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: You know what they say about men with big feet. William
: No, I don't, actually. What's that? Anna Scott
: Big feet... large shoes.
[who will get the last brownie?
] Anna Scott
: Wait, what about me? Max
: Sorry, you think *you* deserve the brownie? Anna Scott
: Well a shot at it at least huh? William
: Well, you'll have to fight me for it, this is a very good brownie. Anna Scott
: I've been on a diet every day since I was nineteen, which basically means I've been hungry for a decade. I've had a series of not nice boyfriends, one of whom hit me. Ah, and every time I get my heart broken, the newspapers splash it about as though it's entertainment. And it's taken two rather painful operations to get me looking like this. Honey
: Really? Anna Scott
: Really. And, one day not long from now, my looks will go, they will discover I can't act and I will become some sad middle-aged woman who looks a bit like someone who was famous for a while. Max
: [long pause
] Nah, nice try gorgeous, but you don't fool anyone. William
: Pathetic effort to hog the brownie.
: And don't forget... I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
: Dominic... if you'd like to ask your question again? Journalist
: Yes. Anna, how long are you intending to stay here in Britain? Anna Scott
: Just going to the kitchen to get some food, then I'm going to tell you a story that will make your balls shrink to the size of raisins.
[leaves corridor for kitchen
] Anna Scott
: Probably best not tell anyone about this. William
: Right, no one. I mean, I'll tell myself sometimes but - don't worry - I won't believe it.
: I enjoyed the movie very much. I was just wondering, did you ever consider having more horses in it? Anna Scott
: Well, we would have liked to. But it was difficult, obviously, being set in space.
: Whoopsidaisies! Anna Scott
: What did you say? William
: Nothing. Anna Scott
: Yes you did. William
: No I didn't. Anna Scott
: You said "whoopsidaisies". William
: I don't think so. No one says "whoopsidaisies" do they? Unless they're... Anna Scott
: There *is* no "unless." No one has said "whoopsidaisies" for fifty years and even then it was only little girls with blonde ringlets. William
: Exactly. Here we go again.
[He falls off the fence again
: Whoopsidaisies. It's a disease I've got. It's a clinical thing. I'm taking pills and having injections. It won't last long.
: Can I stay for a while? William
: You can stay forever.
: I live in Notting Hill. You live in Beverly Hills. Everyone in the world knows who you are, my mother has trouble remembering my name. Anna Scott
: I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
: I can't believe you have that picture on your wall. William
: You like Chagall? Anna Scott
: I do. It feels like how being in love should be. Floating through a dark blue sky. William
: With a goat playing the violin. Anna Scott
: Yes - happiness isn't happiness without a violin-playing goat.
: Rita Hayworth used to say, "They go to bed with Gilda; they wake up with me." William
: Who's Gilda? Anna Scott
: Her most famous part. Men went to bed with the dream; they didn't like it when they would wake up with the reality. Do you feel that way? William
: You are lovelier this morning than you have ever been.
: "For June who loved this garden from Joseph who always sat beside her." Some people do spend their whole lives together.
: [leaving the restaurant after challenging the loud guys
] I'm sorry. Anna Scott
: No, I love that you tried. Time was I'd have done the same thing. In fact...
[turns back and walks up to the loud table
] Anna Scott
: Hi. Loud Man in Restaurant
: Oh. My. God. Anna Scott
: I just wanted to apologize for my friend - he's very sensitive. Loud Man in Restaurant
: No, I mean... Anna Scott
: No, leave it. I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, I'm sure it was just friendly banter, I'm sure you guys have dicks the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner, the tuna's really good.
: So who left who? William
: She left me. Anna Scott
: Why? William
: She saw through me. Anna Scott
: Uh oh. That's not good.
: So how is he? Anna Scott
: I don't know. It just got to the point where I couldn't remember any of the reasons why we were together.
: Sorry about the "surreal but nice" comment. Anna Scott
: Don't worry, I thought the whole apricot honey thing was the real low point.
: Would you like a cup of tea before you go? Anna Scott
: No. William
: Orange juice? No, probably not... something else cold? Coke? Water? Some disgusting sugary drink pretending to have something to do with fruits of the forest? Anna Scott
: No. William
: Do you... always say no to everything? Anna Scott
: What's so annoying is now I'm so totally fierce when it comes to nudity clauses. William
: You have clauses in your contract? Anna Scott
: Yeah. "you may show the dent at the top of the artist's buttocks, but neither cheek or if a stunt bottom is being used, artists must have full consultation". William
: You have a stunt bottom? Anna Scott
: I *could* have a stunt bottom, yes. William
: Are people tempted to go for better bottoms than their own? Anna Scott
: Well yeah, I would. This is important stuff. William
: Hell of a thing to put on your passport, Occupation "Mel Gibson's bottom" Anna Scott
: Actually Mel does his own ass work. Well why wouldn't he.
: God that's an enormous arse. Anna Scott
: I'm not listening. Anna's Co-Star
: Not honestly, it's so sad, all those anorexic girls. She has enough to share around and still be big bottomed. Anna Scott
: I would think looking at something that nice, you and your bony little excuse for an arse would be well advised to keep quiet.
: What do you think? William
: Gripping. It's not Jane Austen, it's not Henry James but it's gripping. Anna Scott
: You think I should do Henry James? William
: I think you'd be wonderful in Henry James but this writer - writers, they're pretty good too. Anna Scott
: You never get anyone in "Wings of a Dove" saying "Inform the Pentagon we need black star cover!" William
: And for me the book is the poorer for it.
: What's the pay like in movies? I mean. Last movie. How much did you get paid? Anna Scott
: 15 million dollars.
: Calm down, have a cup of tea. Anna Scott
: No! I don't want any goddamn tea!
: Oh really? So the entire British press got up this morning and said, "I know where Anna Scott is, she's in that house with the blue door, in Notting Hill." And then you go out, in your goddamn underwear... Spike
: [walks in
] I went out in my goddamn underwear too.
: Busy tomorrow? William
: I thought you were leaving tomorrow? Anna Scott
: I was.
: Please, sod off. Anna Scott
: Ok. William
: No, no, no! I thought you were someone else. I mean I thought you were Spike, but I'm thrilled you're not.
: What is it about men and nudity? Particularly breasts? How can you be so interested in them? William
: Well... Anna Scott
: But, but, seriously: they're just breasts. Every second person in the world has them. William
: Oh, more than that, when you think about it: you know, Meat Loaf has a very nice pair. Anna Scott
] But they're... they're odd looking, they're for milk, your mother has them, you've seen a thousand of them... What's all the fuss about? William
: Actually, I can't think of what it is, really. Let me just have a quick look...
[peeks under blanket
: No, no, beats me.
: [about Anna's new film project
] Any horses in that one? Or hounds for that matter; our readers are intrigued by both species. Anna Scott
] It takes place on a submarine.
: [they arrive at her hotel at the end of their date
] Do you wanna come up? William
: Well, there seem to be lots of reasons why I shouldn't. Anna Scott
: [nods her head in understanding and pauses
] Do you wanna come up?
] Anna Scott
: Give me five minutes?
: Next question? Yes. You in the pink shirt. William
: Uh, right. Miss Scott, are there any circumstances that you and he might be more than just friends. Anna Scott
: I hoped that there would be but I've been assured that there's not. William
: Yes, but what if... P.R. Chief
: I'm sorry. Just the one question. Anna Scott
: No. It's alright. You were saying? William
: I was just wondering what if this person... Journalist
: Thacker. His name is Thacker. William
: Right. Thanks. What if, uh, Mr. Thacker realized that he had been a daft prick and got down on his knees and begged you to reconsider if you would... indeed... reconsider. Anna Scott
] Yes. I believe I would. William
: That's wonderful news. The readers of Horse and Hound will be relieved.