Detective Chuck Fowler
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Quotes for
Detective Chuck Fowler (Character)
from Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (1999)

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Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (1999)
Detective Fowler: Do the letters T and J mean anything to you?
Deuce Bigalow: I don't know. Turkey Jizz?

Detective Fowler: You know anything about this?
[unzips his pants]
Detective Fowler: Look. See that red spot over there? That wasn't there this morning. I checked. You know what it is?
Deuce Bigalow: Maybe it's a rash. Something you got from jogging. How the hell do I know? Get it away from me.

Detective Fowler: [about his penis] I'm telling you if you painted it silver and twisted the end, it'd look like a kickstand.

Detective Fowler: Listen up, man-whore. I oughta bust you right now!
Deuce Bigalow: We just had sushi!
Detective Fowler: "Sushi?" Is that what they call it nowadays? I'm hip to your man-whore slang. All right, fine. Why don't I just go have a chat with your spicy tuna roll?

Detective Fowler: You better show some respect, or I'm gonna rip that little pleasure-giving tongue right out of your head! One more thing
[drops his pants]
Detective Fowler: I was at the precinct and I really had to use the John. And it's pretty filthy in there and I was in kind of a hurry, and I didn't have time to use one of those, you know, paper ass gaskets. I was doing my business, and something sort of splashed up on me, all over. What do you do in situations like that? You think I'll be alright?
Deuce Bigalow: I think you're pretty safe.
Detective Fowler: I'd better be!

Deuce Bigalow: If man-whoring has taught me anything, it's that most women are as unhappy with their entire body as you are with your small penis.
Detective Fowler: Thin penis.
Deuce Bigalow: Whatever. While you're worried about your penis...
Detective Fowler: Thin penis.
Deuce Bigalow: Women are worried about their height, their weight, their giant feet, the stream of obscenities that could burst through their mouth at any second. If you make a woman feel good about herself, it really doesn't matter what's wrong with you.
Detective Fowler: Even if it's really really thin? We're talkin' spaghetti stick.