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] Radio disc jockey
: [on radio
] Hi, everybody, this is your Cousin Brucie. Whoa! Our summer romances are in full bloom, and everybody, but everybody's in love. So cousins, here's a great song from The Four Seasons. Baby
] That was the summer of 1963 - when everybody called me Baby, and it didn't occur to me to mind. That was before President Kennedy was shot, before the Beatles came, when I couldn't wait to join the Peace Corps, and I thought I'd never find a guy as great as my dad. That was the summer we went to Kellerman's.
: Me? I'm scared of everything. I'm scared of what I saw, I'm scared of what I did, of who I am, and most of all I'm scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I'm with you.
: I carried a watermelon.
[Johnny walks away
: [to herself
] Carried a watermelon?
: Who's that?
[they look over at Johnny and Penny dancing
] Neil Kellerman
: Oh, them. They're the dance people. They're here to keep the, uh, guests happy.
: [Watching Penny and Johnny dance
] You'd think they were a couple, wouldn't ya? Baby
: Well, aren't they? Billy Kostecki
: Naw, not since we were kids.
: Have you had many women? Johnny
: What? Baby
: Have you *had* many women? Johnny
: Baby, come on. Baby
: Tell me. I wanna know. Johnny
: No, no. Look, you've gotta understand what it's like, Baby. You come from the streets and suddenly you're up here, and these women, they are throwing themselves at ya, and they smell so good, and they really take care of themselves. I mean, I never knew women could be like that, you know? And they're so rich, they're so goddam rich, you think they must know about everything. And they're slipping their room keys in my hands, two and three times day, different women. So, here I think I'm scoring big, right? And for a while, you think, hey, they wouldn't be doing this if they didn't care about me, right? Baby
: That-that's alright, I understand. You were just using them, that's all. Johnny
: No, no that's not it. That's the thing, Baby, see it wasn't like that. They were using me.
: What's your real name, Baby? Baby
: Frances. For the first woman in the Cabinet.
: Frances. That's a real grown up name.
: I didn't blow a summer hauling toasted bagels just to bail out some little chick who probably balled every guy in the place.
[Baby is pouring water into glasses for him
] Robbie Gould
: A little precision please, Baby. Some people count and some people don't.
[brings out a copy of The Fountainhead from his pocket
] Robbie Gould
: Read it. I think it's a book you'll enjoy, but make sure you return it; I have notes in the margin. Baby
: You make me sick. Stay away from me, stay away from my sister or I'll have you fired.
[Baby pours the jug of water on his crotch
: Oh, yes, as a matter of fact it is. We're supposed to do the show in two days, you won't show me the lifts, I'm not sure of the turns, I'm doing all this to save your ass, what I really want to do is drop you on it!
: I have to say it. I'm known as the catch of the county. Baby
: I'm sure you are. Neil Kellerman
: But, last week, I took a girl from Jamie, the lifeguard. And he said to her, right in front of me, "What does he have that I don't have?" And she said, "Two hotels."
: Max, our Baby's gonna change the world. Max
: [to Lisa
] And what are you gonna do, missy? Baby
: Oh, Lisa's going to decorate it. Robbie Gould
: She already does.
: Oh, my God. Look at that! Ma, I should have brought those coral shoes. You said I was taking too much! Marjorie Houseman
: Well, sweetheart, you brought ten pairs. Lisa Houseman
: But the coral shoes match that dress! Jake Houseman
: This is not a tragedy. A tragedy is three men trapped in a mine, or police dogs used in Birmingham. Baby
: Monks burning themselves in protest. Lisa Houseman
: Butt out, Baby.
: I've decided to go all the way with Robbie. Baby
: Oh, Lisa, no. Not with someone like him. Lisa Houseman
: Do you think if we came back here for a our tenth anniversary, it would be free? Baby
: It-it's just wrong this way. It should be with someone - it should be with someone that you sort of love. Lisa Houseman
: Oh, come on. You don't care about me. You wouldn't care if I humped the entire army... as long as they were on the right side of the Ho Chi Minh Trail.
: [talking about Penny
] So what's wrong? What's the matter with her? Billy Kostecki
: She's knocked up, Baby. Johnny
: Billy! Baby
: [eyeing Johnny
] What's he gonna do about it? Johnny
] What's he gonna to do about it? Oh, it's *mine*, right? Right away you think it's *mine*.
: [talking about Neil
] That little wimp. He wouldn't know a new idea if it hit him in the Pachenga. He wanted some new ideas? I could've *told* him some new ideas! Baby
: Well, why did you let him talk to you that way? Johnny
: What do you mean, and fight the bossman? Baby
: Yeah, tell him your ideas! He's a person like everyone else. I'm sure he'll think they're great. Johnny
: Look, I know these people, Baby. They're all rich and they're mean. They won't listen to me. Baby
: Well, then why not fight harder? *Make* them listen? Johnny
: Because, I need this goddamn job lined up for next summer!
: My dad calls me today, he says - with good news - you know, he says, "Uncle Paul can finally get you in the union." Baby
: Oh, what-what union? Johnny
: The House Painters and Plasterers, local number 179, at your service.
[Baby's father, sister, and Robbie come out of the house next to the trail; Baby pulls Johnny down so they won't see them together
] Lisa Houseman
: I've been thinking a lot about the Domino Theory. Now, when Vietnam falls, is China next?
[the trio passes
: I don't think they saw us. Johnny
: [getting up
] Fight harder, huh? I don't see you fighting so hard, Baby. I don't see you running up to daddy telling him I'm your guy. Baby
: I will. With my father, it's complicated. I *will* tell him, I... Johnny
: I don't believe you, Baby! I don't think that you ever had any intention of telling him. Ever.
: I'll never be sorry. Baby
: Neither will I.
: [finding out the Schumacher's were guilty of stealing the wallets
] So then - so then it's all right! I knew it would work out. I knew they'd have to apologize... Johnny
: [shrugs her off
] I'm out, Baby. Baby
] They fired you anyway because of me. Johnny
] And if I leave quietly, I'll get my summer bonus. Baby
: So I did it for nothing. I hurt my family, you lost your job anyway, I did it for *nothing*! Johnny
: No, no, not for nothin', Baby! Nobody has ever done anything like that for me before. Baby
: You were right, Johnny. You can't win no matter what you do! Johnny
: You listen to me. I don't wanna hear that from you. *You* can! Baby
] I used to think so.