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Quotes for
K-9 (Character)
from "Doctor Who" (1963)

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"Doctor Who: The Androids of Tara: Part Four (#16.16)" (1978)
[as K9 quietly cuts a hole in a panel of wood with his blaster to allow the Doctor ingress to the castle, bells start ringing]
Doctor Who: Hear that, K9? Wedding bells or a funeral knell, hmm? Do hurry up! A hamster with a blunt penknife could do it quicker.
K9: You ordered me to make no noise, Master.
Doctor Who: Just get on with it!

Doctor Who: Now, listen. There's bound to be lots of stairs in there. You stay here and keep an eye on the boat, hmm? I might have to bring the others out this way if anything goes wrong.
K9: Affirmative, Master.
Doctor Who: And don't fall in the water.
K9: I am familiar with boats, Master.
Doctor Who: You old sea-dog, you! Now don't forget: stand guard and be careful! Be careful!
[the Doctor ducks back inside and promptly yells loudly as he falls over something]
K9: Master?
[the Doctor peers out again]
Doctor Who: Shh!
[the Doctor ducks back in]

"Doctor Who: The Pirate Planet: Part Two (#16.6)" (1978)
The Doctor: Where's Romana?
K9: She has been arrested, Master.
The Doctor: What?
K9: She sent me to inform you.
The Doctor: Why didn't you?
K9: I made four attempts, Master, but you would not allow me to tell you, Master.

K9: Master?
The Doctor: Not now, K9, not now! Now... K9... can you track the Mentiads by their psycho-spoor?
K9: Affirmative, Master. Psychokinetic energy on that level leaves considerable disturbance in the aether.
The Doctor: Excellent, excellent.

"Doctor Who: Full Circle: Part One (#18.9)" (1980)
Voice of K-9: Course set and holding. ETA to Gallifrey: thirty-two minutes. Flight path: clear. Wait! Sensors indicate... No vocabulary available.

Voice of K-9: All component parts are functioning normally, Master.
Doctor Who: I don't believe it. I don't believe it! "All component parts functioning normally." Ha! Pheh! You mean to tell me, that after all we've been through, the systems are functioning perfectly?
Voice of K-9: No, not perfectly, Master. Adverb attributed was "normally."

"Doctor Who: Warriors' Gate: Part Two (#18.18)" (1981)
K9: The accuracy of this unit has deteriorated below zero utility.
Adric: You mean you're worse than useless.
K9: Affirmative.

Gundan: We are Gundan. We exist to kill. Slaves made the Gundan to kill the brutes who rule.
Doctor Who: What particular brutes did you have in mind?
Gundan: The Gundan were sent where no slaves could go. We faced the Time Winds and we lived. They had only the gateway to flee for safety.
Doctor Who: Gateway? Gateway to where?
Gundan: Gateway... Gateway... Gateway...
Doctor Who: Gateway to WHERE? Just as it was getting interesting. If only I had an alternative source of energy.
K9: [entering] Orders, Master.
Doctor Who: K-9! Just the chap I wanted.

"Doctor Who: The Armageddon Factor: Part One (#16.21)" (1979)
The Doctor: Where's your joy in life? Where's your optimism?
Romana: It opted out.
K9: Optimism: belief that everything will work out well. Irrational, bordering on insane.

"Doctor Who: The Pirate Planet: Part Three (#16.7)" (1978)
K9: My subsequent analysis of their brainwave patterns indicated no malice when they attacked him.
Mula: You mean they slammed him to the wall with good vibrations?
K9: Affirmative.

"Doctor Who: The Invasion of Time: Part One (#15.21)" (1978)
K9: You are very stupid machine

"Doctor Who: The Armageddon Factor: Part Three (#16.23)" (1979)
K9: It is stimulating to communicate for once with something other than a limited and unpredictable organic intelligence.
Doctor Who: What did you just say? With something other?
K9: Affirmative. I have been communicating with my own kind.

"Doctor Who: The Stones of Blood: Part One (#16.9)" (1978)
Romana: Uh, K-9, what is tennis?
K9: Real, lawn or table, mistress?
Romana: Never mind. Forget it.
K9: Forget. Erase memory banks concerning tennis.
K9: Memory erased.

K-9 and Company: A Girl's Best Friend (1981) (TV)
Brendan Richards: Who is the Doctor?
K-9: Affirmative.

"Doctor Who: Underworld: Part One (#15.17)" (1978)
Doctor Who: He's my 2nd best friend. Aren't you K-9?
Voice of K9: Affirmative.

"Doctor Who: The Pirate Planet: Part One (#16.5)" (1978)
K9: Suggest you allow Mistress to make contact.
The Doctor: Nonsense! Making contact with an alien race is an immensely skilled operation. It calls for tact and exper... What would SHE know about it?
Romana: [in background making contact] Hello. Excuse me...
K9: She is prettier than you, Master.
The Doctor: [nonplussed] Is she?

"Doctor Who: The Armageddon Factor: Part Five (#16.25)" (1979)
K9: Your silliness is noted.

"Doctor Who: The Pirate Planet: Part Four (#16.8)" (1978)
Romana: What about the bridge and the Time Dams?
Doctor Who: Bridge and time... K9!
K9: Piece of cake, Master. Blow them up.
Romana: Oh, isn't that rather crude?
Doctor Who: Well... it's a bit crude but immensely satisfying.

"Doctor Who: The Armageddon Factor: Part Two (#16.22)" (1979)
Doctor Who: We all make mistakes sometimes, don't we, K-9?
K9: Clearly.

"Doctor Who: The Stones of Blood: Part Two (#16.10)" (1978)
K9: Master.
Doctor Who: [startled] Shh! What? K-9, why don't you bark or something?
K9: I'm not programmed to bark, master.
Doctor Who: Yes, but listen - never mind about that - I've got a job for you. Now you've always wanted to be a bloodhound.
K9: Negative, master.
Doctor Who: Yes, you have. Yes, you have!
K9: Negative.
Doctor Who: Sh! Now here's your chance. Find Romana, hm?
K9: Program: achievable, master. The mistress's scent, blood, tissue type and alpha wave pattern are all recorded in my data bank.
Doctor Who: Yes, yes. Don't just talk about it, K-9. Do it!