Ron Thompson
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Quotes for
Ron Thompson (Character)
from Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989)

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Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989)
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: Something tells me we're not going fishing this weekend.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: That should make you happy.
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: Blow it out your shorts, Ron!

Amy Szalinski: If you were my brother, I'd put myself up for adoption.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Yeah, I hope your face ends up on a milk carton.

Ron Thompson: I'm your brother, Russ, you're not supposed to fink on your own brother!

Ron Thompson: What's a river doing in your backyard?
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: It's not a river, dope. It could be a stream of dog pee, and it would look like a river to us.

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: I could eat a corndog the size of a truck.
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: Ron, if you had a corndog it would be the size of a truck.

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Your dad will go to jail, your mother too. After all she's the one who paid for it all, that makes her an accomplice. Do you even know what it's like in jail?
Amy Szalinski: I'm not even going to tell you one more time to shut up.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: And then what? Then you'll smack me? You'll go to jail too. I'll tell them after a big bee ate my brother you smacked me around. No jury in the world would fail to convict you. The whole Szalinski family is going to be in jail for life...
Amy Szalinski: Look, my dad's machine works. When we get home and he fixes us all, we're gonna be so rich. You'll regret this.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Um... Amy, you know I've always liked your family. Your dad's a real nice guy. He's not as weird as I thought he was. I love you and Nick like... Like my own brother and sister.

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Hey Szalinski, ever do anything normal? Like play baseball?
Nick Szalinski: Nope. Baseball is for mortals.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Maybe you could be the base.
Nick Szalinski: Maybe you could be the mound.
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Sr.: Ronald, lug your stuff!
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Later, worm.

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: [as the kids eat an Oreo, now gigantic to them] They're never going to believe this at school.
Nick Szalinski: Yeah, I can just see the note to the teacher: "Dear Miss Mason, Nick is not absent. He's pinned to this note".

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: [the ground starts shaking] EARTHQUAKE!
Nick Szalinski: No, worse... LAWNMOWER!

Amy Szalinski: Good night, Russ.
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: Good night, Amy.
Nick Szalinski, Ron Thompson: [pause, then mockingly] Good night, Amy!

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: [to Amy] It's just that my dad doesn't understand your dad.
Amy Szalinski: Your dad doesn't understand anything.

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: They're never gonna find us! We were right under their noses and they didn't even see us!
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: Don't panic, Ron. We'll - we'll find a way.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: I'm not panicking.
[shouts]
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Who's panicked? Nobody's panicked!

Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: I just figured it out, I woke up this morning and this is all a bad dream.
Amy Szalinski: Ron, get up.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: You're just a nightmare. When I wake up this morning, my dad and I'll be going fishing.
Amy Szalinski: I'm warning you.
[hums with his eyes closed]
Amy Szalinski: Okay, Ron, maybe you're right. Maybe this is all just a bad dream. But, if it is, then...
[grabs his ears - hard]
Amy Szalinski: ...would this hurt?
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Ow!
Amy Szalinski: [shouting] Get up!

Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: He hit a baseball through your attic window...
Amy Szalinski: He what?
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: It shouldn't have been closed in the first place. It's a nice day!
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: We'll get it fixed okay? We'll take it out of his allowance all right?
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: My allowance? Dream on!
Russell 'Russ' Thompson, Jr.: Okay, we'll just have dad pay for it huh?
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: We'll take it out of my allowance... Now give me my ball back.
Nick Szalinski: Until you pay, no man shall pass.
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: You've got nothing to say about it, *space boy*!
Amy Szalinski: Cool it! Nick, take him upstairs and get him his ball. And clean up the mess.
Nick Szalinski: [incredulous] What?
Amy Szalinski: [impatiently] Do it, Nick! I don't have time to mess around.

Nick Szalinski: [sees Quark] It's Quark!
[whistles until Quark sees them]
Nick Szalinski: Oh, no!
Amy Szalinski: What is it, Nick?
Nick Szalinski: [observes the Thompsons' cat jumping from the fence] It's that stupid cat of theirs!
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Our cat is not stupid!
Nick Szalinski: [sees Quark being chased back in the house] It just chased Quark away!
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: It's Russ's stupid cat...
[his last word turns to panic as the stem tips over]
Amy Szalinski: Hang on, Nick!
Nick Szalinski: I can't! I'M SLIPPING!
[Nick falls into a flower full of pollen]

Nick Szalinski: [Ron lights a torch from cigarette ashes] Cool! Now we can see in the dark!
Ronald 'Ron' Thompson: Hey, Antie look! Headlights!
[Antie wiggles his antennae in curiosity]