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Quotes for
Ramada Thompson (Character)
from Hot Shots! (1991)

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Hot Shots! (1991)
Topper Harley: Nice place.
Ramada Thompson: It's okay. The only problem is I have a nosy landlady. Well, I guess this is goodnight.
Topper Harley: I don't want to go back.
Ramada Thompson: You don't have to. I don't want to be alone. And by the way... I can go all night, like a lumberjack!
Topper Harley: What about your landlady?
Ramada Thompson: You can do her too.

Kent Gregory: That flying stunt today was pure madness. If there wasn't a lady present, I'd tear you apart like Christmas goose.
Topper Harley: Yeah? Well, keep it up, you'll be carrying your face home in a doggie bag.
Ramada Thompson: What is this macho thing?
Topper Harley: He started it.
Kent Gregory: Did not.
Topper Harley: Did too.
Kent Gregory: Did not.
Ramada Thompson: You're behaving like children.
Topper Harley: He's bein' a jerk.
Kent Gregory: Am not.
Topper Harley: Are too.
Kent Gregory: Am not.
Topper Harley: Are too too too too too too too too too too too...
Kent Gregory: Not not not not not not not not not...
Topper Harley: Are too times ten.
Kent Gregory: [Shoving Topper] That's it...

Topper Harley: Those are some long legs...
Ramada Thompson: I just had them lengthened. Now they go all the way up.

Topper Harley: So... I guess you've been with a man before...
Ramada Thompson: I'm a virgin. I'm just not very good at it.

Ramada Thompson: You were discharged from the service 18 months ago for willful insubordination. You disobeyed a direct order and lost a $13 million fighter in the process.
Topper Harley: Yes, I did. But I'm paying it off at ten bucks a week. And I wouldn't be doing that if I'd gotten that extra collision coverage.

Topper Harley: [Topper leans over her to press the button on the elevator and inhales] That's an interesting perfume.
Ramada Thompson: It's Vicks. I have a cold.

Ramada Thompson: The chafing dish is not yours.
Kent Gregory: Yes, it is.
Ramada Thompson: No, it isn't.
Kent Gregory: OK, I don't want it.
Ramada Thompson: Just take it.
Topper Harley: I'll take it.
Ramada Thompson: You stay out of it.

Topper Harley: I've fallen for you like a blind roofer.
Ramada Thompson: I'm sorry?
Topper Harley: My heart is falling down around my ankles like a wet pair of pants. My whole life, all I've wanted to do is fly. Bomb stuff. Shoot people down.

Ramada Thompson: What do you do with an elephant with 3 balls? Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

Ramada Thompson: Lieutenant, please. I'm talking to you as a psychiatrist. I'm recommending that you be grounded.
Topper Harley: You've got to be joking!
Ramada Thompson: Look, if I were joking, I would've said "what do you do with an elephant with three balls?"
[Topper shrugs, since he has no idea what the answer is]
Ramada Thompson: "You walk him and pitch to the rhino".
Topper Harley: You are serious.

Kent Gregory: Something's changed. It's not another woman, is it? I just couldn't compete with that.
Ramada Thompson: No, of course you couldn't.

[the session is over. Topper is about to step out of Ramada's office. He fails to notice there are exposed electric wires hanging from the ceiling]
Ramada Thompson: Be careful out there, lieutenant.
Topper Harley: Don't worry. I can take care of myself.
Ramada Thompson: [stands] No, you can't! You're going to get hurt!
Topper Harley: I don't need your help, I don't need anybody's help. I'll be just fine.
[Topper closes the door, walks right into the exposed wires, and gets electrocuted. His skeleton is seen through the door. Ramada steps outside her office, worried]
Ramada Thompson: Are you OK?
[Topper stands, tries to recover, his hair protuding to all directions. His head bumps against an exposed wire, and he nearly falls again]
Topper Harley: [pants] Yeah. I'm fine.

Ramada Thompson: Topper Harley, I presume.
Topper Harley: Once, perhaps. Now I am called Tu-ka Chinchilla.
Ramada Thompson: What does that mean?
[camera pans down to Topper's bunny slippers]
Topper Harley: Fluffy bunny feet.

[Topper returns to the reservation and, much to his surprise, finds Ramada there]
Topper Harley: Ramada!
Ramada Thompson: Once, perhaps. Now I am called Wah-Wah tukina.
Topper Harley: What does that mean?
Ramada Thompson: Little Sizzling Belly.

Hot Shots! Part Deux (1993)
Ramada Rodham Hayman: I had to come. It was a sequel.

Topper Harley: Ramada, I want to be with you. I want to hold you. I want to meet your parents and pet your dog...
Ramada Rodham Hayman: My parents are dead, Topper. My dog ate them.

Ramada Rodham Hayman: I'm married. I was married before you and I ever met. I'm still married today.
Topper Harley: You're joking.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: I'm not.
Topper Harley: You've got to be.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: If I was joking, I would say: "A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Why the long face?'"
Topper Harley: You are married.

Ramada Rodham Hayman: Topper, I was so young, just a schoolgirl. He was an older man, so wise in the ways of the world. He used to come around the schoolyard, day after day. I so admired his persistence. Even the restraining order my parents slapped on him was no deterrent. He opened my eyes to the arts: music, clog-dancing, WrestleMania. His work has meant so much to so many. And I owe him everything, Topper. Everything.
Topper Harley: I'm happy for you, kid. But if you think you can hurt me again, you're wrong. I left my heart in my other pants.

Michelle Rodham Huddleston: Oh, Ramada, how could you have been so blind? You always too wrapped up in being Miss Perfect College to notice me. Why should you concern yourself with the feelings of one insignificant roommate? One fabulous day, one incredible experience.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: I had no idea it meant so much to you.
[Col. Walters looks extremely fascinated by the women's conversation]
Michelle Rodham Huddleston: I remember that day as if it were yesterday. The exhilaration of experimenting, sharing something so new, so dangerous, so intimate.
Col. Denton Walters: [in a deep voice to Ramada] Go on.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: And I'll never forget the look on your face. The way the sweat glistened on your hard body.
[Col. Walters starts to sweat]
Ramada Rodham Hayman: Then you tied my ankles. Tighter. Tighter.
[Col. Walters, still sweating, motions for more from Ramada]
Ramada Rodham Hayman: But it just wasn't right. It wasn't natural.
[Col. Walters is about to pass out from listening to Ramada]
Ramada Rodham Hayman: Bungee-jumping is just too dangerous a sport.
Col. Denton Walters: [surprised] Bungee-jumping? That's it?

Topper Harley: We both know you belong with Dexter. You're part of his work, the thing that keeps him going. I'm no good at being noble, but... do you have any idea what would happen if you stay here with me?
Ramada Rodham Hayman: Of course I do. Sex. Wild, free, passionate, unbridled sex. I would fondle you in ways you can't imagine. I would pleasure you at any time, in any place, in any way, for as long as you could possibly desire.

Topper Harley: [after Ramada has been shot] For a moment there, I thought you were...
Ramada Rodham Hayman: Gabriella Sabatini? I get that all the time. It must be the nose.

Ramada Rodham Hayman: Dexter is one of the captives. He's my husband.
Topper Harley: You've got to be joking.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: If I was joking, I would say: "A rabbi, a priest and a minister walk into a bar..."
Topper Harley: Okay, okay, he is your husband.