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: Oh, Janie Jane! What an amazing discovery! A man with no language, no human behavior... Jane Porter
: And no respect for personal boundaries. Professor Porter
: How do you mean? Jane Porter
: [gets extremely close to Professor Porter
] He was this close to me, daddy, just staring at me.
[Goes back to blackboard and finishes drawing of Tarzan
] Jane Porter
: He was confused at first, as if he had never seen another human before. His eyes were intense... and focused, and... I've never seen eyes like those before. Professor Porter
: Oh. Shall I - ahem - leave you and the blackboard alone for a moment? Jane Porter
: Oh, daddy, stop it.
: Oh, Tarzan, you have no idea what's in store for you. You're going to see the world, and all kinds of people will want to meet you. Leaders, scientists, writers. Professor Porter
: Yes, Darwin and Kipling. Queen Victoria! Jane Porter
: I haven't met her, but I hear she's awfully nice.
: Oh, those magnificent creatures, shivering in cages. What is this world coming to?
[He hits his fist on the wall; suddenly the ship shifts to the side, from Tantor getting on board
] Professor Porter
: Oh, by Jove. Don't know my own strength.
: Looks like a man but walks like an ape. He could be the missing link! Clayton
: Or our link to the gorillas.
: [after telling Jane to stay with Tarzan
] What am I doing? Captain! Tell them you never found us! After all, people get lost in the jungle all the time!
[jumps out of the boat
: [Describing how Tarzan walks
] He bent his elbows out, and he walked like this. Professor Porter
: Oh, I see! Just like Aunt Isabel.
: And there were gorillas. Professor Porter
: Gorillas? Clayton
: You found the gorillas? Where, Jane? Where? Jane Porter
: He left with them. Professor Porter
: Who did? Who? Jane Porter
: Tarzan. Clayton
: Tarzan? Jane Porter
: The ape man.
: [Draws a crude gorilla on Jane's chalkboard and points to it with the chalk
] Gorilla. Tarzan
: [Takes the chalk and examines it
] Gor-illa. Professor Porter
] Oh! Oh! He's got it! Tarzan
[Proceeds to scribble wildly on the chalkboard
: Gorrrrr-illllla! Professor Porter
: Oh, perhaps not...
[after being returned to camp by Tarzan
] Jane Porter
: Oh, my goodness! Daddy, I was walking. There was... was a little baby, little baby monkey, and I drew a picture! Professor Porter
: Yes, go on. Jane Porter
: Suddenly, the monkey starts crying. Professor Porter
: Oh, poor thing. Jane Porter
: But, I turn around and there's a whole FLEET OF THEM. An ARMY of monkeys! A huge tree full of monkeys, screaming at me!
[imitates a monkey screaming at him
] Professor Porter
: [laughing at her
] That's theropithecus baboonus! She's very good at this! Jane Porter
: Terrified! I was terrified! Suddenly, I was swinging, on a vine, in the air! Swinging, in the air! Professor Porter
: With the monkeys! Jane Porter
: I was in the air! And then, I was all surrounded! Professor Porter
: What did you do? Jane Porter
: And, Daddy! They took my boot! Professor Porter
: Your boot - those are the ones I bought you. Jane Porter
: And I was SAVED. I was saved by a flying, wild man in a loincloth. Professor Porter
: Loincloth? Good Lord. Clayton
: What is she talking about? Professor Porter
: I haven't the foggiest idea. Takes after her mother, you know. She came up with stories like that. Not about men in loincloths, of course.
: And that's all you know about this current weirdo? Jane Porter
: He's not a current weirdo Tarzan
: Ah, I see. He's just ah, Tarzan of the Apes? Who escaped from a detention center and is looking for his lost chimp, Chiquita? Jane Porter
: Cheetah Archimedes Porter
: I see. Jane, look, I never interfere in your personal life, do I? Jane Porter
: Since when? Archimedes Porter
: Yeah but I'm telling you - this guy is a loser Archimedes Porter
: Hey, come here for a minute. You got twenty four hours to get out of town. That's it Archimedes Porter
: No Wait, no Dad you can't do that Archimedes Porter
: Why can't I do that? I run a business, a security business. I could lose my license. This guy is a fugitive from justice. And also a nutcase. Archimedes Porter
: I gotta go. It was great coffee. Pleasure meeting you. Get outta my daughter's life. And put on some clothes.