The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
: [on the Eiffel Tower
] Nice, isn't it? Romana
: Yes, marvellous. The Doctor
: Marvellous. Absolutely. Romana
: Absolutely marvellous. The Doctor
: Well, I think it's marvelous. Romana
: So do I. Though it's not quite as you described it. The Doctor
: Really? How did I describe it? Romana
: Well, you said it was nice. The Doctor
: It's the only place in the Universe where one can relax entirely. Romana
: Mmm... That bouquet! The Doctor
: What Paris has, it has an ethos... a life... It has... Romana
: A bouquet? The Doctor
: A spirit all of its own. Like a wine, it has... Romana
: A bouquet. The Doctor
: It has a bouquet. Yeah. Like a good wine. You have to chose one of the vintage years, of course. Romana
: What year is this? The Doctor
: Ah, well... well, it's 1979, actually. More of a table wine, shall we say? Ha! A randomizer is a useful device, but it lacks true discrimination. Shall we sip it and see? Romana
: Oh, I'd be delighted. Should we take the lift or fly? The Doctor
: Let's not be ostentatious. Romana
: All right, let's fly, then. The Doctor
: That would look silly. We'll take the lift, come on.
: Where are we going? The Doctor
: Are you talking philosophically or geographically? Romana
: Philosophically. The Doctor
: Then we're going to lunch. I know a little place that does a wonderful bouillabaisse. Do you like bouillabaisse? Romana
: Mmm, bouillabaisse, yum-yum.
: Don't move! You might spoil a priceless work of art. Romana
: What? The Doctor
: That man over there. Don't look. Romana
: What's he doing? The Doctor
: Shh... Romana
] What's he doing? The Doctor
: He's sketching you. Romana
: Is he?
[she turns around, the artist grumpily crumples the sketch up and throws it to the floor and leaves
] The Doctor
: I told you not to look. Romana
: I just wanted to see. The Doctor
: It's too late. He's gone now. Romana
: Pity, I wonder what he thought I looked like. The Doctor
: Well, he threw it down there. Let's have a look...
: You and I exist in a special relationship to time, you know. Perpetual outsiders. Romana
: Don't be so... portentous.
: Well, at least on Gallifrey we can capture a good likeness. Computers can draw. The Doctor
: What? Computer pictures... You sit in Paris and talk of computer pictures? Listen, I'll take you somewhere and show you some real paintings painted by real people. Romana
: What about the time slip? The Doctor
: Never mind about the time slip. We're on holiday. Come on!
: You know, I think something very funny's going on. You remember that man that was following us? Romana
: Yes. The Doctor
: Well, he's standing behind me, poking a gun in my back.
[In the Lourve, the Doctor experiences another strange sensation of time repeating itself. He staggers and collapses and a crowd gathers
: All right, stand back. Stand back, everybody, stand back. Are you all right, sir?
[the Doctor tries to stand up and bumps his head into the man's torso
] The Doctor
: Yes. I just dented my head on your gun, that's all. Romana
: Don't take any notice of him. He's just having one of his funny turns. The Doctor
: One of my funny turns? The whole world took a funny turn.
: What's Scarlioni's angle? The Doctor
: Scarlioni's angle? I've never heard...
] The Doctor
: Have you ever heard of Scarlioni's angle? Romana
: No, I was never any good at geometry. The Doctor
: [to Duggan
] Who's Scarlinoi? Duggan
: Count Scarlioni. Everyone on Earth's heard of Count Scarlioni. The Doctor
: Ah, well, we've only just landed on Earth.
: There we are, the Louvre. One of the greatest art galleries in the whole galaxy. Romana
: Nonsense! What about the Academia Stellaris on Sirius Five? The Doctor
: What? Oh no. No, no. Romana
: Or the Solarian Pinaquotheque at Strikian? The Doctor
: Oh, no, no. Romana
: Or the Braxiatel Collection? The Doctor
: No, no, no, no, no, no. This is the gallery. The only gallery in the known universe which a picture like...
[cut to inside the gallery
] The Doctor
: The Mona Lisa. Romana
: It's quite good. The Doctor
: Quite good? That's one of the great treasures of the universe and you say quite good? Romana
: The world, Doctor, the world. The Doctor
: What are you talking about? Romana
: Not the universe in public, Doctor. It only calls attention. The Doctor
: I don't care. It's one of the great treasures of the universe! Romana
: Shh. The Doctor
: I don't care, let them gawp, let them gape. What do I care?
: [looking at the green bracelet the Doctor stole from a woman in the gallery
] It's a micromeson scanner. The Doctor
: That's right. She was using it to get a complete report on all the alarm systems around the Mona Lisa. Romana
: Do you mean she was trying to steal it? The Doctor
: It is very a pretty painting. Romana
: It's a very sophisticated device for a level five civilisation. The Doctor
: That? That's never the product of Earth's civilisation. Romana
: Do you mean an alien's trying to steal the Mona Lisa? The Doctor
: It is a very pretty painting.
[Two men with guns have just forced the Doctor to hand over the green bracelet
: Are you all right? The Doctor
: Yes, I'm just relaxing and enjoying Paris. Duggan
: All right, that's enough. Very cleverly staged, but you don't fool me. The Doctor
: What are you talking about? Duggan
: Your men who were in here just now. The Doctor
: My men? Those thugs? Duggan
: Your thugs. The Doctor
: Are you suggesting those men were in my employ? Duggan
: Yes. The Doctor
: I don't know if you noticed but he was pointing a gun at me. Anyone in my employ who behaved like that, I'd sack him on the spot.
: Well, so much for the paranormal. It's back to brute force, I suppose.
: Newton? Who's Newton? Doctor Who
: Old Issac? Friend of mine on Earth. Discovered gravity. Well, I say he discovered gravity; I had to give him a bit of a prod. Romana
: What did you do? Doctor Who
: Climbed up a tree. Romana
: And? Doctor Who
: Dropped an apple on his head. Romana
: Ah. And so he discovered gravity. Doctor Who
: No-no, he told me to clear off out of his tree. I explained it to him afterwards at dinner.
: Switch off the TARDIS forcefield. Romana
: What? But that's madness. It's the only protection we've got! Doctor Who
: I know. Do it! Romana
: It's been nice knowing you, Doctor. Doctor Who
: And you.
: Calufrax... Doctor Who
: ...is not a normal planet. It's an artificially metricised structure consisting of a substance with a variable atomic weight.
: We can't move anything in here. If we do, we'll just upset the whole system and create a gravity whirlpool. Doctor Who
: Not if I do something immensely cleaver.
: What about the bridge and the Time Dams? Doctor Who
: Bridge and time... K9! K9
: Piece of cake, Master. Blow them up. Romana
: Oh, isn't that rather crude? Doctor Who
: Well... it's a bit crude but immensely satisfying.
: Oh, no! Romana
: What? The Doctor
: How paralyzingly dull, boring and tedious! Romana
: Oh, our next destination? The Doctor
: Yes. Calufrax.
: Suggest you allow Mistress to make contact. The Doctor
: Nonsense! Making contact with an alien race is an immensely skilled operation. It calls for tact and exper... What would SHE know about it? Romana
: [in background making contact
] Hello. Excuse me... K9
: She is prettier than you, Master. The Doctor
] Is she?
: I am perfectly capable of admitting when I'm wrong! Romana
: Oh! The Doctor
: Yes! Only this time, I wasn't.
: Well, according to these space-time coordinates, we have arrived at precisely the right point in space at precisely the right time. Romana
: Yes, I know. The Doctor
: But to the wrong planet. Romana
: What? The Doctor
: This isn't Calufrax. Romana
: Then where are we? The Doctor
: I haven't got the faintest idea.
: This is a forbidden object. Romana
: Why? Guard
: That is a forbidden question.
: Adric, is there any machinery on your planet that could lift the TARDIS? Adric
: How heavy is it? Romana
: Uhm, five times ten to the six kilos in your gravity. Adric
: If the Doctor's therory's right, we'll need a local image translator to see what's out there. Adric
: Or we could just look out through the door.
: Senseless creatures! Romana
: I don't think so. They're adapting very fast. That's intelligent behavior. Tylos
: Intelligent? Trying to kill us? Romana
: But they probably don't even know anyone is in here. To them the TARDIS is just a bog boulder.
: So if the Marshall attacks... Shapp
: Which he will. Doctor Who
: There'll be a rather large bang, big enough to blow up Zeos, take Astrios with it, and make certain the whole thing ends in a sort of draw. That's the way these military minds work: the Armageddon Factor.
: AH! Romana
: What? Doctor Who
: I've stopped the universe. Still, they'll never notice.
: How do you set about localizing a time loop? Romana
: Well, if one has God-like powers, one ought to be able to use them, oughtn't one?
: You know what I don't understand? Romana
: I expect so.
: You should go into partnership with a glazier. You'd have a truly symbiotic working relationship. Duggan
: What? Romana
: I'm just pointing out that you break a lot of glass.
[she puts a pair of wine glasses in front of him. Instead of opening the wine bottle he smashes the neck off it
: You can't make an omelette without breaking eggs. Romana
: If YOU wanted an omelette, I'd expect to find a pile of broken crockery, a cooker in flames and an unconscious chef.
: You've got a pretty cynical attitude to life, haven't you, Duggan? Duggan
: Well, when you've been around as long as I have. How old are you, anyway? Romana
: It's always darkest before the storm. Romana
: Dawn. Doctor Who
: Dawn. Isn't that right K-9?
: Don't you want to get back to Gallifrey? Romana
: You KNOW I don't want to get back to Gallifrey. Doctor Who
: Then we'll burn that bridge when we come to it. It's all academic unless we've found a C.V.E. Romana
: What about Adric? Doctor Who
: What ABOUT Adric? Romana
: Well, if we get out of E-Space, we'll be taking him away form his own universe. Doctor Who
: So? Romana
: Do we have that right? Doctor Who
: Oh, he'll love it on Gallifrey.
: Others follow. Doctor Who
: Others? Biroc
: Believe nothing they say. They're not Biroc's kind. Romana
: Well, what are you? Biroc
: A shadow of my past and of your future.
: Surely you realize something here must be wrong. Zargo
: Wrong? Doctor Who
: R... yes. Camilla
: What is, is. Doctor Who
: Well, what IS is wrong. Look, societies develop in varying ways. Yours just seems to be sinking back into some sort of primitivism, wouldn't you say so? Romana
: Oh, yes. Doctor Who
: There. Romana
: In terms of applied sociogetics, it's losing it's grip on level two development. Doctor Who
: On level two? Romana
: A society that evolves backwards must be subject to some even more powerful force restraining it.
: Do you know, it just occurs to me there are vampire legends on almost every inhabited planet. Romana
: Really? Doctor Who
: Whatever it is, we want to find it, don't we? Romana
: No. Doctor Who
: Good. Come on, then.
: I don't think we should interfere. Doctor Who
: Interfere? Of course we should interfere! Always do what you're best at, that's what I say. Now come on.
: Doctor, this is important scientific research. I am helping to conserve endangered species. Doctor Who
: By putting them in this machine? Tryst
: Oh, yes. Doctor Who
: Ah, yes, of course. Just in the same way a jam maker conserves raspberries, ha-ha. Romana
: [after the Doctor leaves
] Oh, don't mind him. He just likes to irritate people.
: Someone aboard this ship is snuggling drugs. Vraxoin. Romana
: Vraxoin! Doctor Who
: Yes. Romana
: I thought that was stamped out long ago. Doctor Who
: Yes. Romana
: The only known source was destroyed, wasn't it? Doctor Who
: That's right. They incinerated an entire planet. Someone's found another source.
[repeated lines of the chronic hysteresis
: Oh, blast. Here we go again. The Doctor
: What's the matter? Romana
: Well, now his probe circuit's jammed. The Doctor
: Oh, that's easy; just waggle his tail. Romana
: All right. We've tried everything else. K-9
: Thank you, Mistress. Repairs complete.
: Please, please, can we do just one thing at a time? The Doctor
: First things first? Romana
: Exactly. The Doctor
: But not necessarily in that order.
: Round and round for all eternity. Romana
: Oh, blast. Here we go again.
: Where's your joy in life? Where's your optimism? Romana
: It opted out. K9
: Optimism: belief that everything will work out well. Irrational, bordering on insane.
: Whenever you go into a new situation, you must always believe the best until you find out exactly what the situation's all about, THEN believe the worst. Romana
: Ah, but what happens if it turns out NOT to be the worst after all? The Doctor
: Don't be ridiculous. It always is.
: I told you you've got the time wrong, Doctor. The Doctor
: Yes, but you're always saying that. Romana
: You're always getting the time wrong.
: Was it to do with the voices? Professor Chronotis
: What voices? The Doctor
: Well, when I was on the river, I heard a strange babble of inhuman voices. Didn't you, Romana? Romana
: Yes. Professor Chronotis
: Oh, undergraduates talking to each other, I expect. I've tried to have it banned.
[They've gone back in time 400 million years
] Doctor Who
: [dips his hand into a pool of black sludge
] The amniotic fluid from which all life on Earth will spring, where the amino acids fuse to form minute cells. Cells which eventually evolve into vegetable and animal life. You, Duggan.
[he rubs some onto Duggan's hand
: I come from that, that soup? Doctor Who
: Yes. Well, not that soup exactly. It's inert, there's no life in it yet. It's waiting on a massive dose of radiation. Romana
: The Jagaroth ship? Doctor Who
: Yes. The explosion that caused Scarlioni to splinter in time also caused the birth of the human race. And that's what's about to happen. The birth of life itself. Duggan
: Here, while we watch? Doctor Who
: No, no. If we were watching we'd be in dead trouble. We've got to stop Scaroth. Duggan
: Scaroth? Doctor Who
: Yes, that's his real name. If we don't stop him, the entire human race will cease to exist instantly.
: Where do you two come from? Doctor Who
: From? Well, I suppose the best way to find out where you've come from is to find out where you're going and then work backwards. Duggan
: Where are you going? Doctor Who
: I don't know. Romana
: Nor do I. Doctor Who
: ...One more thing. Your name. Romana
: What about my name? The Doctor
: It's too long. By the time I've called out, "Look out..." What's your name? Romana
] Romanadvoratrelundar. The Doctor
: By the time I've called that out, you could be dead. I'll call you "Romana". Romana
: I don't like "Romana". The Doctor
: It's either "Romana" or "Fred". Romana
: All right, call me "Fred". The Doctor
: Good. Come on, Romana.
: [introducing herself
] My name is Romanadveratnalundar. The Doctor
: Well I'm so sorry about that, is there anything we can do?
: Anyone for tennis? Romana
: Tennis? The Doctor
: Yes. It's an English expression. It means "Is anyone coming outdoors to get soaked?"
: Uh, K-9, what is tennis? K9
: Real, lawn or table, mistress? Romana
: Never mind. Forget it. K9
: Forget. Erase memory banks concerning tennis.
: Memory erased.
: I'm glad all this has ended so satisfactorily. Doctor Who
: If it has ended. Foamasi Ambassador
: With the arrest of those two, peace is restored. Romana
: What the Doctor means is... Foamasi Ambassador
: Is don't cross your bridges before they're hatched.
] Doctor Who
: I think we're over and done with here. Let's go. Romana
: The randomiser. Doctor Who
: What about it? Romana
: Well, we can't just leave it here. Doctor Who
: Why not? I don't like not knowing where we'll turn up next. Romana
: Neither does the Black Guardian. That's the point of the thing. Doctor Who
: Well, that's a... Romana
: The Black Guardian's a *real* threat. Doctor Who
: [shakes head
] Some galactic hobo with ideas above his station; the cosmos is full of them. Anyway, there's been enough randomising on this job. Romana
: Job? It was supposed to be a holiday. Doctor Who
: Well then I'm gonna be very glad to get back to work. And I'm missing K9.
: What is that thing in the pit? Lady Adrasta
: We call it - The Creature. Romana
: Ah, that's original.
: [about the creature
] Our researchers divide into two categories: The ones who have got close enough to find out something about it... Romana
: Yes. Lady Adrasta
: ...and the ones who are still alive.
: [spotting the TARDIS
] There she blows! Adric
: We found it. Doctor Who
: Yes. Well, that's one of the advantages of living in a rapidly shrinking micro-universe. Romana
: What are the others? Doctor Who
: Other what? Romana
: Other advantages. Doctor Who
: Ah, well, that's difficult to say.
: Biroc! What are you doing here? Biroc
: Nothing. Doctor Who
: It's all right for you. Biroc
: And you, too. Do nothing. Doctor Who
: Do NOTHING? Romana
: Of course, Doctor. Don't you see? Doctor Who
: Yes. That's righ... Do nothing... if it's the right sort of nothing.
: I did calculate our chances of success at 74,384,338 to 1 against. Doctor Who
: What? 74,384,338? Why, that's extraordinary! Romana
: Why? Doctor Who
: Well, that's my lucky number!
: So, Erato came here to offer you metal in return for chlorophyll. Of course. Doctor Who
: Right. But who was the first person he met? Organon
: The person who held the monopoly of metal here. Doctor Who
: Right. And did she put the welfare of her struggling people above her own petty power? No. She's tipped the ambassador into a pit and thrown astrologers at him.
: [to a scruffy group of scavengers and their leader
] Go ahead and kill me. Commit suicide. Listen to that hirsute moron. Torvin
: Here! Who are you calling hirsute? Romana
: You. Do you want to make something of it? Torvin
: No, I just wanna know what it means.
] I'm a traveler, I'm a Time Lord, and I am not used to being assaulted by a collection of hairy, grubby little men. Torvin
: Well, she's no call to get personal. Romana
: I don't intend to get used to it, either. Sit down! Torvin
: Wha... Kill her!
: You can't fight Time Lords, Romana. Romana
: You did. Doctor Who
: Once, and lost.
: Real space doesn't have negative coordinates. Doctor, that disruption we came through. Doctor Who
: Well, it's just a thought. Romana
: It's a rather nasty thought. That would mean we're out of real space altogether.
: What do you know about the Time Lines? Romana
: My ship travels through them. So does yours. Packard
: How do you know that? Romana
: It must do. That's how we've all got stuck here. We are in the theoretical medium between the striations of the continuum.
: You know about warp drive? Romana
: What are you using, Continuum Warp or Implicate Theory? Lane
: Super Lightspeed with dampers. Romana
: Well, it's probably your Tyroidal Time Dilators. They're usually the first to go.
: We have the power to do anything we like, absolute power over every particle in the universe, everything that has ever existed or ever will exist as from this moment. Are you listening to me, Romana? Romana
: Yes, of course, I'm listening. Doctor Who
: 'Cause if you're not listening I can make you listen, because I can do anything. As from this moment there's no such thing as free will in the entire universe. There's only my will because I possess the Key to Time.
: Well if I knew where I was going, there'd be a chance the Black Guardian would, too - hm? - hence, this new device. Romana
: What is it? Doctor Who
: Ah, well, it's called a randomizer, and it's fitted to the guidance systems and operates under a very complex scientific principle called pot luck. Now, no one knows where we're going, not even the Black Guardian.
: We're outside. Romana
: Pity. I want to be on the inside. Adric
: But I've just rescued you. Romana
: Thank you, but I have GOT to find out what they're up to in there. Do you know what a Tharil is? Adric
: No. Romana
: Well, there's one loose on this ship, and they're terrified of it. It's like Biroc but horribly burned.
: That's funny. Adric
: What is it? Romana
: Those warp motors are HUGE - three times what they'd need for a ship THIS size.
: They asked me to stay on, you know, be a Decider. Romana
: You, a decider? Doctor Who
: Yes. I decided not to.
: Negative coordinates. Doctor Who
: Yes, that settles it. We're out of our own space and time, Romana. Romana
: Exo-Space! Doctor Who
: Yes. That thing we came through was a Charged Vacuum Emboitment. Romana
: A CVE. Doctor Who
: Hmm. One of the rarest space/time events in the universe.
: You are incredible. Doctor Who
: Well, yes, I suppose I am, really. I've never given it much thought.
: How long have things been like this? Kalmar
: Forever. The lords rule in the tower; the peasants toil in the fields. Nothing has changed in over a thousand years.
: Who are you? Romana
: Well, that's a very long story.
: Argolis? Tell me about it. Romana
: It's the first of the leisure planets. In relative Earth date 2250 there's a hideous war against some reptile people called the Foamasi. Most of the planet gets wiped out by 2000 interplanetary missiles, but the survivors build a recreation center called The Leisure Hive.
: They taught me at school how to stop my hearts. Tyssan
: Hearts? How many have you got? Romana
: One for casual, one for best.
: ...the Marshal almost went berserk at the thought you might be killed. Doctor Who
: He did? How very considerate of him.
: Have you ever experimented with time? Doctor Who
: Well, yes, but in a purely academic way of no interest to anyone. Mena
: Earth visitor Hardin thinks that you may be able to help with his experiments. Doctor Who
: Well, I'd like to... Romana
: Gallifrey abandoned tachyonics when we developed warp matrix engineering. Doctor Who
: Yes. There you are. So sorry.
: Soldeed? Seth
: Well, yes. The great scientist and engineer of Skonnos. It is he who built the complex for the Nimon. Teka
: They say he's the only scientist left on Skonnos. Romana
: Really? Why is that? Seth
: The great civil war. Only the army survived. Romana
] That sounds like a well organized war.
: [looking at the chambers aboard a 4000-year-old hyperspace ship
] Do you think there could be anything alive in any of these? Doctor Who
: What, after 4000 years, I shouldn't think so. I'll tell you something, if there is still anything alive, it'll be furious at all the delay.
: Names and dates of birth. Come on, come on. Romana
: Romana. Fisk
: Romana who? Doctor Who
: Will you please listen? Someone aboard this ship is smuggling drugs. Costa
: Name and date of birth. Doctor Who
: Well, how would I know? I don't even know who he is, yet. Costa
: YOUR name and date of birth. Doctor Who
: Oh. Oh, well. I'm called the Doctor. Date of birth - difficult to remember. Sometime soon I should think.
: Have you seen the Doctor? Phil Mitchell
: Yeah, Doctor Legg is the only doctor around here love. Romana
: Doctor who?
: According to article 3, subsection 1-3-5 of the legal code: we, the Megara, are not permitted to read the memory cells of any beings except when they are unable to present their evidence by reason of death, unconsciousness or natural stupidity. Romana
] Stop. I have new evidence. Doctor Who
: Too late. I've just been executed.
: Trafficing in drugs is punishable by death on Azure. Romana
: Whereas bureaucratic murder is rewarded with promotion. Fisk
: I didn't make the rules. I just enforce them.
[Fallen debris pins down the Doctor. Romana goes for help
: Don't go away, will you? The Doctor
: I rather hoped you'd resist the temptation to say that.
: Romana, you've got 2 minutes, 58 seconds to rebuild this machine. Romana
: What? This? Doctor Who
: Yes. Romana
: The CET? Doctor Who
: Yes. Romana
: Are you joking? Doctor Who
: Do I look as if I'm joking? Well? Romana
] Well... I'll need a screwdriver.
: We've got company. Doctor Who
[Sees Swampies approaching
] Doctor Who
: Well, you'd better introduce me. Romana
: As what? Doctor Who
: Oh, I don't know - as a wise and wonderful person who wants to help, don't exaggerate. Romana
: [clears throat
] This is, er... Ranquin
: Seize them. Doctor Who
: I told you not to exaggerate.
: We DO seem to be moving. Romana
: Very fast. Doctor Who
: Yes, but everything's off, except what's on, of course.
: They are VAMPIRES, Adric. Do you want to become one of them? Adric
: You said yourself you're on the menu. If it's a choice between that and joining the diners, I mean, there's no sense in TWO of us getting the chop.
: You sure you're all right, Romana? Romana
: I'm fine. Who are you?
: Oh, it's a sort of Holy Writ? The Doctor
: It's atrociously writ.
: Amazing bit of engineering. Doctor Who
: Yes, but for what purpose? Romana
: Only the Nimon knows that. Doctor Who
: Yes. I think it's about time someone else found out.
: The interior of the mines are fully automated. There is an ancient lift shaft, but nobody's used it in living memory. Romana
: Why not? Kimus
: The penalty is death. The Doctor
: Huh. I can see there wouldn't be much incentive.
: It's no good. Every time we try too... Romana
: [the histeratic loop begins again
] Oh, blast. Here we go again.
: Well, come on, old girl. There's quite a few millennia left in you yet. Romana
: Thank you, Doctor. Doctor Who
: Not you. The TARDIS.
: Doctor, the third segment... Doctor Who
: Yes. Romana
: The power to transform objects or at least their appearance... Doctor Who
: Yes. Romana
: Somebody's got it, and they found a way of utilizing its powers. Doctor Who
: Right. Romana
: Well, so what should we do? Doctor Who
: Get you a decent pair of shoes.