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[Ernie sees Dottie and Kit vigorously milking cows
] Ernie Capadino
: Ow. Doesn't that hurt them? Dottie Hinson
: Doesn't seem to. Ernie Capadino
: Well, that would bruise the hell out of me. Dottie Hinson
: Who ARE you? Ernie Capadino
: I'm Ernie Capadino. I'm a baseball scout. I saw you playing today. Not bad, not bad. You ever heard of Walter Harvey, makes Harvey bars - you know, the candy? Dottie Hinson
: Yeah. We feed them to the cows when they're constipated. Ernie Capadino
: That's the guy. He's starting a girls' baseball league, so he can make a buck while the boys are overseas. Wanna play? Dottie Hinson
: Huh? Ernie Capadino
: Nice retort. Tryouts are in Chicago. It's a real league, professional. Kit Keller
: Professional - baseball? Ernie Capadino
: Mmm-hmm. They'll pay you 75 dollars a week. Kit Keller
: We only make 30 at the dairy. Ernie Capadino
: Well then, this would be more, wouldn't it?
: [to a salesman
] You know, if I had your job, I'd kill myself! Wait here, I'll see if I can dig up a pistol.
: Yeah, I'm just going home, grab a shower and shave, give the wife a little pickle-tickle, and I'm on my way.
Lady on Train
: Sir your knee? Ernie Capadino
: Like It?
: Are you coming? See, how it works is, the train moves, not the station.
: Hey cowgirls, see the grass? Don't eat it.
: Hey, no skin off my ashtabula. You want to stay here plucking cows, that's your business.
: Come on now, one foot in front of the other, see?