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Quotes for
Cogsworth (Character)
from Beauty and the Beast (1991)

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Beauty and the Beast (1991)
Beast: I want to do something for her... but what?
Cogsworth: Well, there's the usual things: flowers... chocolates... promises you don't intend to keep...

Cogsworth: As you can see, the pseudo-façade was stripped away to reveal the minimalist Rococo design. Note the unusual inverted vaulted ceilings.
[as he, Lumiere, and Belle walk past the knights in armor, they turn their heads to follow them]
Cogsworth: This is yet another example of the late neoclassic Baroque period. And, as I always say, "If it's not Baroque, don't fix it!"
[notices the knights with their heads turned]
Cogsworth: As you were!
[the knights turn their heads back forward]

Beast: [pounds on Belle's door yelling] I thought I told you to come down to dinner!
Belle: I'm not hungry!
Beast: [yelling to Belle] You'll come out, or I'll-I'll-I'll break down the door!
Lumiere: Master, I could be wrong, but that might not be the best way to win the girl's affections.
Cogsworth: Please. Attempt to be a gentlemen.
Beast: But, she's being so *difficult*!
Mrs. Potts: Gently... gently...
Beast: [calmly] Will you come down to dinner?
Belle: No!
Beast: [points at door] Hmm?
Cogsworth: Ah-ah-ah, suave, genteel.
Beast: [suavely] It would give me great pleasure...
[tries to hold in his anger]
Beast: if you would join me for dinner.
Cogsworth: [clears throat and mutters] We say please.
Beast: Please?
Belle: No, thank you!
Beast: [yells] You can't stay in there forever!
Belle: Yes, I can!
Beast: [yells] Fine! Then go ahead and *starve!* If she doesn't eat with me, then she doesn't eat at all!
[storms down through the hallway and slams the door behind him]
Mrs. Potts: Oh dear. That didn't go very well at all, did it?

Cogsworth: Enchanted? Ha-ha ha-ha! Who said anything about the castle being enchanted? Ha-ha-ha...
[to Lumiere]
Cogsworth: It was you, wasn't it?

Lumiere: [trying to prepare the Beast for his dinner with Belle] Voila! Oh, you look so... so...
Beast: [fur done up in curls and bows] Stupid.
Lumiere: Not quite the word I was looking for, but perhaps a - little more off the top.
Cogsworth: [Clears throat] Your lady awaits.

Cogsworth: Couldn't keep quiet, could we? Just had to invite him to stay, didn't we?
[imitates Lumiere]
Cogsworth: 'Serve him tea. Sit in the master's chair. Pet the pooch!'
Lumiere: I was trying to be hospitable.

Cogsworth: Well, Your Highness, I must say everything is going just swimmingly. I knew you had it in you, ha ha!
Beast: [sadly] I let her go.
Cogsworth: Huh, huh, huh! Yes, yes, splen - You what? How could you do that?
Beast: I had to.
Cogsworth: Yes, but, but, but but - *why?*
Beast: Because - I love her.

Cogsworth: [Maurice has opened his door to peek inside] Sir, close that at once! Do you mind?

Cogsworth: [shakes Lumiere's hand in truce] Well, Lumiere, old friend. Shall we let bygones be bygones?
Lumiere: Of course, mon ami. I told you she would break the spell!
Cogsworth: I beg your pardon, old friend, but I believe *I* told *you*.
Lumiere: No, you didn't. *I* told *you*!
Cogsworth: You most certainly did not, you pompous, paraffin-headed peabrain!
Lumiere: En garde, you... you overgrown pocket watch!

Cogsworth: [singing] Well, perhaps there's something there that wasn't there before.
Chip: What?
Mrs. Potts: [singing] There may be something there that wasn't there before.
Chip: *What's* there, Mama?
Mrs. Potts: Shh. I'll tell you when you're older.
[kisses Chip]

Cogsworth: [Beast has released Belle, meaning there's no-one to break the spell] Now, it's too late.

Beauty and the Beast (2017)
Lumiere: Look, a girl!
Cogsworth: I can see it's a girl, you fool!
Lumiere: What if she is the one?
Belle: [looks around the castle] Hello?

Kingdom Hearts II (2005) (VG)
Beast: Listen Belle...
Belle: Yes?
Sora: [Beast is trying to find the right words] Say it!
Lumiere: Go on!
Donald: C'mon!
Mrs. Potts: You can do it!
Cogsworth: We have confidence
Goofy: Don't be bashful now
Beast: [he turns back to Belle again] Belle, I'd like you to stay... With me... Please?
Belle: [she smiles at him] I will

Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas (1997) (V)
Belle: [singing] You belong side by side, you should never be apart, 'cause when you're both together, you're really twice as smart.
Cogsworth: [spoken] Twice as smart... she does have a point.
Lumiere: Yes. Well, two heads are better than one.

"Robot Chicken: Some Like It Hitman (#5.14)" (2011)
Lumiere: So you're dining with a beast / That doesn't mean you shouldn't feast!
Cogsworth: Let us handle reservations / Give your taste buds a sensation!
Chamberpot: Have your fill, eat more still / There's no need to slow your pace / After dinner, you'll be thinner / once you sit down on my face!
Lumiere: Who's for seconds?
Chamberpot: Eat a lot / then come meet your chamberpot...
Lumiere: We are trying to serve dinner!
Chamberpot: What, DeFicacci doesn't get to sing along? I'm a person too! DeFicacci didn't ask be a chamberpot!
Lumiere: None of us asked to be stuck in the forms of household items! But people are eating!
Chamberpot: So, DeFicacci only useful after dinner, eh? I get to live a solitary existence punctuated by people pooping on my...
Lumiere: I said people are eating!
[the chamberpot runs off crying]
Lumiere: Okay, let's just get through this dinner, so the Beast can bang this bitch... Belle? Where did Belle go?
[cut to Belle sitting on the chamberpot]
Chamberpot: Whoa, sound a horn! / Looks like someone's eaten corn!
Belle: [in agony] Does everything have to be a fucking song?