Dave Moss: Who's my pal, Ricky? Hmm? What are you? And what are you, Ricky? Huh? Bishop Sheen? What the fuck are you, Mr. Slick? Who - what the fuck are you, "Friend to the working man"? Big deal! FUCK YOU! You got the memory of a fuckin' fly! I never liked you, anyway.
Ricky Roma: What is this, your farewell speech?
Dave Moss: I'm going home.
Ricky Roma: Your farewell to the troops?
Dave Moss: I'm not going home. I'm going to Wisconsin.
Ricky Roma: Have a good trip.
Dave Moss: Aw, fuck you! Fuck the lot of you! Fuck you all!
Ricky Roma: [to Shelley] You were saying?
Shelley Levene: Huh?

Williamson: The leads are coming!
Shelley Levene: Get 'em to me!
Williamson: I talked to Mitch and Murray an hour ago. They're coming in, you understand. They're a bit upset about this morning's...
Shelley Levene: Did yo tell 'em about my sale?
Williamson: How could I tell them about your sale? I don't even have a teleph - I'll tell them about your sale when they bring in the leads, all right? Shelley, all right? You closed a deal. Fine. You made a good sale, fine.
Shelley Levene: It's better than a good sale. It's...
Williamson: Look, I have a lot on my mind right now. They're coming in, all right? They're very upset, I'm trying to make some sense...
Shelley Levene: I'm telling you - the one thing you can tell them is that it's a remarkable sale.
Williamson: The only thing 'remarkable' about it is who you made it to.
Shelley Levene: What the FUCK does that mean?
Williamson: That if the sale sticks, it'll be a miracle.
Shelley Levene: What does that mean? Why would it not... Oh, fuck you. You do not know your job. That's what I'm saying. You do not know your job. That's what I'm saying. A man IS his job and you are fucked at yours.

[Williamson is going to the cops]
Shelley Levene: Don't.
Williamson: Hehe... I'm sorry.
Shelley Levene: Why?
Williamson: Because I don't like you.
Shelley Levene: [in tears] My daughter.
Williamson: Fuck you.

Shelley Levene: Williamson! Williamson! Put me on the board! Put me on the Cadillac board!

Shelley Levene: [Levene has just cut a deal with Williamson to get 2 of the Glengarry leads for $100] What? What?
Williamson: Two leads. A hundred bucks.
Shelley Levene: Now?
Williamson: Yes, now... when?
Shelley Levene: Oh, shit John!
Williamson: [turns away from Levene] I wish I could.
Shelley Levene: You FUCKIN' asshole! I don't have it... I... I...
Shelley Levene: [Levene gets happy all of a sudden] I'll bring it to ya in the morning I'll be comin' in with the sales!
Williamson: Nope.

Williamson: How do you know I made it up?
Shelley Levene: Say what?
Williamson: How do you know I made it up?
Shelley Levene: Wha... what are you talking about?
Williamson: I told the customer his contract went to the bank.
Shelley Levene: It didn't?
Williamson: No, it didn't.
Shelley Levene: Don't fuck with me... Don't fuck with me! What are you saying?
Williamson: Well, I'm saying this Shell; usually I take the contracts to the bank. Last night I didn't. Last night I stayed home with my kids. One night in a year I left the contracts sitting on my desk, no one knew that but you. How did you know that? Do you wanna tell me or do you want to tell them?

Blake: You're talking about what. You're talking about... Bitching about that sale you shot, some sonofabitch who don't wanna buy land, some broad you're trying to screw, so forth. Let's talk about something important. They all here?
Williamson: All but one.
Blake: I'm going anyway. Let's talk about something important. Put. That coffee. Down. Coffee's for closers only. You think I'm fucking with you? I am not fucking with you. I'm here from downtown. I'm here from Mitch and Murray. And I'm here on a mission of mercy. Your name's Levine? You call yourself a salesman you son of a bitch?
Dave Moss: I don't gotta sit here and listen to this shit.
Blake: You certainly don't pal, 'cause the good news is - you're fired. The bad news is - you've got, all of you've got just one week to regain your jobs starting with tonight. Starting with tonight's sit. Oh? Have I got your attention now? Good. "Cause we're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know first prize is a Cadillac El Dorado. Anyone wanna see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. Get the picture? You laughing now? You got leads. Mitch and Murray paid good money, get their names to sell them, you can't close the leads you're given you can't close shit. You ARE shit. Hit the bricks, pal, and beat it 'cause you are going OUT.
Shelley Levene: The leads are weak.
Blake: The leads are weak? Fucking leads are weak. You're weak. I've been in this business 15 years...
Dave Moss: What's your name?
Blake: Fuck you. That's my name. You know why, mister? You drove a Hyundai to get here. I drove an eighty-thousand dollar BMW. THAT'S my name. And your name is you're wanting. You can't play in the man's game, you can't close them - go home and tell your wife your troubles. Because only one thing counts in this life: Get them to sign on the line which is dotted. You hear me, you fucking faggots? A-B-C. A-Always, B-Be, C-Closing. Always be closing. ALWAYS BE CLOSING. A-I-D-A. Attention, Interest, Decision, Action. Attention - Do I have your attention? Interest - Are you interested? I know you are, 'cause it's fuck or walk. You close or you hit the bricks. Decision - Have you made your decision for Christ? And Action. A-I-D-A. Get out there - you got the prospects coming in. You think they came in to get out of the rain? A guy don't walk on the lot lest he wants to buy. They're sitting out there waiting to give you their money. Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? What's the problem, pal?
Dave Moss: You - Moss. You're such a hero, you're so rich, how come you're coming down here wasting your time with such a bunch of bums?
Blake: You see this watch? You see this watch?
Dave Moss: Yeah.
Blake: That watch costs more than you car. I made $970,000 last year. How much'd you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave. I can go out there tonight with the materials you've got and make myself $15,000. Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can YOU? Go and do likewise. A-I-D-A. Get mad you son of a bitches, get mad. You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes BRASS BALLS to sell real estate. Go and do likewise gents. Money's out there. You pick it up, it's yours. You don't, I got no sympathy for you. You wanna go out on those sits tonight and close, CLOSE. It's yours. If not you're gonna be shining my shoes. And you know what you'll be saying - a bunch of losers sittin' around in a bar. 'Oh yeah. I used to be a salesman. It's a tough racket.' These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. They're for closers. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it. And to answer your question, pal, why am I here? I came here because Mitch and Murray asked me to. They asked me for a favor. I said the real favor, follow my advice and fire your fucking ass because a loser is a loser.

Shelley Levene: [first lines - on pay phone] 2-3-0-6. Hello honey, how're you doing?... Good... Oh, what did he say?... Uh huh, well is he still there?... Well how long ago did he leave?... Uh huh. Yeah well I'm stopping here, then I got a little meeting, and then I'll... oh, I would if I could... Oh as soon as I can, let me get off... Yeah, let me get off and I promise - I *promise you* it will be okay.
[kiss kiss]

Shelley Levene: You can't think on your feet, you oughta keep your mouth closed.

Shelley Levene: Get the chalk. Hey! Get the chalk... get the chalk! I did it! I closed 'em! I closed the cocksucker. Get the chalk, put me on the board, John. Put me on the Cadillac board, huh? Pick up the fuckin' chalk! Rick. Eight units. Mountain View.
Ricky Roma: You sold eight Mountain View?
Shelley Levene: You bet your ass. Who wants to go to lunch? Who wants to go to lunch? I'm buying.

Shelley Levene: You are a shithead, Williamson!
Williamson: Hmm hmm.
Shelley Levene: Can't think on your feet, you outta keep your mouth closed. Now can you hear me? I'm talking to you. Can you hear me?
Williamson: Yes, I hear you.
Shelley Levene: Ricky is right. Can't learn it enough, got to learn on the streets. You can't buy it, you gotta live it.
Williamson: Hmm.
Shelley Levene: [mocking him] Hmm hmm hmm yeah precisely. Because your partner depends on... I'm talkin' to you! I'm trying to tell you something.
Williamson: You are?
Shelley Levene: Yeah I am.
Williamson: What are you trying to tell me?
Shelley Levene: What Roma was trying to tell you what I told you a long time ago. You don't belong in this business.
Williamson: I don't belong in...
Shelley Levene: You may listen to me and say "Hey maybe the guy..." Oh fuck it. Listen to me now. Your partner depends on you. Your partner, the man who is your partner, depends on you and you go with him and for him or you're shit! Huh? You are shit! You can't exist alone.
Williamson: Excuse me...
Shelley Levene: Excuse you nothing! You be as cold as you want. You've just fucked a good man out on six thousand dollars and his goddamn bonus because you didn't know the shot! Gee, you could do that and you're not man enough to say what get you, I don't know what... if you can't take something from that than you're... scum, you're a fucking white bread. A child would know it and he's right. If you're gonna make something up, John, be sure that it helps. Or keep you mouth shut. I'm done with you.

Williamson: As you heard, end of the month, top salesman on the board gets the Eldorado. Next man down gets the...
Shelley Levene: What about the good leads?
Williamson: The leads I've given you.
Shelley Levene: But these leads are shit. They're old... I've seen them 100 times.
Williamson: Well, the leads are assigned randomly.
Shelley Levene: What about the new leads, huh? The new leads, the Glengarry leads.
Williamson: I've got them. I'm going to hang onto them. And they'll be assigned to closers, based on the sales volume, first to Roma.

Dave Moss: Did they steal the contracts?
Ricky Roma: The fuck you care?
Shelley Levene: [retelling to Roma his sales deal] "Harriet, I wanna tell you something..."
Dave Moss: What's that supposed to mean?
Shelley Levene: Will you shut up? I'm telling him something.
George Aaronow: [George gets in] Can we get some coffee?
Dave Moss: How you're doing?
George Aaronow: Fine.
Dave Moss: Uh huh.
George Aaronow: If anybody's going out, I could use some coffee.
[George exits]
Shelley Levene: [still telling his story] You do get the opportunity.
Dave Moss: [to Ricky] The fuck that's supposed to mean?
Shelley Levene: You DO get the opportunities, you get it as I get it, as everybody get it.
Dave Moss: Rick, did I don't care that they stole the contracts?
Shelley Levene: Now, I had them on the kitchen and I'm eating their crumb cakes...
Dave Moss: What does that mean?
Ricky Roma: It means, Dave, you haven't closed a good one in a month! None of my business you wanna push me to answer you. So, you haven't got a contract to get stolen so far.

Ricky Roma: You stupid fucking cunt. You, Williamson, I'm talking to you, shithead. You just cost me $6,000. Six thousand dollars, and one Cadillac. That's right. What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it, asshole? You're fucking shit. Where did you learn your trade, you stupid fucking cunt, you idiot? Who ever told you that you could work with men? Oh, I'm gonna have your job, shithead. I'm going downtown to talk to Mitch and Murray, I'm going to Lemkin. I don't care whose nephew you are, who you know, whose dick you're sucking on, you're going out. I swear to you, you're going...
Detective: Hey, fella, let's get this done.
Ricky Roma: Anyone in this office lives on his wits.
Ricky Roma: [to the detective] I'm going to be with you in a second.
Ricky Roma: [to Williamson] what you're hired for is to help us. Does that seem clear to you? To help us, not fuck us up. To help men who are going out there to try to earn a living, you fairy. You company man. I'll tell you something else, I hope you rip the joint off, I can tell your friend here a little something might help him to catch you. You want to learn the first rule? You'd know if you spent a day in your life. Don't ever open your mouth 'till you know what the shot is. You're a fucking child.
Shelley Levene: [after Roma leaves the room] You are a shithead, Williamson. If you can't think on your feet, you should keep your mouth closed.