Quotes for
Ted Striker (Character)
from Airplane! (1980)

Airplane! (1980)

Ted Striker: My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.
Elaine Dickinson: When will you be back?
Ted Striker: I can't tell you that. It's classified.

Ted Striker: Because of my mistake, six men didn't return from that raid.
Elaine Dickinson: Seven. Lieutenant Zip died this morning.

Ted Striker: It's Lieutenant Hurwitz. Severe shell-shock. Thinks he's Ethel Merman.
Lieutenant Hurwitz: [singing] You'll be swell, you'll be great. Gonna have the whole world on a plate. Startin' here, startin' now. Honey, everything's comin' up roses...
Ted Striker: War is hell.

[Thinking to himself]
Ted Striker: I've got to concentrate...
[his thoughts echo]
Ted Striker: concentrate... concentrate... I've got to concentrate... concentrate... concentrate... Hello?... hello... hello... Echo... echo... echo... Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon... Manny Mota... Mota... Mota...

[as the plane prepares to take off]
Hanging Lady: Nervous?
Ted Striker: Yes.
Hanging Lady: First time?
Ted Striker: No, I've been nervous lots of times.

Rumack: Can you fly this plane, and land it?
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.

Elaine Dickinson: You got a letter from headquarters this morning.
Ted Striker: What is it?
Elaine Dickinson: It's a big building where generals meet, but that's not important.

Rumack: Well, I don't have anything to say, you've done the best you could. You really have, the best you could. You can't expect to win em all. But, I want to tell you something I've kept to myself through these years. I was in the war myself, medical corps. I was on late duty one night when they brought in a badly wounded pilot from one of the raids. He could barely talk. He looked at me and said, "The odds were against us up there, but we went in anyway, I'm glad the Captain made the right decision." The pilot's name was George Zip.
Ted Striker: George Zip said that?
Rumack: The last thing he said to me, "Doc," he said, "some time when the crew is up against it, and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to get out there and give it all they got and win just one for the Zipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Doc," he said, "but I won't smell too good, that's for sure."
Ted Striker: Excuse me doc, I got a plane to land.

Ted Striker: I flew single engine fighters in the Air Force, but this plane has four engines. It's an entirely different kind of flying, altogether.
Rumack, Randy: [together] It's an entirely different kind of flying.

Rex Kramer: [talking to Steve McCroskey] Our only hope is to build this man up. We gotta give him all the confidence we can.
[to Striker]
Rex Kramer: Striker, have you ever flown a multi-engine plane before?
Ted Striker: No, never.
Rex Kramer: [to McCroskey, with the microphone still on] Shit! This is a God damn waste of time! There's no way he can land this plane!

Ted Striker: Mayday! Mayday!
Steve McCroskey: What the heck is that?
Johnny: Why, that's the Russian New Year. We can have a parade and serve hot hors d'oeuvres...

Rex Kramer: [points out the window] There he is. Striker, you're coming in too fast!
Ted Striker: I know, I know!
Elaine Dickinson: [relaying] He knows, he knows.

[Elaine is relaying what Ted is saying to Kramer]
Ted Striker: It's a damn good thing he doesn't know how much I hate his guts.
Elaine Dickinson: It's a damn good thing you don't know how much he hates your guts.

[Flashback, about a bar he frequented during the war]
Ted Striker: It was a rough place - the seediest dive on the wharf. Populated with every reject and cutthroat from Bombay to Calcutta. It's worse than Detroit.

Rumack: I won't deceive you, Mr. Striker. We're running out of time.
Ted Striker: Surely there must be something you can do.
Rumack: I'm doing everything I can... and stop calling me Shirley!

Elaine: It takes so many things to make love last. But most of all, it takes respect, and I can't live with a man I don't respect.
Ted Striker: [turns towards the camera] What a pisser!

[with Randy's help, and as Dr. Rumack looks on, Ted is attempting to figure out how the controls of Flight 209 work]
Elaine Dickinson: Ted! What are you doing here? *You* can't fly this plane!
Ted Striker: That's what I'm trying to *tell* these people!

Rex Kramer: Don't be a fool, Striker, you know what a landing like this means, you more than anybody. I'm ordering you to stay up there.
Ted Striker: No dice, Chicago. I'm giving the orders and we're coming in. I guess the foot's on the other hand now, isn't it, Kramer?

Ted Striker: [plane loses an engine] The oil pressure. I forgot to check the oil pressure! When Kramer hears about this, the shit's going to hit the fan!
[in the office, shit hits a fan and splatters all over the room]

[looking at the controls of the airplane as he begins to try to fly it]
Ted Striker: Let's see... altitude: 21,000 feet. Speed: 520 knots. Level flight. Course: zero-niner-zero. Trim and mixture: wash, soak, rinse, spin.

Elaine Dickinson: [Cutting room-floor scene: Flight #209 has gone into yet another nose dive] ... Ted, the altitude! We're falling, Ted! We're falling! *The mountains, Ted! The mountains!*
Ted Striker: What *mountains?* We're over IOWA!
Elaine Dickinson: The... THE CORNFIELDS, TED! THE CORNFIELDS!

Airport Steward: Smoking or non-smoking?
Ted Striker: Smoking.
[She hands him a boarding pass that is belching out smoke]

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Airplane II: The Sequel (1982)

Striker: Which passenger is Joe Solucci?
Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: 16C. Why?
Striker: He's carrying a bomb.
Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: A bo - ?
Striker: No, not a bo-. A bomb. Now, discreetly as possible, I want you to move the passengers, into the lounge.
Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: We don't, have a lounge.
Striker: That's not important right now but, you got to do is get those people away from that bomb.
Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: Well, what should I say?
Striker: Anything, don't let Solucci think, that we're getting onto him.
Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: I'll do my best.

Jimmy: Can I ask you a question?
Striker: What is it?
Jimmy: It's an interrogative statement, used to test knowledge. But that's not important now, mister. Is my dog Scraps, is gonna make it through okay? I'm scared mister, somebody has to do something.
Striker: Scraps, is going to be fine son. You'll both, be just fine.
[Striker, puts Jimmy's face in the icing of the cake]
Simon: Striker, listen to me. I don't want you, to do this they forced me to cut corners...
Striker: Get outta my way!
Simon: Help me, Striker for Christ -
[Striker, slugs Simon in the face]

Striker: We're going to have to blow up the computer!
Elaine Dickinson: Blow ROC?
[a smiling face appears on the computer]

Striker: We're not in the past anymore, Elaine. This... is the FUTURE.

Striker: Where am I going to get a piece of metal?... Out here in space?... At this hour?

Striker: Ok Murdock, I think I got something that just might work.
Murdock: what?
Striker: A bobby pin.
Murdock: Bobby pin. What the hell's, a man doing with a bobby pin. Lights on
Murdock: [Turns lights on]
Murdock: All right Striker, if a bobby pin is what you got, you will have to do. Just shove it in there, you'll have to short that thing out.
Striker: [Shoves the bobby pin, into the broken lever compartment, and sparks]

Steve McCroskey: [after hearing Striker on the radio] A man - now that's more like it.
[to the radio]
Steve McCroskey: Come in Mayflower 1, give me your name and position.
Striker: My name's Striker and I'm sitting down and facing front. Why would you want to know that?

Striker: [in the cockpit] I guess it's in God's hands now.
Father O'Flanagan: [in cabin area] I'm Father O'Flanagan, and I am a man of God. Therefore you must trust me when I tell you that we're all likely going to die.

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Zero Hour! (1957)

Lt. Ted Stryker: [enters the cockpit] Oh doctor, the stewardess said...
[Stryker sees the pilot and co-pilot seats empty and the plane on automatic pilot]
Lt. Ted Stryker: BOTH pilots?
Dr. Baird: Can you fly this airplane and land it?
Lt. Ted Stryker: Not a chance!

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