Greg Marmalard
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Quotes for
Greg Marmalard (Character)
from Animal House (1978)

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Animal House (1978)
Dean Vernon Wormer: Greg, what is the worst fraternity on this campus?
Greg Marmalard: Well that would be hard to say, sir. They're each outstanding in their own way.
Dean Vernon Wormer: Cut the horseshit, son. I've got their disciplinary files right here. Who dropped a whole truckload of fizzies into the varsity swim meet? Who delivered the medical school cadavers to the alumni dinner? Every Halloween, the trees are filled with underwear. Every spring, the toilets explode.
Greg Marmalard: You're talking about Delta, sir.
Dean Vernon Wormer: Of course I'm talking about Delta, you TWERP!

[Dean Wormer's plotting to get rid of Delta House]
Greg Marmalard: But Delta's already on probation.
Dean Vernon Wormer: They are? Well, as of this moment, they're on DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION!

Greg Marmalard: Come outta there, you bastards!
Eric 'Otter' Stratton: [in falsetto] Who is it?
Greg Marmalard: You know damn well who it is.
Eric 'Otter' Stratton: I'm sorry. You'll have to come back later. I'm doing the dishes.

Greg Marmalard: [at the trial of Delta House V. Omega House] Robert Hoover will speak on behalf of Delta House.
Hoover: [the Deltas cheer as he stands up] I don't think you can fully judge a fraternity without looking at the positive qualities of the people in it. The Delta House has a long standing tradition of existence to its' members and to the community at large.
Dean Vernon Wormer: [to Marmalard] I think we've heard enough.
Hoover: I was told I would have a chance to speak?
Greg Marmalard: We've heard enough.
Hoover: But I was told I would have a chance to speak!
Doug Neidermeyer: HE SAID THAT'S IT! ARE YOU DEAF?
Dean Vernon Wormer: [to Marmalard] Let's finish this damn thing.
Bluto: [in the background] BULLSHIT!
[the other Deltas start chanting "bullshit"]
Hoover: I don't think it's fair!
Dean Vernon Wormer: [angry] I'll tell you what's fair!
Bluto: [in the background] EAT ME!
[the other Deltas start chanting "Eat me"]
Hoover: Hey will someone tell those assholes to shut up?
Boon: Hey shut up you assholes!
[shows Katy laughing hysterically]
Otter: [stands up] Point of parliamentary procedure!
Hoover: Don't screw this up, they're serious this time.
Otter: Take it easy man, I'm in pre law.
Boon: I thought you were pre med?
Otter: What's the difference? Ladies and gentlemen, I'll be brief.
Dean Vernon Wormer: What's he doing?
Otter: The issue here is not that we broke a few rules, or took a few liberties with our female party guests. We did.
[winks]
Otter: But you can't hold an entire fraternity responsible for the actions of a few sick, perverted individuals. For if you do, then shouldn't we blame the whole fraternity system? And if the whole fraternity system is to blame, then is this not an indictment of our education system in general? I put it to you, Greg! Isn't this an indictment of our entire American society? Well, you can do what you want to us, but I will not stand by and listen to you bad mouth the United States of America! Gentlemen!
[they cheer, walk out humming the US National Anthem]
Dean Vernon Wormer: You're not walking out of this one mister! You're finished! No more Delta! You've bought it this time, buster! I will call your national office! I will revoke your charter! And if you wise guys try one more thing, I am kicking you out of this college! No more fun of any kind!