DS Andy Wainwright
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Quotes for
DS Andy Wainwright (Character)
from Hot Fuzz (2007)

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Hot Fuzz (2007)
DS Andy Wainwright: It's all right, Andy! It's just bolognaise!

DS Andy Wainwright: You do know there are more guns in the country than there are in the city.
DS Andy Cartwright: Everyone and their mums is packin' round here!
Nicholas Angel: Like who?
DS Andy Wainwright: Farmers.
Nicholas Angel: Who else?
DS Andy Cartwright: Farmers' mums.

Nicholas Angel: In the meantime, why don't you check out a few of Martin Blower's clients?
DS Andy Wainwright: Martin Blower represents damn near most of the village. Do you want us to go through the whole phone book?
DS Andy Cartwright: Yeah, we'll put a call in to Aaron A. Aaronson, shall we?
Nicholas Angel: Please, don't be childish. At least consider interviewing the widow. Martin Blower was clearly having an affair with Eve Draper.
DS Andy Wainwright: Ohh, and how did you establish that?
Danny Butterman: [pounds table] 'Cause we sat through three hours of so-called acting last night, and the kiss was the only convincing moment in it.
DS Andy Wainwright: All right, pipe down, biggun'.
DS Andy Cartwright: Here, what else you got, Crockett and Tubby?
Nicholas Angel: Skid marks.
DS Andy Wainwright: Now who's being childish?
Nicholas Angel: There were no skid marks at the scene! Doesn't it seem a little strange that Martin Blower would lose control of his car and not think to apply the brakes?

Nicholas Angel: What's the situation?
DS Andy Wainwright: Two blokes and a fuck-load of cutlery!

DS Andy Wainwright: What are you thinking? Foul play? Maybe...
[to Danny and Nicholas]
DS Andy Wainwright: We're just hoping to talk to the last people to see Mr Merchant alive. Namely a Sergeant Knickerless Ass-wipe and Cuntstable Fanny Batterbum.
Danny Butterman: [smiling] Hey, that's us!

[Doris knocks down a female shop assistant with a yellow "Slippery floor" sign]
DS Andy Wainwright: Nice one, Doris.
PC Doris Thatcher: Nothing like a bit of girl on girl!

[Andy takes a swig of beer, leaving a "moustache" of froth on his moustache]
Nicholas Angel: You've got a moustache.
DS Andy Wainwright: ...I know.

[at the scene of Leslie Tiller's death]
Sergeant Tony Fisher: Hang about, hang about... you're saying this wasn't an accident?
[Angel grimaces and drops money into the swear box]
Nicholas Angel: Leslie Tiller was FUCKING murdered!
DS Andy Cartwright: Just like Tim Messenger?
Nicholas Angel: Yes!
DS Andy Wainwright: George Merchant?
Nicholas Angel: Yes!
DS Andy Cartwright: And Eve Draper?
Nicholas Angel: Yes!
DS Andy Wainwright: Martin Blower?
Nicholas Angel: No, actually.
DS Andy Cartwright: Really?
Nicholas Angel: [shouts] 'COURSE HE FUCKING WAS!
[Danny drops a coin into the swear box]
Nicholas Angel: Thank you, Danny!

DS Andy Wainwright: Angel! Don't go being a twat, now.
Nicholas Angel: I wouldn't give you the satisfaction!

Nicholas Angel: [investigating Tim Messenger's murder] Did you find anything?
DS Andy Wainwright: Yeah, I looked at my watch, and I found out that it's way past time to stop working and that I should be at the pub!

Simon Skinner: I'm afraid my nickname of 'Sissy' is a revelation only to yourself. My teenage years studying ballet are well known.
DS Andy Wainwright: Yeah, Sissy Skinner. What a gaylord!
Simon Skinner: Thank you, Andrew.