Insp. Douglas Todd
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Quotes for
Insp. Douglas Todd (Character)
from Beverly Hills Cop (1984)

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Beverly Hills Cop II (1987)
Axel Foley: Inspector T, how you doin'?
Inspector Todd: Where the fuck you been, Foley? And what the fuck is this?
Axel Foley: It's a blue slip.
Inspector Todd: Wh-what in the hell do you need a thousand dollars for?
Axel Foley: A little flash money.
Inspector Todd: Flash money. Well, let's see here - $2,000 for a suit, $200 for a tie, a requisition order for a Ferrari. I'm don't wanna see any more of these blue slips. When am I gonna see some arrest slips?
Axel Foley: I know that you're getting' upset. And I know that you have reason to be upset. But let me tell you something, chief. I am close, I am so close now. I'm closer than I've been, and it-it's makin' me crazy. 'Cause I can smell it, it's in the air. And I smell it. It's
Axel Foley: I sm- Do you smell it? 'Cause I smell it.
Inspector Todd: All I smell is your bullshit. For six months, I been pourin' money down a bottomless hole. Where the bad guys at the end of this rainbow?
Axel Foley: Wait a second, look. I just thought, that if there was a problem-
Inspector Todd: Don't think, Axel! It makes my dick itch. The truth is, this department has fronted you a fortune. And my ass is on the line. I okayed all this shit!

Axel Foley: 24 hours a day I will be in the car. I will sleep, eat, drink, shit. I will- No, I ain't gonna shit.
Axel Foley: You thought I was gonna really shit. I wouldn't- Wh-what would I look like shitting in the car? I ain't gonna shit. Don't worry about a thing, though. I am on the job. Don't worry about a thing. I'm on the job!
Inspector Todd: THAT'S what I'm afraid of!

Det. Jeffrey Friedman: This is not my office!
Inspector Todd: You're damn right it isn't!

Inspector Todd: "Expert tutelage"? What the fuck have you been telling them?

Beverly Hills Cop III (1994)
Todd: Axel, you on a coffee break? Go get that son of a bitch.

Axel: Boss, I cancelled the SWAT team.
Todd: You what? I wouldn't raid a church bingo game without SWAT.

Beverly Hills Cop (1984)
Axel Foley: [outside the crime scene in front of Axel's apartment building after Mike is killed] Look, I heard a rumor that you're gonna use Rand on this case, and, between the two of us, the guy doesn't know the time of day.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Don't mess with me now, Axel.
Axel Foley: It's the first time he's left his desk in 12 years!
Inspector Douglas Todd: At least he's had 12 years. Anyway, it's a homicide case and it belongs to Rand. Now go to the hospital!
Axel Foley: Well, you don't mind if I ask around a little bit, do you?
Inspector Douglas Todd: Don't do a damn thing! It's Rand's case. Your ass is skating on thin ice as it is!
Axel Foley: Hey, look, we're talking about a friend of mine, here!
Inspector Douglas Todd: Yes, we are, aren't we! Now, let's take a close look at that. One, a hoodlum friend. Two, a professional hit. Three, in a cop's apartment. This whole thing stinks to high heaven!
Axel Foley: How do you know it was a professional hit?
Inspector Douglas Todd: I didn't just walk into this town from the cotton fields! Whoever killed your friend wasn't worried about your little narrow ass. If they were, you'd be lyin' beside him in that meat wagon. Just don't do a damn thing. Stay out of this!
Axel Foley: Well, look. I got some vacation time comin' to me. I wanna take my vacation now.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Stay away from this case, Axel.
Axel Foley: No, it's just that I feel I need a little vacation, that's all.
Inspector Douglas Todd: [after pausing to think for a moment] All right. Soon as you're finished at the hospital, you're on vacation.
Axel Foley: Thank you.
Inspector Douglas Todd: But if you decide to butt into this case, it'd be the longest vacation you ever heard of.

Inspector Douglas Todd: You mind telling me where the fuck you come off going undercover without authorization from me? What the fuck is this all about? You wanna play some fucking bullshit cowboy cop? Go do it in somebody else's precinct!
Axel Foley: Don't you wanna hear my side of the story?
Inspector Douglas Todd: What's your fucking side of the story?
Axel Foley: Let's hear your side of the story.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Hey Axel, I'm not takin' anymore of this shit from you. You know how much this little stunt of yours is gonna cost this city?
Axel Foley: I don't think cost is the issue here, sir. I think the issue should be my blatant disregard for proper procedure.
Inspector Douglas Todd: You damn right, wise ass! The mayor called the Chief, the Chief called the Deputy Chief, the Deputy Chief just chewed my ass out! You see I don't have any bit of it left, don't you? Where in the fuck did you get a truckload of cigarettes from anyway?
Axel Foley: From the Dearborn Hijacking.
Inspector Douglas Todd: From the Dearborn Hijacking? That fucking bust went down last week! That truck is supposed to be in the damn pound!
Jeffery: I tried to tell you.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Jeffery, this is none of your fucking business!
Jeffery: [Pointing to a random locker] This is not my locker!
Inspector Douglas Todd: Listen Axel, no more of these set ups, you understand? You're a good cop, and you got great potential, but you don't know every fucking thing. And I'm tired of taking the heat for your ass. One more time and you're out on the street. Do you understand me?
Axel Foley: Look, Boss, let me tell...
Inspector Douglas Todd: [emphatically] Do you understand me?
Axel Foley: Yeah, I understand. Boss. The Chief ain't chew it all out. You still got a little ass there.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Don't fuck with me Axel! Not now! Go on. Go home.