Handsome Rob
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Quotes for
Handsome Rob (Character)
from The Italian Job (2003)

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The Italian Job (2003)
[Lyle isn't answering Charlie's calls]
Handsome Rob: He only answers to "The Napster" now, Charlie
Charlie Croker: Oh, no. I am not calling you The Napster.
Lyle: Why not? You call him Left Ear.
Left Ear: Well, I am.
Lyle: And him Handsome Rob.
Charlie Croker: Well, that's because he is Handsome Rob!
Lyle: Well you can call me The Napster.

Lyle: And then he's just the media darling... He's on the cover of all the magazines, I should of been on the cover of Wired Magazine. You know what he said? He said he named it "Napster" because it was his nickname because of the nappy hair under the hat. But he, it's because I was NAPPING when he STOLE it from me! He didn't even graduate!
Handsome Rob: I think it's time to move on, don't you? They shut him down, I wish they would do the same to you.

Lyle: [seeing the name "Becky" on the cable-girl's uniform; specifically on her left breast] Becky, huh? Nice name. I wonder what she calls the other one...
Handsome Rob: And it's such a mystery why you don't have a girlfriend, Lyle.

[Lyle wants to be called "The Napster"]
Handsome Rob: Come on, Charlie. They were at the same college at the same time.
Charlie Croker: Why are you encouraging this?

[timing the getaway to Union Station]
Handsome Rob: It's either bad traffic, peak traffic, slit-your-wrist traffic... you know, five people died from smoking in between traffic lights today.
Left Ear: You know, they do have the Metrorail, Rob, you could always use that.
Handsome Rob: Yeah, that'd be ideal for carrying a ton of gold now, wouldn't it, genius?
Charlie Croker: What's your guesstimate?
Handsome Rob: The last twenty times I done this journey, you've got an average of thirty two minutes and a top time of fifty, but if we had green lights all the way, we could do it in fourteen minutes.
Stella: [poking fun] What? Couldn't get through traffic?

Lyle: [about Stella getting into Steve's house and finding the location of the safe by impersonating a Netcom employee] You think Stella can pull it off?
Handsome Rob: I have my doubts... but there's no talking to Charlie
Lyle: [in an accent] What, you theenk he's meexing beesness with plezore?
Handsome Rob: He should know better. Only "I'm" allowed to do that.

Actor Reharsing in Car: Turn in your badge and your weapon. I don't want to see you anywhere near this investigation.
[Drinks from an imaginary cup and then pretends to crush the cup]
Actor Reharsing in Car: Crush. I don't wanna see you anywhere near this investigation!
[rehearses his lines quicker, while Handsome Rob waits at the lights impatiently]
Actor Reharsing in Car: Turn in your badge. And your weapon. I don't wanna see you anywhere this investigation.
[the lights turn green]
Handsome Rob: Oi, it's a *green*!
Actor Reharsing in Car: [rehearsing lines again] Turn in your badge and your weapon.
Handsome Rob: GREEN!
[Handsome Rob honks his horn repeatedly]
Actor Reharsing in Car: [driving off rehearsing his lines] Turn in your badge and your weapon, I don't wanna see you anywhere near this investigation!
[drives off and flips Handsome Rob off]
Handsome Rob: Unbelievable!

Lyle: I'm getting a NAD T770 digital decoder with 70-watt amps and Burr-Brown DACs.
Left Ear: [confused] Yeah...
Lyle: It's a big stereo. Speakers so loud, they blow women's clothes off!
Handsome Rob: Now you're talking!

Lyle: James Hymen? Come one, just once give me a cool name!
Left Ear: A hundred and forty pounds? Try one sixty five!
Handsome Rob: Try lifting some weights!
[as everyone is leaving Lyle still notices his bike is still laying on the ground]
Lyle: Hey, Charlie?
Charlie Croker: Handsome? Think you can help him with his bike?
Left Ear: Yeah, help Knievel set up for his next jump!

Handsome Rob: [after learning the value of the gold they've stolen] Twenty-seven million...
Left Ear: Say it again, man.
Handsome Rob: [louder] Twenty-seven million!
Left Ear: Again!
Handsome Rob: *Twenty-seven million!*

Left Ear: [reading from a guide book] "Learn the language of poetry, art, romance, sex..."
Handsome Rob: Unlike you, my friend, I don't need a guide book. Can we go?

John Bridger: I want to propose a toast. To us!
Charlie Croker, Lyle, Left Ear, Handsome Rob, Steve: Yeah!

Stella Bridger: Yeah, but so how do we get the gold from the vault to the getaway car.
Charlie Croker: How wide is the hallway... Napster?
Lyle: Six feet.
Handsome Rob: Okay, you've got your gold.

Lyle: Charlie, he's flying the coop.
Handsome Rob: When?

Charlie Croker: Napster, Gridlock every route except the one we chose. Force that truck to go exactly where we want it to go.
Handsome Rob: Where do we want it to go? We can't have a shoot up without guns. We'd lose.
Charlie Croker: We do it like the Italian job.