Lumiere
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Quotes for
Lumiere (Character)
from Beauty and the Beast (1991)

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Beauty and the Beast (1991)
Beast: I want to do something for her... but what?
Cogsworth: Well, there's the usual things: flowers... chocolates... promises you don't intend to keep...
Lumiere: No, no! It's got to be more something more special than that!

Beast: [pounds on Belle's door yelling] I thought I told you to come down to dinner!
Belle: I'm not hungry!
Beast: [yelling to Belle] You'll come out, or I'll-I'll-I'll break down the door!
Lumiere: Master, I could be wrong, but that might not be the best way to win the girl's affections.
Cogsworth: Please. Attempt to be a gentlemen.
Beast: But, she's being so *difficult*!
Mrs. Potts: Gently... gently...
Beast: [calmly] Will you come down to dinner?
Belle: No!
Beast: [points at door] Hmm?
Cogsworth: Ah-ah-ah, suave, genteel.
Beast: [suavely] It would give me great pleasure...
[tries to hold in his anger]
Beast: if you would join me for dinner.
Cogsworth: [clears throat and mutters] We say please.
Beast: Please?
Belle: No, thank you!
Beast: [yells] You can't stay in there forever!
Belle: Yes, I can!
Beast: [yells] Fine! Then go ahead and *starve!* If she doesn't eat with me, then she doesn't eat at all!
[storms down through the hallway and slams the door behind him]
Mrs. Potts: Oh dear. That didn't go very well at all, did it?

Lumiere: [trying to prepare the Beast for his dinner with Belle] Voila! Oh, you look so... so...
Beast: [fur done up in curls and bows] Stupid.
Lumiere: Not quite the word I was looking for, but perhaps a - little more off the top.
Cogsworth: [Clears throat] Your lady awaits.

Cogsworth: Couldn't keep quiet, could we? Just had to invite him to stay, didn't we?
[imitates Lumiere]
Cogsworth: 'Serve him tea. Sit in the master's chair. Pet the pooch!'
Lumiere: I was trying to be hospitable.

Lumiere: Ma chère mademoiselle. It is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight. And now, we invite to relax, let us pull up a chair, as the dining room proudly presents... your dinner.

Beast: Oh, it's no use. She's so beautiful, and I'm... Well, look at me!
Mrs. Potts: Oh, must help her to see past all that.
Beast: I don't know how.
Mrs. Potts: Well, you can start by making yourself more presentable. Straighten up. Try to act like a gentleman.
[Beast stands up straighter]
Lumiere: Ah, yes. When she comes in give her a dashing, debonair smile. Come, come, show me the smile.
[Beast gives a big, forced smile]
Mrs. Potts: But don't frighten the poor girl!

Cogsworth: [shakes Lumiere's hand in truce] Well, Lumiere, old friend. Shall we let bygones be bygones?
Lumiere: Of course, mon ami. I told you she would break the spell!
Cogsworth: I beg your pardon, old friend, but I believe *I* told *you*.
Lumiere: No, you didn't. *I* told *you*!
Cogsworth: You most certainly did not, you pompous, paraffin-headed peabrain!
Lumiere: En garde, you... you overgrown pocket watch!

Mrs. Potts: Pardon me, Master...
Beast: Leave me in peace.
Mrs. Potts: But sir, the castle is under attack!
Villagers: [singing outside and trying to knock the door down] Kill the Beast! Kill the Beast!
Lumiere: [All the objects are trying to hold the door closed] This isn't working.
Featherduster: Oh Lumiere. We must do *something*.
Lumiere: Wait, I know!
Villagers: [Still singing outside] Kill the Beast! Kill the Beast!
Mrs. Potts: What should we do, Master?
Beast: It doesn't matter now. Just let them come.

[giving Beast advice on how to impress Belle]
Lumiere: Impress her with your rapier wit.
Mrs. Potts: But be gentle.
Lumiere: Shower her with compliments.
Mrs. Potts: But be sincere.
Lumiere: And above all...
Mrs. Potts, Lumiere: You must control your temper!

Lumiere: Master...
Beast: [growling softly] What?
Lumiere: Since the girl is going to be with us for quite some time, I was just thinking - you might want to offer her a more comfortable room.
Beast: [growls, then walks past]
Lumiere: Then again, maybe not!

Lumiere: Be... our... guest, be our guest, put our service to the test / Tie your napkin round your waist, cheri, and let us provide the rest / Soup du jour? Hors d'oeuvres? Why, we only live to serve / Try the gray stuff, it's delicious! Don't believe me? Ask the dishes! / They can sing, they can dance, after all, Miss, this is France / And a dinner here is never second best / Come on, unfold our menu, / Take a glance and then you / will be our guest / Oui, our guest, Be our guest!
Lumiere: [Chorus joins in] Beef ragoune, cheese soufflé, pie and pudding en flambé / We'll prepare and serve with flair, a culinary cabaret / You're alone and you're scared, but the banquet's all prepared / No one's gloomy or complaining, while the flatware's entertaining / We tell jokes, I do tricks, with my fellow candlesticks / And it's all in perfect taste, that you can bet! / Come on and fill your glass / You've won your own free pass / To be our guest / If you're stressed, it's fine dining we suggest! Be our guest, be our guest, be our guest!
Lumiere: Life is so unnerving, for a servant who's not serving / He's not whole, without a soul, to wait upon! Ah, those good old days when we were useful... suddenly those good old days are gone / Ten years we've been rusting, needing so much more than dusting / Needing exercise, a chance to use our skill! / Most days, we just lay around the castle / Flabby fat and lazy, then you walked in and oops-a-daisy!
Mrs. Potts: It's a guest! It's a guest! Sakes alive and I'll be blessed! / Wine's been poured, and thank the Lord I've had the napkins freshly pressed / With dessert, she'll want tea, and my dear, that's fine with me / While the cups do their soft-shoeing I'll be bubbling, I'll be brewing / I'll get warm, piping hot... Heaven's sakes, is that a spot? / Clean it up! We want the company impressed! / We've got a lot to do! / Is it one lump or two? / For our guest! She's our guest!
Chorus: Be our guest! Be our guest! Our command is your request! / It's been ten years since we had anybody here, and we're obsessed! / With your meal, with your ease, yes indeed, we aim to please / While the candlelight's still glowing, let us help you, we'll keep going...
Lumiere, Chorus, Mrs. Potts: Course by course! One by one! / Till you shout "Enough! I'm done!" / And we send you off to sleep as you digest! / Tonight, you'll prop your feet up / But for now let's eat up / Be our guest! Be our guest! Be our guest! Please be our guest!


Beauty and the Beast (2017)
[from sneak peak trailer]
[off-screen]
Lumiere: Look, a girl!
Cogsworth: Yes, I can see it's a girl, you fool!
Lumiere: What if she is the one?

[from trailer]
[to the Beast and Cogsworth about Belle]
Lumiere: Look at her! What if she's the one?
[the Beast sighs in frustration]
Lumiere: The one who will break the spell?

Lumiere: [from trailer] 'Allo!
Belle: [stunned] You can talk?
Cogsworth: Well, of course he can *talk*!

[from TV spot]
[to the Beast]
Lumiere: You must charm her! Be gentle!
Mrs. Potts: ...kind!
Cogsworth: ...sweet!
Lumiere: Come, come. Show me the smile!
[the Beast gives a wide smile, bearing his monstrous teeth]
Mrs. Potts: [Lumiere, Cogsworth, Mrs. Potts and Featherduster all react] Ooh, dear!
Cogsworth: Oh, my!

Lumiere: [from trailer] Look, a girl!
Belle: Who said that?
Lumiere: 'Ello!
Belle: [gasps and steps back] You can talk!
Cogsworth: Well, of course! It's all he ever does!

[from trailer]
[to Lumiere]
Belle: What happens when the last petal falls?
Lumiere: The master remains a beast forever...
Cogsworth: ...and we become antiques!

[from trailer]
[to the Beast]
Lumiere: If she is the one who'll break the spell, you must finally learn to love...


Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas (1997) (V)
Lumiere: And you said it was impossible!
Angelique: No, no, no. I said it was impossible without - *me*.

Lumiere: [Beast glumly walks away as Lumiere sees the present that Belle left for him] Oooooh, it's for you, Master. It's from - a girl.
Beast: [Looking back] Mrs. Potts?
Lumiere: [Irate] No, from Belle!
Beast: Belle?
[Beast prepares to open the present but Lumiere stops him]
Lumiere: Ah-ah-ah, Master, you can't open it!
Beast: Why not? It's for me, isn't it?
Lumiere: Because it's not yet Christmas.
[Beast turns away in a huff]
Lumiere: Master, we all understand how you feel about Christmas. But when a woman gives a man a gift, she's saying, "I care about you."
Beast: But I don't have a gift for her.
Lumiere: It's not too late.
Beast: [huffs again] Well, I guess I'll get her a little something.

Belle: [singing] You belong side by side, you should never be apart, 'cause when you're both together, you're really twice as smart.
Cogsworth: [spoken] Twice as smart... she does have a point.
Lumiere: Yes. Well, two heads are better than one.

Lumiere: [as he rides on Cogsworth down a hill to catch up with Belle, who is getting a Christmas tree] Ha-ho! Faster, faster! I think we've finally found a use for you: clock boarding; no, snow clocking! Whatever! Ha-ha!

Chip: Hi, Belle.
Belle: [chuckling briefly] Hello! Chip, do you know what day it is?
Chip: Well, it's not Tuesday...
Belle: No, silly. Today is December 24th. The day before Christmas.
Lumiere: And what a beautiful day it is.


"Robot Chicken: Some Like It Hitman (#5.14)" (2011)
Lumiere: So you're dining with a beast / That doesn't mean you shouldn't feast!
Cogsworth: Let us handle reservations / Give your taste buds a sensation!
Chamberpot: Have your fill, eat more still / There's no need to slow your pace / After dinner, you'll be thinner / once you sit down on my face!
Lumiere: Who's for seconds?
Chamberpot: Eat a lot / then come meet your chamberpot...
Lumiere: We are trying to serve dinner!
Chamberpot: What, DeFicacci doesn't get to sing along? I'm a person too! DeFicacci didn't ask be a chamberpot!
Lumiere: None of us asked to be stuck in the forms of household items! But people are eating!
Chamberpot: So, DeFicacci only useful after dinner, eh? I get to live a solitary existence punctuated by people pooping on my...
Lumiere: I said people are eating!
[the chamberpot runs off crying]
Lumiere: Okay, let's just get through this dinner, so the Beast can bang this bitch... Belle? Where did Belle go?
[cut to Belle sitting on the chamberpot]
Chamberpot: Whoa, sound a horn! / Looks like someone's eaten corn!
Belle: [in agony] Does everything have to be a fucking song?