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Quotes for
Faith (Character)
from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" (1997)

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"Angel: Orpheus (#4.15)" (2003)
[Faith and Angelus are watching Angel's past]
Flapper: You saved her, mister. Oh!
Angelus: I'm in hell. This is hell, and I'm in it.
Flapper: Oh, gee, big fella, how can I thank you?
Angelus: We haven't fed on a human in decades. She's beggin' for it, you moron!
Angel: Get lost.
Flapper: Beg pardon?
Angel: Take a hike, Betty. Scram!
Flapper: Well, pound snow, ya mook!
Faith: We're reliving Angel's good deeds. You *are* in hell. Wicked.

Faith: Seriously man, did you miss the invention of the bath?

Faith: 'Cause I'm dying, dumbass.
Angelus: Not soon enough.
Faith: Way I figure, I got one last job. Baby-sit the psycho 'til they shove a soul up your...
Angelus: Not gonna happen.
Faith: Then I'm... whatever. Dust in the wind. Candle in the wind. There'll be a general wind theme.

Angelus: Oh, no. I remember this. I-I remember this place. I gotta get outta here.
Faith: Why? You freakin' out?
Angelus: It's coming, again.
Faith: What's coming?
Angelus: I can't do it again. I won't.
[Angel runs in front of a speeding car]
Faith: Angel, get out of the road!
Angelus: Arrrgh! No!
Faith: [laughing] Dude! You just rescued a puppy.

Faith: [to Connor] Break me off a switch, son. There's about to be a whoopin'.

[Faith and Willow are preparing to return to Sunnydale]
Faith: Wes.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Faith.
Faith: [to Angel] See? Brits know how to say goodbye.
[turns to Wesley]
Faith: Angel wanted to hug.
Angel: [off Wesley's look] No, I didn't.

Angelus: So, who's your big hero now?
Faith: Wasn't even his fault. God, does the guy gotta pay for everything?
Angelus: Choices, little girl. The ones you make with your heart of hearts.
[Angel begins to leave the Donut shop, but stops and locks the door]
Angelus: Uh-oh. What's gonna happen?
Faith: He won't.
[Angel walks back to the dead clerk]
Angelus: I'm deep in, Faith. Soul or no soul.
[Angel vamps-out]
Faith: Angel!
[Angel bites the clerk's neck and begins to drink]
Faith: Ugh.
[Faith's neck starts to bleed]
Faith: He was gonna save him.
Angelus: Or did he *choose* to be a little slow on the draw? Whoops! Dinner by armed robbery. Look at him, Faith. You're a murderer. You know just how good that blurry line tastes. You didn't think my hell was private, did ya?
[Angel screams]

Angelus: [From off-screen] It'll all be worth it. Is that what you try to tell yourself, Faithy? Is that the nasty little lie that kept those thighs nice and warm in your prison bunk?
Faith: [Looking around] You kiss your mama with that mouth?
Angelus: [Angelus appears behind her, laying on the ground] No, but I ate her with it.
[Angelus levitates to a standing position]
Angelus: And now for a poem. "Faith goes gently into that good night." You're fading fast, baby. I can feel it.
Faith: All the same, I hear this holler in the distance. Tells me you're about to get what's coming to you.

Angel: Faith, get up! Are you listening?
Faith: Angel, I'm dying.
Angel: Yeah. It's a lot easier than redemption, huh?
Angelus: [Grabs Angel by the neck] Always so concerned with the human condition.
[Throws Angel down the alley]
Angelus: It's no big mystery, man. They suffer, they die. That's what they're there for.

Angelus: Why do you get to be Marley's Ghost?
Faith: Because I'm dying dumb-ass.


Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Chaos Bleeds (2003) (VG)
[everybody arrives in front of a fortress]
Ethan Rayne: It's here. The First. I can taste its power in the air.
Cassandra Rayne: You... I sense something about you, some kinship. Who are you?
Ethan Rayne: Ethan Rayne, madam. Decidedly *not* at your services.
Willow Rosenberg: He's your great, great... something. A descendant.
Cassandra Rayne: I can sense the dark magic in you, the chaos in your soul. I was a soldier of light, and this is what my bloodline has come to? You repulse me.
Ethan Rayne: The feeling is entirely mutual. This isn't fair, you know. Technically I've won. The power I bargained for should be mine. But if you destroy the First...
Cassandra Rayne: Silence dog. I would silence you myself if I were able.
Spike: Here, let me get that for you.
[Spike punches out Ethan]
Cassandra Rayne: My thanks, kind sir.
[Cassandra then glares at the fortress]
Cassandra Rayne: I... I know this place. This is where I... this is where I died. But who are all of you?
Buffy: We're trying to finish what you started, Cassandra. Trying to destroy the First. I'm Buffy Summers. The Slayer.
Cassandra Rayne: A Slayer. This is good fortune. I am but a lost soul, and can no longer wield Hope's Dagger. But you are worthy Slayer. It shall be you.
Willow Rosenberg: That... that's great and all, so, thanks. But where does Buffy find Hope's Dagger?
Cassandra Rayne: Inside the fortress. It will still be there. Only one who is worthy may wield it.
Faith: You don't gotta be virgin or anything, right? Cuz that could be a problem.
Cassandra Rayne: No. Only one can go, and it should be a Champion of the Powers. There are no Champions present, but a Slayer will more than suffice. Buffy must go alone.
Faith: Sucks to be you.
Buffy: At times. Now, for instance.
[Ethan's unconscience body disappears in a flash of light]
Willow Rosenberg: Ethan! What happened to him? He just went poof.
Cassandra Rayne: Perhaps the First has plans for my traitorous descendant after all.
Buffy: Only one way to find out.

Xander Harris: Wait a minute. We're all here for a reason. Well, the rest of us are here because Ethan picked us. And Sid want to get away from the First. But what about Ethan? Maybe this is why he's here.
Ethan Rayne: Don't look at me. You're trying to keep me from getting the power I've worked all these years for, and you want me to help? You're all daft.
Buffy: No. I think Xander's right. She's *your* ancestor, Ethan. You've got to take the eyes.
[Ethan takes the eye and a portal appears in midair]
Faith: Now we're cooking with gas.
[the First appears]
The First: [to Buffy] You are a fool, Slayer. Did you truly think that you could do such a thing, in *this place*, without me knowing your every move?
Sid the Dummy: You know, for a being that likes a good wager, you seem awful eager to disrupt the contest before it's over.
The First: Little matchstick man. Do not try my patience. You are not even a part of this contest. The only reason I do not destroy you is that I am savoring the nurturing of hope in your heart, just as I will enjoy bearing witness to the destruction of that hope. Now, Slayer, it is time for the final contest to begin.
Buffy: [to everyone] Ready?
Xander Harris: Can I go home now?
Buffy: Let's go.

Faith: [picking up a shovel] Hey, I can plant a tree! Or, I could just kill something with it.

Faith: Ooh, spooky. Just kinda place I'd expect someone to hide hacked off pieces of a dead woman.
Kakistos: I've been waiting for this day.
Faith: I killed you once. Ain't afraid of you anymore.

Faith: I love property damage.

Faith: All right. Just gotta hope the rising water'll lift these barrels, pushing the elevator up with me in it. Man my brain hurts.

[after defeating Kakistos]
Faith: That's right. You *keep* coming back. I'll be waiting.

Sid the Dummy: Jeez! Took your sweet time. Demons are trying to whittle me down to a toothpick and you five are gallavanting around on your little scavenger hunt.
Buffy: I'm not sure being eaten by zombie penguins counts as gallavanting.
Faith: Actually, I'm having a blast. Beats prison hands down. Girl can't get this exercise in stir.
Spike: Right, look, can we just put the sodding flesh puzzle together and be done with it?
[They put the body parts together, the body assembles and Cassandra comes back to life]
Ethan Rayne: It's true. I can't believe it... my own ancestor, a warrior for the Powers.
Cassandra Rayne: Cold. Why am I so cold?

Faith: You did it, B. Thanks for the ringside seat.
Xander Harris: So what now? How do we get back?
Willow Rosenberg: It will happen on its own. I can... I can feel this place unraveling.
Buffy: What about you, Sid? What happens now?
Sid the Dummy: Now? Now I get to rest, at last. I've heard it said Heaven's different for everyone. For me it's gonna involve cards, babes and whiskey. Maybe I'll try to look up that doll Cassandra when I get there. Fella like me could show a girl like that a real good time.
[Sid leaves in a flash of light]
Buffy: I bet you could, Sid. I bet you could.

Faith: Comes down to this.
Kakistos: As I hoped it would. I want your blood for myself, Faith, thick and hot and full of spice.
Faith: You been eatin' too much Cajun.
Kakistos: Come, Faith. It is time.
Faith: Look into my eyes, Leatherface. You took the one person who'd offereded a hand to me - my Watcher - and you tore her throat out right in front of me. Now I get to take back a little piece of what you stole.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Dirty Girls (#7.18)" (2003)
Faith: You're protecting vampires? Are you the bad slayer now? Am I the good slayer now?

Faith: He's like Angel?
Spike: No.
Buffy: Sort of.
Spike: I'm nothing like Angel
Buffy: He fights on my side. Which is more than I can say for some of us.

[about the potential Slayers]
Faith: No more Starbucks for the wannabes, man. They've been spazzing for, like, hours.

Faith: Three squares, nice weight room, movie every third Sunday, could've been worse.
Spike: What movie?
Faith: Last one was Glitter. I guess it couldn't have been worse.

Faith: I've met you before, you know.
Spike: Yeah, you made a great impression on my chin.

[after Xander's speech about Buffy]
Faith: Damn. I never knew you were *that* cool.
Buffy: Well, you always were a little slow.

Faith: Whatcha wanna do to her, vamp? Huh? Somethin' like this?
[punches Spike]
Spike: Nice punch you got there. Lemme guess. Leather pants, nice right cross, doe eyes, holier-than-thou glower. You must be Faith.
Faith: Oh, goodie. I'm famous.
Spike: Told you were coming. Bit of a misunderstanding here. I'm...
Faith: Spike. Yeah, we've met before.
Spike: We have? I don't think we-
[Faith kicks him]
Spike: Bloody hell! What're you doing? I'm on your side.
Faith: Yeah? Maybe you haven't heard. I've reformed.
[punches Spike]
Spike: So have I.
[punches Faith]
Spike: I reformed way before you did.
[Faith punches him]
Spike: Stop...
[Faith punches him again]
Spike: hitting...
[punches Faith]
Spike: me! We're on the same side.
Faith: Please. You think I'm stupid?
Spike: Well, yeah.
Faith: You were attacking that girl.
[punches Spike]
Faith: [Buffy punches Faith]
Buffy: Sorry, Faith. I didn't realize that was you.
Faith: It's alright, B. Luckily you still punch like you used to.

Faith: We've met before, you know.
Spike: Yeah, you made a great impression on my chin.
Faith: Not in the graveyard. Before that. I was kinda wearing a different body. You seemed okay with it.
Spike: The body swap.
Faith: Buffy fill you in on that whole deal?
Spike: She told me what went down.
Faith: Look, I may have said a few things that...
Spike: "You could ride me until my knees buckled. Squeeze me 'til I pop like warm champagne" - that's not the kind of thing a man forgets.
Faith: You should have known it wasn't blondie behind the wheel. She'd never throw down like that.
Spike: Oh, you have been away.
Faith: What? Don't tell me little Miss Tightly Wound's been getting her naughty on?
Spike: Not of late.
Faith: Wow, everyone's just full of surprises.

Caleb: Well, you're the other one, aren't you. You're Cain to her Abel. No offense meant to Cain, of course.
Faith: Never was much for the good book.
Caleb: Oh, it has its moments. Paul had some good stuff, for instance. But overall I find it a tad complicated. I like to keep things simple: good folk, bad folk, clean folk, dirty folk...
[kills a Potential]
Molly: No!
Caleb: Yes.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Faith, Hope & Trick (#3.3)" (1998)
Faith: God, I could eat a horse. Isn't it crazy how slaying just always makes you hungry and horny?
[everybody looks at Buffy]
Buffy: Well... Sometimes I-I crave a nonfat yogurt afterwards.
Cordelia: I get it!
[everybody looks at Cordelia]
Cordelia: Not the horny thing, yuck! But the two slayer thing. There was one, and then Buffy died for like two minutes, so then Kendra was called, and then when she died, Faith was called.

Buffy: Maybe I should introduce you again. Faith, this is Giles.
Faith: I've seen him. If I'da known they came that young and cute, I would've requested a transfer.
Buffy: Raise your hand if eww.

Oz: [to Faith] I'm wondering about your position on werewolves.
Willow: [proudly] Oz is a werewolf.
Buffy: It's a long story.
Oz: I got bit.
Buffy: Apparently not that long.
Faith: Hey, as long as you don't go scratching at me or humpin' my leg, we're five by five.
Oz: Fair enough.

Faith: When I'm fighting, it's like the whole world goes away and I only know one thing: that I'm gonna win, and they're gonna lose. I like that feeling.
Buffy: Well sure, beats that "dead" feeling you get when they win and *you* lose.

Faith: What about you? What was your toughest kill?
Buffy: [thinking of Angel] Um, well, you know, they're all difficult, I guess. Uh, oh, oh, do you guys remember the Three? That's right, you never met the Three. Well, there was three...

Faith: This whole summer was a heat wave. The worst in years. So, it's about 118 degrees at night and I'm sleeping without a stitch on and all of a sudden I hear screaming from outside. I tear outside, stark nude, armed with my wooden stake and I see this church bus has broke down outside my apartment building and there are these three vamps feasting on half the Baptist clergy in my hometown of South Boston. So, I waste the vamps in less then a minute and the head preacher comes out of the bus and he thanks me for saving his life. He's literally hugging me like there's no tomorrow, when all of a sudden the cops pulled up and arrested us both.
Xander: Wow. They should film that story and show it on cable TV every Christmas.

Buffy: You got a problem?
Faith: I'm five by five, living it up. I'm just worried about your problem.
Buffy: What problem? I may not sleep in the nude or wrestle alligators...
Faith: Maybe it's time you started because something is bothering you. Something in your body needs uncorking. You've been moody and keeping to yourself since I met you. What is it? Is it the Angel thing?
Buffy: What do you know about Angel?
Faith: Just what your friends told me. He was your big love, big loss. A good vampire with a soul, but he turned evil after you two slept together and he then terrorized you and your friends for months as well as killed several people. You were forced to kill him to save the world and then you just ran away, refusing to talk about it. You need to deal with it and move on, but your not. That's just my idea.
Buffy: I got an idea. How about from now on, you do not talk about Angel, you do not say his name, and you do not ask me any more questions about my personal life, which by the way... is my life!
Faith: Whoa! Why are you getting so strung up, B?
Buffy: Why are your lips still moving, F?
Faith: Did I just hear a threat?

Faith: So, what brings you here to the poor side of town?
Buffy: Cloven guy, goes by the name of Kakistos.
Faith: What do you know about Kakistos?
Buffy: That he's here in town looking for you.We're not happy to see old friends, are we? Who is he? Why is he after you?
Faith: [suddenly nervous] I really don't want to talk about it.
Buffy: Why? What he do to you?
Faith: It's what I did to him.
Buffy: And what is that? That he was the master vampire down in Louisiana who kept alligators, whom you claimed to have killed, but he survived. Faith, you came here for a reason. I can help.
Faith: [starts to back her backpack] You can mind your own business. I'm the only one who can handle this.
Buffy: Yeah, you're a real badass when it comes to packing! Or is that what you said to me about my problem? "Gotta deal and move on?" You have the moving on part right here, but what about dealing? Is that something you're going to dump on me?
Faith: You don't know me and I don't know you! You have no idea what I've been through! I can take care of this on my own!
Buffy: Like he took care of your Watcher? He tracked you down to Boston and he killed her, didn't he?
Faith: There is not a word for what he did to her. He murdered her in the most gory and hideous way and forced me to watch it all.
Buffy: Faith, if you run he runs after you.
Faith: That's where the head start comes in handy.


"Angel: Salvage (#4.13)" (2003)
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: We need you.
Faith: Well, uh, hate to wet the paper for you Wes, but I'm kinda unavailable right now. Maybe you wanna check back in a few decades when my parole comes up.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: You need to know...
Faith: It's Armageddon again. I dig. Last thing you need's me in the mix. Besides, Angel comes shinin' through in the end like he always does.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Angel's gone, Faith. Angelus is back.
[long pause]
Faith: Step away from the glass.

Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Feel natural?
Faith: Eh, it's like ridin' a biker.

Cordelia Chase: Faith? What the hell is she doing here?
Faith: Nice to see you too, Cor.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: She's here to help.
Cordelia Chase: Oh, gee! That's great. Oh, wait a sec. Wasn't she convicted of murder and sent to a state correctional facility for, like, a gazillion years?
Faith: Murder two, twenty-five to life, for the record.

Connor: So, Vampire Slayers. I was told about them. How come you're always girls?
Faith: I don't know. Better at it, I guess.

Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: How do you expect to find Angelus without Connor?
Faith: The old-fashioned way. Kid's not the only tracker. Something'll turn up. Trail of bodies. A telltale clue.
[sees a big sign that says "Welcome Faith"]
Faith: Maybe a carpet fiber.

Faith: [after they jump out a window together] You okay?
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Five by five.

[Wesley and Faith are hunting Angelus through dark streets]
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Do you know where we're going?
Faith: Not especially.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: How do you expect to find Angelus without Connor?
Faith: The old-fashioned way. The kid's not the only tracker. Something'll turn up. A trail of bodies, a tell-tale clue...
[They turn a corner and look up at a huge, hand-written sign hung above a building that reads "WELCOME FAITH"]
Faith: [Faith finishes her list ironically:] Maybe a carpet fiber.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: This Year's Girl (#4.15)" (2000)
[Faith meets Buffy after months in a coma]
Faith: What'd you think, I'd wake up and we'd go for tea? You tried to gut me, Blondie.

[first lines]
Buffy: They smell good, don't they?
Faith: What?
Buffy: Clean sheets. Like summer.
Faith: I wouldn't know.
Buffy: Right. I forgot.
Faith: I noticed.
Buffy: I wish I could stay, but...
Faith: No, you have to go.
Buffy: It's just with...
Faith: Little sis coming. I know. So much to do before she gets here.

Faith: You are thinking, "You'll never get away with this!" Warm?
Joyce: Actually, I was thinking my daughter is going to kill you soon.

Faith: I mean, nobody cares, nobody remembers... especially not Buffy, fabulous superhero. Sooner or later, you're gonna have to face it. She was over us a long time ago, Joyce.

Faith: You think you matter, you think you're a part of something, and you get dumped. It's like the whole world is moving, but you're stuck. Like those animals in the tar pits. It's like you just keep sinking a little deeper everyday, and nobody even sees!

Faith: [Willow is creeping behind Faith brandishing a backpack] Try it, Red, and you lose an arm.


"Angel: Release (#4.14)" (2003)
Faith: We track him, we find him, we...
Angelus: Get your asses kicked? I don't know, wild guess.

Angelus: Oh. Don't tell me. The rousing stiff upper lip speech. Rah-rah. Good over evil. Do what must be done. Hang in there, Kitten, it's almost Friday. Is that what the scraggly little ponce armed you with to fight the big bad bogeyman?
Faith: Yeah. And this.
[throws a knife and stabs him]

Angelus: That hurt, baby. Kinda liked it. How 'bout you? There's my girl. Knew she was in there somewhere dying to come out and play again.
Faith: Shut up.
Angelus: I know how it feels. Forced to be someone you're not. Hurts to the bone. You try to bury the pain, but you can't get the hole deep enough, can you? No matter how much you dig, it's still there. Broken shards stabbing every time you breathe, cutting you up inside. You know, there's only one way to make the pain stop. Hurt someone else.

[Faith has destroyed part of a wall in Wesley's bathroom]
Faith: Sorry about your bathroom.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: It's not the bathroom I'm worried about. Although, I'm sure my security deposit is a complete loss.

Faith: You crossed it back there Wes.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Oh you have a problem with a little torture now? Seem to recall a time when you rather enjoyed it.
Faith: Well it's not me anymore. You know that.
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: I remember what you did to me, Faith. The broken glass, the shallow cuts so I would remain conscious.
Faith: You think I'd hurt you again?
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: This the part where you tell me you've turned over a new leaf? Found God? Inner peace? We both know that isn't true. You haven't changed. You can't. Because you're sick. You've always been sick. It goes right down to the roots rotting your soul. That's why your friends turned on you in Sunnydale, why the Watchers Council tried to kill you. No one trusts you Faith. You're a rabid dog who should have been put down years ago!
[Faith slams Wesley into a fence]
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: See, wasn't so hard was it? It's what you'll need to beat him.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Revelations (#3.7)" (1998)
Faith: You can't trust guys.
Buffy: You can trust some guys. Really, I've read about them.

Faith: I've had my share of losers, but, you - you boinked the undead.

Buffy: How are you?
Faith: Five by five.
Buffy: I'll interpret that as good.

[after Miss Post has put on the Glove of Myhnegon and absorbed it's power]
Faith: What's going on?
Gwendolyn Post: Faith... a word of advice: you're an idiot!

Buffy: Look, Gwendolyn Post, or whoever she was... she had us all fooled, even Giles.
Faith: Yeah, well you can't trust people. I should've learned that by now.
Buffy: I realize this is gonna sound funny coming from someone that just spent a lot of time kicking your face... but you can trust me.
Faith: Is that right?
Buffy: I know I kept secrets, but I didn't have a choice. I'm on your side.
Faith: I'M on my side, and that's enough.


"Angel: Judgment (#2.1)" (2000)
Angel: I had to sing Barry Manilow.
Faith: You're kidding.
Angel: In front of people.
Faith: And here I am talking about my petty little problems.
Angel: I just wanted to give you a little perspective.
Faith: "Copacabana"?
Angel: "Mandy." I don't wanna dwell on it.
Faith: The road to redemption is a rocky path.
Angel: That it is.

Angel: The food getting any better?
Faith: You know, it's not that different from what I grew up on. It's a little one-note, eating the same thing every day.
Angel: I wonder what that's like.

Faith: Bad day. One the girls in the yard tried to build a rep by throwing down with me. She had low self-esteem, and a homemade knife, so...
Angel: Oh. Is she... you know... alive?

Faith: Think we might make it?
Angel: We might.


"Angel: Sanctuary (#1.19)" (2000)
Faith: There's nothing I can do for you, B. I can't ever make it right.

Faith: Are you saying I got to apologize?
Angel: Think you can?
Faith: I don't know. How do you say, "Gee, really sorry that I tortured you nearly to death"?
Angel: Well, first off I think I'd leave off the "Gee"...

[Angel pops out of the shower]
Angel: Everything okay in there?
Faith: It was touch-and-go for those four minutes you left me alone but somehow I got through it.

Faith: I mean, am I your prisoner here?
Angel: No, you're not my prisoner.
Faith: So I'm free?
Angel: Don't know about that... but the door's open.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Doppelgangland (#3.16)" (1999)
Faith: [to Buffy] You're gonna love it, B. It's just like fun, only boring.

Faith: Thanks, Sugar Daddy.
Mayor Richard Wilkins: Now, Faith, I don't find that sort of thing amusing. I'm a family man. Now, let's kill your little friend.

[Faith strides into the library, followed by Wesley, panting and doubled over]
Faith: [sarcastically] Well, that was a blast.
Giles: How did it go?
Faith: Princess Margaret here had a little trouble keeping up.

Faith: Are you serious about this place?
Mayor Richard Wilkins: Of course I am. No slayer of mine's gonna live in a flea-bag hotel; that place has a very unsavory reputation. There are immoral liaisons going on there.
Faith: Yeah, plus all the screwing.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Enemies (#3.17)" (1999)
Faith: No one can stop the Ascension. Mayor's got it wired, B. He built this town for demons to feed on, and come graduation day, he's gettin' paid. And I'll be sittin' at his right hand - assuming he has hands after the transformation, I'm not too clear on that part. And all your little lame-ass friends are gonna be kibbles 'n' bits.

Buffy: I never knew you had so much rage in you.
Faith: What can I say? I'm the world's best actor.
Angel: Second best.

Buffy: Well.
Angel: Well.
Buffy: That was very... artistic.
Angel: Yeah.
Buffy: It wasn't what I expected. I mean, I-I've never actually seen... Well, from the title, I thought it was about food.
Angel: Well, there was food.
Buffy: Right. Th-the-the scene with the... food. So, feel like getting some hot chocolate, or some cold shower?
Angel: I'm sorry. I wanted to take you out somewhere fun. It's been a long time since I've been to the movies. They've changed.
Buffy: A little scary. And a little not, which is also scary. I'm sorry. I-I just don't like getting you worked up like that. We can't actually do any of those things. You'd lose your soul, and besides, I don't even own a kimono.
Angel: Buffy, you don't have to worry about me.
Buffy: I just don't like to rub your nose in it. Suddenly wondering where that expression comes from.
Angel: Look, I-I don't need to see movies to get worked up. Just being around you does that just fine. It doesn't mean that I'm gonna lose control, or that I'm gonna be frustrated around you. It feels nice just to feel.
Buffy: It doesn't drive you crazy when we're close?
Angel: Watch this.
[kisses her]
Angel: See? Safe as houses.
[they kiss again]
Faith: Check out the lust bunnies.
Buffy: Patrol?
[Faith nods]
Angel: The council has you back on active duty?
Faith: Finally. They want us down by Mercer.
Buffy: Okay.
[to Angel]
Buffy: Good night.
Angel: I'll see you soon.
Faith: Don't worry, big guy. Just keepin' her warm for ya.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Bad Girls (#3.14)" (1999)
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: Ah, this is perhaps Faith.
Faith: [eyes him] New Watcher?
Buffy, Rupert Giles: New Watcher.
Faith: Screw that.
[she turns and leaves]
Buffy: [to Giles] Now why didn't I just say that?
Rupert Giles: Eh, Buffy, would you...
Buffy: I'll see if I can get her back.
[to Wesley, snidely]
Buffy: Don't say anything incredibly interesting while I'm gone.
[she walks off]

Faith: [to Buffy] Hey girlfriend. Bad time?
Willow Rosenberg: She can't.
[to Buffy]
Willow Rosenberg: Can you? Can you?
Willow Rosenberg: Buffy! This is fifteen percent of your final grade, and that's... apparently meaningless.

Buffy: That's the job. What else can we do?
Faith: Whatever we want! We're slayers, girlfriend. The Chosen Two. Why should we let him take all the fun out of it?
Buffy: That'd be tragic, taking all the fun out of slaying and stabbing and beheading.
Faith: Oh, like you don't dig it.
Buffy: I don't.
Faith: Liar. I've seen you. Tell me staking a vamp doesn't get you a little bit juiced. Say it.
[Faith stops, faces Buffy, folds her arms, and waits. Buffy smiles, hesitates, looks away... ]
Faith: Aah! Can't fool me. The look in your eyes right after a kill. Just get hungry for more.
Buffy: You are way off base.
Faith: Tell me that if you don't get in a good slaying, after a while you start itching for some vamp to show up so you can give him a good...
[makes a stabbing sound and grunts]
Buffy: Again with the grunting. I'm not comfortable with that.
Faith: Hey slaying is what we're built for. If you're not enjoying it, you're doing something wrong.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Who Are You? (#4.16)" (2000)
Faith: [trying to convince Giles she's really Buffy in Faith's body] Giles, you turned into a demon, and I knew it was you. I mean, can't you just look in my eyes and be all intuitive?
Giles: How did I turn into a demon?
Faith: [as Buffy] Oh, 'cause, uh, Ethan Rayne. And-and you have a girlfriend named Olivia... and you haven't had a job since we blew up the school... which is valid lifestyle-wise. I mean, it's not like you're a slacker type, but - Oh, oh! When I had psychic power I heard my mom think that you were like a stevedore during sex. W- Do you want me to continue?
Giles: Actually, I beg you to stop.
Faith: What's a stevedore?

Faith: OK, Giles, you have to listen to me very carefully. I'm not Faith.
Giles: Really?
Faith: Really.
Giles: 'Cause the resemblance is striking.
Faith: I know. Giles, you just have to... stop inching. You were inching.
Giles: Look, I-I know what you're going to say, and-and uh...
Faith: I'm Buffy.
Giles: All right, I didn't know what you were going to say, but that doesn't make you any less crazy.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Graduation Day: Part 1 (#3.21)" (1999)
Mayor Richard Wilkins: Just go home, take it easy! It's a big day tomorrow.
Faith: You gotta give me something to do. There's no way I'm sleeping! Don't you need anyone dead? Or maimed? I can settle for maimed.
Mayor Richard Wilkins: [laughs] You little firecracker!

[Faith menaces Professor Worth with a knife]
Lester Worth: I'll scream!
Faith: Who wouldn't?


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Consequences (#3.15)" (1999)
[after meeting Cordelia]
Wesley Wyndam-Pryce: My. She's cheeky, isn't she?
Faith: Uh, first word: jail; second word: bait.

Mr. Trick: [launching his attack on the slayers] Fangs, don't fail me now!
Faith: Fangs don't fail me now? What is this, a minstrel show?
[Trick lunges, and she dusts him]
Faith: Stake, do your stuff!


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: End of Days (#7.21)" (2003)
Faith: I'm looking at you, everything you have, and, I don't know, jealous. Then there I am. Everybody's looking to me, trusting me to lead them, and I've never felt so alone in my entire life.
Buffy: Yeah.
Faith: And that's you every day, isn't it?
Buffy: I love my friends. I'm very grateful for them. But that's the price. Being a slayer.
Faith: There's only supposed to be one. Maybe that's why you and I can never get along. We're not supposed to exist together.
Buffy: Also, you went evil and were killing people.
Faith: Good point. Also a factor.
Buffy: But you're right. I mean, I... I guess everyone's alone. But being a slayer? There's a burden we can't share.
Faith: And no one else can feel it. Thank God we're hot chicks with superpowers.

Faith: [holding the scythe] It's old, strong, and it feels like... like it's mine.
[drops the scythe in front of Buffy]
Faith: I guess that means it's yours.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Chosen (#7.22)" (2003)
Faith: It's pretty radical, B.
Giles: It's a lot more than that. Buffy, what you said, it-it-it flies in the face of everything we've ever - every generation has ever done in the fight against evil. I think it's bloody brilliant.
Buffy: You mean that?
Giles: If you want my opinion.

Faith: That's assuming they get past us.
Principal Robin Wood: Which, no offense, I am.
Faith: Come on, you gotta have a little faith.
Principal Robin Wood: [under his breath] I think I've had my share, thanks.
Faith: Well, I trundled right into that one, didn't I? Look, I'm sorry if it seemed like I was blowing you off the other day. I was just trying to, you know, blow you off.
Principal Robin Wood: Yeah, you know what, I figured that one out all by myself.


"Angel: Five by Five (#1.18)" (2000)
Faith: Who is 'we', and why do they know about me when I don't know jack about you?
Lilah Morgan: Green is my favorite color. I look good in diamonds. And I love riding in limousines.

Faith: I'm evil! I'm bad! I'm evil! Do you hear me? I'm bad! Angel, I'm bad!
[She begins to sob, grabbing a hold of Angel's shirt and shaking him]
Faith: I'm ba-ad. Do you hear me? I'm bad! I'm bad! I'm bad. Please. Angel, please, just do it.
[Wesley comes running out of the house]
Faith: Angel please, just do it. Just do it. Just kill me. Just kill me.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Choices (#3.19)" (1999)
Willow: Faith, wait. I wanna talk to you.
Faith: Oh yeah? Give me the speech again, please. "Faith, we're still your friends. We can help you. It's not too late."
Willow: It's way too late. You know, it didn't have to be this way. But you made your choice. I know you had a tough life. I know that some people think you had a lot of bad breaks. Well, boo hoo. Poor you. You know, you had a lot more in your life than-than some people. I mean, you had friends like Buffy. Now you have no one. Y-You were a Slayer and-and now you're nothing. You're just a big selfish, worthless waste.
Faith: [punches Willow] You hurt me, I hurt you. I'm just a little more efficient.
Willow: Aw, and here I just thought you didn't have a come-back.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Empty Places (#7.19)" (2003)
Faith: This town, walking anywhere after dark is like an extreme sport.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Touched (#7.20)" (2003)
Principal Robin Wood: That's exactly what The First does. Finds your Achilles Heel.
Faith: No, it just talked to me. What, it does a heel thing, too?
Principal Robin Wood: Um, it's a - it's a phrase. Your weak spot.
Faith: Oh. The school thing. I was kinda absent that decade.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Zeppo (#3.13)" (1999)
Faith: Yeah, that was real manly how you shrieked and all.
Xander: I think you'll find that was more of a bellow.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Graduation Day: Part 2 (#3.22)" (1999)
Buffy: There's something I'm supposed to be doing.
Faith: Oh yeah. Miles to go. Little Miss Muffet counting down from 7-3-0.


"Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Beauty and the Beasts (#3.4)" (1998)
Faith: All men are beasts, Buffy.
Buffy: Okay, I was hoping to not get that cynical till I was at least forty.
Faith: It's not cynical, I mean, it's realistic. Every guy - from Manimal right down to Mr. I-Loved-The-English-Patient has beast in him. And I don't care how sensitive they act - they're all still just in it for the chase.