Jesminder 'Jess' Kaur Bhamra
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Quotes for
Jesminder 'Jess' Kaur Bhamra (Character)
from Bend It Like Beckham (2002)

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Bend It Like Beckham (2002)
Joe: Where do you normally play?
Jess: In the park.
Joe: No... I meant what position?

[explaining to Joe how she got the large burn scar on her thigh that makes her shy of wearing shorts]
Jess: I was eight. My mum was working overtime at Heathrow. And I was trying to cook beans on toast. And I jumped up to the grill to get the toast. And my trousers caught light so my sister put me in the bath, poured cold water over me and pulled them off. And half my skin came off too.
Joe: Sorry.
Jess: I know - it put me off beans on toast for life.

Joe: Look, Jess. I saw it. She fouled you. She tugged your shirt. You just overreacted, that's all.
Jess: That's not all. She called me a Paki. But I guess that's something you wouldn't understand.
Joe: Jess, I'm Irish. Of course I understand what that feels like.

Tony: Look, Jessie. You can't plan who you fall for. It just happens. I mean, look at... Posh and Becks.
Jess: Well, Beckham's the best.
Tony: [chuckles] Yeah! I really like Beckham too.
Jess: Well of course you do. No one can cross a ball or bend it like Beckham
Tony: [shakes head] No, Jess. I *really* like Beckham.
Jess: What? You mean...
[incredulous scoff]
Jess: But you're Indian!

Jess: Anyone can cook aloo gobi, but who can bend a ball like Beckham?

Jess: I'm sorry I missed that penalty, coach.
Joe: It's okay, losing to the Jerries on penalties comes natural to you English. You're part of tradition now!

Jess: I didn't ask to be good at football, Gura Nanak must have blessed me.

Joe: Maybe after they train you up I'll sign you - if I can afford you.
Jess: Yeah you wish!

Mrs. Bhamra: Your sister's getting engaged and you're sitting here watching this skinhead boy!
Jess: Mum, it's Beckham's corner!

Joe: Look, I can't let you go without knowing.
Jess: What?
Joe: That even with the distance, and it concerns your family, we might still have something. Don't you think?

Jess: [after family accuses her of kissing a white boy who is really Jules] Me? Kissing? A boy? You're mad. You're all bloody mad.

Jess: Why are you doing this to me, Joe? Every time I talk myself out of it, you come around and make it sound so easy.
Joe: I guess I don't want to give up on you.

Joe: You're lucky... to have a family that cares that much about you. I can understand you don't want to mess with it.
Jess: Joe...
Joe: And I don't fancy being busted by your dad again. You better get back.

Jess: Joe! I'm going! They said I could go!
[Joe and Jess hug tightly]
Men in Background: Oi, oi, oi!
Jess: I'm sorry, I forgot.
Joe: That's okay now. I'm not your coach anymore. We can do what we want.
[Joe leans in to kiss Jess. Jess wants to, but pulls back]
Jess: Joe...
Joe: [quickly pulls away] Your dad's not here is he?
Jess: I'm sorry Joe. I can't.
Joe: I thought you wanted...
Jess: Letting me go to America is a really big step for my mum and dad. I don't know how they'd survive if I told them about you too.
Joe: I guess there's not much point with you going to America anyway. Is there?
[she shakes her head and they hug each other tightly]

Jules: We need you come to the Grand Final.
Jess: I can't.
Jules: [thinking it's about seeing Joe] You have to come!
Jess: No, I can't!
[sighs]
Jess: It's the same day as my sister's wedding.
Jules: [moaning quietly] Aw, shit.
Jess: [later, to Joe] Jess can't come on the 25th. It's the same day as her sister's wedding.
Joe: [angrily] *Shit!*

Jules: [at Jess's place, after Jess's dad sees Jess and Joe kissing] How are you?
Jess: I'm *really* in the shit now.

Hounslow Harrier: [teases Jess about her kicking] Wimp!
Jess: [retaliates] I'm better than you!
Hounslow Harrier: Ooooooooooh! Bitch!