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Quotes for
Glenn Guglia (Character)
from The Wedding Singer (1998)

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The Wedding Singer (1998)
Glenn: This is a great idea. I'm glad you came around. You want to do some gambling and have some fun right away, or you just want to get married?

Robbie: Hey. I kissed her, but it didn't mean anything, I just brought her the jacket.
Glenn: Kissed who?
Holly: Oh, me.
Glenn: Who hasn't?

Robbie: [Glenn offers him a drink after Jason insults him] No, I'm not a big drinker.
Glenn: Well I am, how about an "Alabama Slammer"?
Glenn's buddy: Sounds like a plan.
Robbie: Yeah, go ahead, have a few drinks and, you know, drive home.

Glenn: [after punching Robbie] You know, you should write a song about this. You could call it "I got punched in the nose for sticking my face in other people's business".
[he and his friends walk off laughing]
Old man in bar: Sounds like a country song!

Robbie: I don't even know your last name.
Glenn: It's Guglia.
[says it Gulia]
Robbie: Guglia? Oh, so Julia's last name's gonna be Guglia. Julia Guglia! That's funny!
Glenn: [unamused] Why is that funny?
Robbie: I - don't know.

Julia: Hey, Glenn, do you mind if we switch seats so I sat in the window seat?
Glenn: Mmm. I hate the aisle seat. Every time that drink cart comes by it bangs me in the elbows.

Glenn: Who are you going out with?
Holly: Robbie.
Glenn: Oh good, that guy needs to get laid.
Holly: Excuse me! Just because he's going out with me doesn't mean he's going to get laid.
[Glenn and Julia look at her]
Holly: ... All right, he probably will.

Holly: God, I love David Bowie. He is SO sexy.
Glenn: You think the "time to make the donuts" guy is sexy.
Robbie: Heh heh, that guy is funny.

Glenn: Hey, asswipe, don't go snitching to Julia about this. I know you got a little crush on her, but you gotta face the facts: she'd rather go to bed with a REAL man. Not some poor singing orphan.
Robbie: All right, shithead. I haven't been in a fight since I was in the fifth grade, but I beat the shit out of that kid, so now I'm going to beat the shit out of you.
[Old guy throws a weak punch at Glenn and misses horribly]
Robbie: Hey, what are you doing, man?
Old Man in Bar: I'm sorry. I used to be much stronger.

Glenn: You better get out of my way, Billy, or you're gonna get hurt.

Robbie: [Robbie notices Julia's fiancee is flirting with another woman across the room, so he tries to provoke him to talk] That is a luscious ass right there isn't it? Mmm. My God.
Glenn: That's Grade A top choice meat!
Robbie: I'd like to bite right through that thing, arg! You know, chew on it.
[Glenn starts laughing in agreement]
Robbie: But we can't get chicks like that anymore. We're too old.
Glenn: Speak for yourself. I'm not too old. I can still get chicks like that.
Robbie: Not that hot though, right?
Glenn: Gotten hotter.
Robbie: Ten years ago!
Glenn: Try ten *days* ago.
Robbie: Really... As hot as that?
Glenn: Hotter, and younger.
Robbie: How do you do it, man? I mean how do you do it without getting caught?
Glenn: Julia's totally preoccupied with the wedding. She doesn't know what's going on.
Robbie: Oh man. You know what sucks though? Once you get married, the party's over, right?
Glenn: I work in the city, man. And I work long hours.