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: Why are you dressed so scary? Cady
: It's Halloween.
: Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Nobles.
: And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it.
: And I'm sorry for repeating it now.
: There's a 30% chance that it's already raining!
: If you're from Africa, why are you white? Gretchen
: Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white.
: I gave him everything! I was half a virgin when I met him. Karen
: Do you wanna do something fun? Wanna go to taco bell? Regina
: I can't go to taco bell, I'm on an all-carb diet. GOD Karen you're so stupid!
[Regina leaves, Gretchen follows
: Wait, Regina! Talk to me! Regina
: No one understands me... Gretchen
: I understand you!
[Regina & Gretchen's voices fade out
: You're not stupid, Karen. Karen
: No, I am actually. I'm failing almost everything! Cady
: Well... there must be something you're good at. Karen
: I can stick my whole fist in my mouth! Wanna see? Cady
: No no no... Anything else? Karen
: Well... I'm kinda psychic. I have a fifth sense. Cady
: What do you mean? Karen
: It's like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it's going to rain. Cady
: Really? That's amazing. Karen
: Well... they can tell when it's raining.
: [thinks she flashed over
] Oh my god, she's so annoying. Gretchen
: Who is? Karen
: Who's this? Gretchen
: Gretchen... Karen
: Right... hold on.
[Karen flashes over
: Oh my god, she's so annoying.
: [reading from the Burn Book
] Trang Pak is a grotsky, little byotch. Regina
: Still true. Gretchen
: Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin. Regina
: Still half-true. Karen
: Amber D'Alessio . She made out with a hot dog. Gretchen
: Janis Ian-DYKE. Karen
: [pointing to Damien in background of picture
] Hey, who is that? Gretchen
: I think it's that kid, Damien. Cady
: Yeah, he's almost too gay to function.
[Karen & Gretchen chuckle
: That's funny, put that in there.
[trying to avoid plans with Regina
: I can't go out.
[faux coughs softly
: I'm sick. Regina
: Boo, you whore!
[Gretchen arrives at Karen's house, dressed in a cat suit with cat ears. Karen's in a skimpy short dress
: What are you supposed to be?
[Points to her headband
: I'm a MOUSE. DUH.
: God. My hips are huge! Gretchen
: Oh please. I hate my calves. Regina
: At least you guys can wear halters. I've got man shoulders. Cady
] I used to think there was just fat and skinny. But apparently there's lots of things that can be wrong on your body. Gretchen
: My hairline is so weird. Regina
: My pores are huge. Karen
: My nail beds suck.
[pause. All look at Cady
: I have really bad breath in the morning. Karen
: On Wednesdays we wear pink!
: You know who's looking fine tonight? Seth Mosakowski. Gretchen
: Okay, you did not just say that. Karen
: What? He's a good kisser. Gretchen
: He's your cousin. Karen
: Yeah, but he's my first cousin. Gretchen
: Right. Karen
: So, you have your cousins, and then you have your first cousins, and then you have your second cousins... Gretchen
: No, honey, uh-uh. Karen
: That's not right, is it? Gretchen
: That is so not right.
: I think I'm joining the Mathletes. Regina
: No! No, no! Regina
: You cannot do that. That is social suicide. *Damn*! You are so lucky you have us to guide you.
: Regina, we have to talk to you. Regina
: Is butter a carb? Cady
] YES. Gretchen
: Regina, you're wearing sweatpants. It's Monday. Regina
: So...? Karen
: So that's against the rules, and you can't sit with us. Regina
: Whatever. Those rules aren't real. Karen
: They were real that day I wore a vest! Regina
: Because that vest was disgusting! Gretchen
: You can't sit with us! Regina
] These sweatpants are all that fits me right now. Regina
: [after being ignored
] Fine! You can walk home, bitches.
: I think tonight might be the night with Jason. Karen
: What are you talking about? You've already slept with him Gretchen Wieners
] Yeah but tonight's night i like it.
: We do not have a clique problem at this school. Gretchen
: But you do have to watch out for "frenemies". Regina
: What are "frenemies"? Gretchen
: Frenemies are enemies who act like friends. We call them "frenemies". Karen
: Or "enemends". Gretchen
: Or friends who secretly hate you, we call them "fraitors". Regina
: [rolls eyes
] That is so gay. Karen
] What if we called them "mean-em-aitors"? Regina
: No, honey, it has to have the word "friend" in it. Karen
: [after being dumped by Aaron, Regina is crying and holding hands with Gretchen and Karen in her bedroom
] Did he say why? Regina
] Somebody told him about Shane Oman. Karen
: Who? Regina
: He said some guy on the baseball team. Karen
: Baseball team? Regina
: I gave him EVERYTHING. I was half a virgin when I met him! Karen
: You want to do something fun?
: You want to go to Taco Bell? Regina
: I CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL, I'M ON AN ALL-CARB DIET. God, Karen, you are SO stupid!
: Growing up female in this world is not easy. In China, baby girls are routinely put up for adoption. And in parts of Africa, women are still made to live in tents during the time of their menses. Karen
: Ew! Gretchen
: And even in fancy countries like the United States and England, seven out of ten girls have a negative body image. Regina George
: Who cares? Six of those girls are right!
: It's called the South Beach Fat Flush and all you drink is cranberry juice for 72 hours. Aaron Samuels
: Lemme see that... this isn't even cranberry juice, it's cranberry juice cocktail. It's all sugar. Regina George
: I wanna lose three pounds. Karen
: Oh my God, you're so skinny! Regina George
: Shut up.