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Frank
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Quotes for
Frank (Character)
from Billy Madison (1995)

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Billy Madison (1995)
Frank: I think Billy and his girlfriend are playing water polo or something.
Jack: Hey, maybe they're playing Marco Polo. Marco.
Frank: Polo. Jeez, that was a great game.

Frank: Who would you rather bone, Meg Ryan or Jack Nicholson?
Billy Madison: Jack Nicholson now, or 1974?
Frank: '74.
Billy Madison: Meg Ryan.

Frank: [to Billy] When I graduated first grade, all my dad did was tell me to get a job.

[after putting dog poop in a paper bag and lighting it on fire on Old Man Clemens' porch]
Billy Madison: Oh my God, Old Man Clemens hates shit.
Frank: Shh, here he comes.
Old Man Clemens: Who the hell is it? What do you want? Judas Priest, Barbara, it's one of those flaming bags again.
Barbara: Don't put it out with your boots, Ted.
Old Man Clemens: Don't tell me my business, Devil Woman. Call the fire department, this one's outta control.
[Old Man Clemens steps on the bag, then lifts up his boot and smells]
Old Man Clemens: Eck, poop again.
Billy Madison: He called the shit "poop".
[Billy, Jack, and Frank laugh hysterically]
Frank: This is the best night of my life.
[They continue laughing]
Old Man Clemens: I'll get you damn kids for this. You're all gonna die.

Frank: Hey, you wanna go feed that donkey some beer? Get it all messed up?
Billy Madison: Maybe later.