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Quotes for
Horse (Character)
from The Full Monty (1997)

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The Full Monty (1997)
Dave: Well, I just pray they're a bit more understanding about us, that's all.
Horse: You what?
Dave: Well, they're going to be looking at us like that, aren't they, Eh? I mean, what if next Friday 400 women turn 'round and say "He's too fat, he's too old and he's a pigeon-chested little tosser."? What happens then, eh?
Horse: They wouldn't say that, would they?
Dave: Why not? He's just said her tits are too big.
Lomper: That's different. We're... blokes.
Dave: Yeah, and?
Gerald: I think she's got nice tits, actually.
Lomper: I never said owt about her personality, like. I mean, she's probably quite nice if you get to know her.
Dave: No. And they won't say nowt about your personality neither. Which is good 'cause you're basically a bastard. Bollocks to your personality - this is what they're looking at, right? And I'll tell you summat, mate. Anti-wrinkle cream there may be, but anti-fat-bastard cream there is none.

Horse: No-one said anything to me about the full monty!

Gaz: So, uh, Horse... What can you do?
Horse: I dunno, really... Let's see, there's the, uh... The bump, the stomp, the bus stop... Me breakdancing days are probably over, but there's always the funky chicken.

Horse: No, but... what I mean to say is... my willy...
Lomper: *Your* willy? *My* willy!

Horse: I think I'm going to be sick

Dole Clerk: Have you been actively looking for work in the last fortnight?
Horse: Yes
Dole Clerk: Have you done any work, paid or unpaid in the last fortnight?
Horse: No
Dole Clerk: That's not what I've heard