Detective Keith Frazier
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Quotes for
Detective Keith Frazier (Character)
from Inside Man (2006)

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Inside Man (2006)
Det. Bill Mitchell: Hey Keith, let me see your shoe.
Keith Frazier: What?
Det. Bill Mitchell: Lemme see your shoe.
Keith Frazier: Why?
Det. Bill Mitchell: 'Cause I have never seen anyone put their foot that far up a guy's ass.
Keith Frazier: [Busts out laughing] Yeah, I guess I did, didn't I?
Det. Bill Mitchell: Man, you cut him an ass the length of the Lincoln Tunnel! We're gonna need a traffic cop on that shit!

Keith Frazier: Sorry to interrupt you, Mister Mayor, but there's an old American saying: When there's blood on the streets, somebody's gotta go to jail.

Vikram Walia: Fuckin' tired of this shit. What happened to my fuckin' civil rights? Why can't I go anywhere without being harassed? Get thrown out a bank, I'm a hostage, I get harassed. I go to the airport, I can't go through security without a random selection. Fuckin' random, my ass.
Keith Frazier: I bet you can get a cab though.
Vikram Walia: I guess that's one of the perks.

Keith Frazier: Let's just try to keep everybody calm, okay?
Dalton Russell: Don't I sound calm to you?
Keith Frazier: Yeah, you do.

[from trailer]
Det. Bill Mitchell: You gotta be crazy to go in there.
Keith Frazier: Like a fox.

Keith Frazier: Who ever heard of a bank robbers escaping on a plane with fifty hostages? You've seen Dog Day Afternoon! You're stalling! Why? I don't know.

Madeliene White: Well detective, there are matters at stake here that are a little bit above your pay grade. No offense.
Keith Frazier: Well, why don't you just tell the mayor to raise my pay grade to the proper level, and problem solved.

Keith Frazier: What are you doing? This ain't no bank robbery!

Keith Frazier: You got a card, in case I need to call you?
Madeliene White: [smiles sweetly] Please don't take this personally, but no. I don't think you can afford me.
Keith Frazier: Well, don't take this personally, Miss White. Kiss my black ass, okay?
Madeliene White: Careful, Detective. My bite is much worse than my bark.

Keith Frazier: Oh, please, do not say proposals... my girlfriend... she wants a proposal from me.
Dalton Russell: You think you're too young to get married?
Keith Frazier: No, I'm not too young... too broke. Maybe I should rob a bank.
Dalton Russell: Do you love each other?
Keith Frazier: Yeah, yeah, we do.
Dalton Russell: Then money shouldn't really matter.
Keith Frazier: Thank you, bank robber!

Dalton Russell: You're too fucking smart to be a cop.
[He points a gun at Frazier]
Dalton Russell: Now get the fuck out of here.
Keith Frazier: What? You gonna shoot me? Go ahead, shit, you got nothing to lose, I damn sure got nothing to lose, so go ahead, shoot me. Shoot me.
Dalton Russell: [pause] Fuck you. Tell them to send someone sane over here.

Four Seasons Maitre d': Good afternoon, sir. Do you have a reservation?
Keith Frazier: [walking past him] Looking for the mayor.
Four Seasons Maitre d': May I have your hat, please?
Keith Frazier: No, you cannot! Get your own.

Det. Bill Mitchell: You see, there's just you and one other woman that fit the physical description of the female suspect.
Stevie: What's that?
Det. Bill Mitchell: It's your height, your age, and... um...
Keith Frazier: Your cup size.
Stevie: [smiles sardonically] So, I violated section 34 Double-D? That's what you're telling me?

Dalton Russell: This time next week, I'll be sucking down piña coladas in a hot tub with six girls named Amber and Tiffany.
Keith Frazier: More like taking a shower with two guys named Jamal and Jesus, if you know what I mean. And here's the bad news: that thing you're sucking on? It's not a piña colada!

Keith Frazier: Last time I had my johnson pulled this good it cost me five bucks.
Captain John Darius: Five bucks?
Keith Frazier: It was Tiajuana. Don't ask.

Keith Frazier: Alright, I've got them right where I want 'em.
Det. Bill Mitchell: Where's that?
Keith Frazier: Right behind me with my pants around my ankles, but it's a start.

Keith Frazier: C'mon let's go down the street to the bar. I'll buy you a drink
Dalton Russell: Thanks but I'm trying to stay away from bars right now if you know what I mean.

Keith Frazier: You planned every inch of this thing right from the start, you got everybody marching to your beat, including me, and i'm through buying it!

Sylvia: Did you bring Big Willy?
Keith Frazier: Yeah and the Twins!

[Inside the "war room" van, Detective Keith Frazier finally accepts a call from Dalton Russell]
Dalton Russell: I got a question for ya. You get it right, I give you more time.
Keith Frazier: And?
Dalton Russell: You know what happens if you don't. Which weighs more: all the trains that pass through Grand Central Station in a year - or the trees cut down to print all U.S. currency in circulation? Here's a hint. It's a trick question.
[they both hang up]
Keith Frazier: What the hell was that? Playing games, now?
Captain John Darius: [realizing] It's the trains. U.S. money isn't printed on paper at all. It's cotton.
Mobile Command Officer Berk: Yeah, that's, that's right.
Captain John Darius: No trees were cut down.
Mobile Command Officer Rourke: Are you sure?
Captain John Darius: Yeah. One hundred percent.
Keith Frazier: Okay.
[He dials Dalton's number again. The phone rings. Dalton picks it up]
Keith Frazier: I got it.
Det. Bill Mitchell: Wait a second, wait a second.
Keith Frazier: Call you back.
[Both Frazier and Dalton hang up their phones]
Det. Bill Mitchell: It's a trap. They both weigh the same. Tell him they both weigh the same. They both weigh nothing.
Keith Frazier: They both weigh nothing or they both weigh the same?
Det. Bill Mitchell: Tell him they both weigh the same. Tell him they both weigh the same. Do it now.
Keith Frazier: They both weigh the same. Got it.
[Dalton picks up the phone]
Dalton Russell: Well?
Keith Frazier: They both weigh the same.
Dalton Russell: [with evil nonchalance] This time, send sandwiches.

[They are discussing Dalton Russell]
Keith Frazier: What do you think he's going to do?
Madeliene White: Well, he's not gonna kill anyone.
Keith Frazier: How do you know?
Madeliene White: Because he's not a murderer.
Keith Frazier: How do you know? I got news for you. Most of the guys up in Sing Sing weren't murderers until they killed somebody.