Maria Portokalos
Top Links
main detailsbiographyby votesphoto galleryquotes
by yearby typeby ratingsby votesby TV seriesby genreby keyword
Did You Know?
photo galleryquotes

Quotes for
Maria Portokalos (Character)
from My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)
Maria Portokalos: Nicko! Don't play with the food! When I was your age, we didn't have food!

Maria Portokalos: Toula, on my wedding night, my mother, she said to me, "Greek women, we may be lambs in the kitchen, but we are tigers in the bedroom."
Toula Portokalos: Eww. Please let that be the end of your speech.

Athena: I'm going to the Jewel. Listen, I'll get you some pantyhose.
Maria Portokalos: No queen size. They make me look fat.

Maria Portokalos: We must let Kosta think this was his idea.
Aunt Voula: All right, I know.
Maria Portokalos: That he came up with it.
Aunt Voula: All right.
Toula Portokalos: Ma, he's gonna figure it out.
Maria Portokalos: Don't you worry.
Aunt Voula: Okay, I know what to do you.
Maria Portokalos: You don't know what to do. You talk, talk, talk, all the time!
Aunt Voula: Do you want my help?
Maria Portokalos: Yes, I want your help!
Aunt Voula: Tell me what to say. But don't tell me what to say.
Maria Portokalos: Perfect!

Toula Portokalos: Ma, Dad is so stubborn. What he says goes. "Ah, the man is the head of the house!"
Maria Portokalos: Let me tell you something, Toula. The man is the head, but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants.

[upon receiving a bundt cake from Mrs. Miller]
Maria Portokalos: It's a cake! I know! Thank you! Thank you very, very much.
[whispering to Aunt Freida]
Maria Portokalos: There's a hole in this cake!

Maria Portokalos: Where did you go?
Nick Portokalos: Nowhere.
Maria Portokalos: What did you do?
Nick Portokalos: Nothing.
Maria Portokalos: Who did you see?
Nick Portokalos: No one.

Maria Portokalos: [angry] What is wrong with Toula going to school downtown?
Gus Portokalos: Is drugs downtown!
Maria Portokalos: What are you saying? Are you saying Toula will get involved with drugs?
Gus Portokalos: No. But somebody will say to her: take this bag down to the bus depot, and she'll do it!
Maria Portokalos: She is not stupid! She's smart!
Gus Portokalos: I know she's smart. So what for she needs more school? She's smart enough for a girl.
Maria Portokalos: [indignated] Oh! You think you're smarter than me, huh?
Gus Portokalos: No, I... I mean... You... you know...
Maria Portokalos: [angry] What? What you mean? I run the restaurant, I cook, I clean, I wash for you *and* I raise three kids *and* I teach Sunday school, you know? It's lucky for me I have you to tie my shoes!
Gus Portokalos: Maria!
[Maria leaves the room, slamming the door, and smiles at Toula]

Maria Portokalos: Ian, are you hungry?
Ian Miller: Uh no, I already ate.
Maria Portokalos: Okay, I make you something.

Maria Portokalos: I gave you life so that you could live it.

Maria Portokalos: [Gus is brooding in the family room and Maria has turned on all the lights] ENOUGH! ENOUGH!
[He gets up to leave]
Maria Portokalos: Don't you walk away from me! Sit down! Sit down!
[He sits on the couch]
Maria Portokalos: It's done! They fell in love!
Gus Portokalos: How could she do this to me?

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 (2016)
Maria: Remember, Paris, protect the poulaki - eyes open knees shut!
Aunt Voula: [to Maria] If your knees are open, shut your eyes.

Maria: Who says a woman has to be married?
Toula: You, all our lives.

Ian: Honey, by the way, we think you should go to college out of state.
Toula: Uh-huh.
Maria: What is that, reverse psychology?
[Smiles on Toula and Ian's face vanishes]
Athena: That never works.
Maria: That never works.
Paris: That never works.

Maria: Your father may be crazy, but at least I'm not a blood relative of his. YOU ARE. SORRY.

Maria: It's okay, Mrs. White.
[Mrs. White's dog barks. Portokalos dog barks back]
Mrs. White: [to Portokalos dog] Quiet! Sh-shhh! Stop! Quiet!
Maria: He doesn't speak english.
[to her dog in greek]
Maria: Bite her tomorrow.

"My Big Fat Greek Life: The Free Lunch (#1.4)" (2003)
Maria Portokalos: Nick, hurry up with that food! The man's got a gun!
[turns toward the customer, who is a police officer]
Maria Portokalos: I'm just pretending you're one of those loose cannon copss, like Burt Reynolds, may he rest in peace!
Nia Portokalos: Ma, he's still alive.
Maria Portokalos: Not really. Loni Anderson sucked the life right out of him!

"My Big Fat Greek Life: The Empire Strikes Back (#1.2)" (2003)
Maria Portokalos: Look, Gus, We started with nothing, and now we have so much. We have the house, the business...
Nia Portokalos: You have the above ground pool
Nia Portokalos: The above ground pool
Gus: You can see it when you fly from O'Hare!
Nia Portokalos: Which is why you should wear a swimsuit!