Kelly Garrett
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Quotes for
Kelly Garrett (Character)
from "Charlie's Angels" (1976)

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"Charlie's Angels: The Mexican Connection (#1.2)" (1976)
Sabrina Duncan: Well, I knew you were fast, kiddo, but moving in as hostess for the big man on the first day has got to be a record.
Kelly Garrett: Must be my bikini. This style's called 'Bottoms up'.

Sabrina Duncan: Ok, I'll go with Jill, I know what we're looking for. Now you, eh, keep Bartone off our backs, ok?
Kelly Garrett: It's not your backs he's after...

Kelly Garrett: But Charlie, how did you manage to ski into a tree?
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] It was a matter of chivalry, Angel. Any woman who expends the effort to wiggle into a pair of pants that tight, deserves the full attention of every red blooded male on the slopes.
Jill Munroe: Oh, let us know if anybody writes anything juicy on your cast, Charlie.

Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] How's your breaststroke, Jill?
Jill Munroe: Oh, I thought you'd never ask, Charlie.
Kelly Garrett: Just swim in that water, Jill, don't drink it.

Jill Munroe: Hey, do you know if Sabrina managed to sign on to 'move her tail' for Bartone's airline?
Kelly Garrett: She did, but the way he looked her over I think he's after more than coffee, tea or milk.

Jill Munroe: Right on schedule, stewardess Duncan.
Sabrina Duncan: Only way to fly.
[takes a sip from her wine]
Kelly Garrett: Tacky, Sabrina, very tacky.
Sabrina Duncan: Thank you.

Frank Bartone: Sorry, but I have to go the wine cellar.
Kelly Garrett: I was hoping you'd consider attending to something more pressing, like you and I on the dance floor?
Frank Bartone: It is very difficult to refuse an invitation like that, but I must for the moment.

Peasant: I don't understand, I say 'Sweet Sue', I get wine, you pay me for wine?
Kelly Garrett: That's how Henry Kissinger does it.

John Bosley: Have formal charges been filed against Frank Bartone?
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] In spades, Bosley. The word is, Bartone couldn't even win a leniency appeal from a lady judge and an all woman jury.
Kelly Garrett: Don't count on it.

"Charlie's Angels: Night of the Strangler (#1.3)" (1976)
John Bosley: All of our prime candidates have alibis for the time of the murder.
Kelly Garrett: So our assignment is to shoot at the alibis until we find one that leaks?

Alec Witt: I only work here.
Kelly Garrett: Photographer?
Alec Witt: No, actually, I only carry these around to accent my wardrobe.
[indicating his cameras]

Kevin St. Clair: I foresee a long and happy relationship for just the two of us.
Kelly Garrett: Because I look like Dana Cameron?
Kevin St. Clair: I have affairs with all my models, didn't anyone tell you that?
Kelly Garrett: I guess they didn't.
Kevin St. Clair: So it really doesn't matter who you look like.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, I like subtle men, Mr. St. Clair.

Kelly Garrett: This jacket is like a tarantula, it keeps grabbing me!

Kelly Garrett: Do you think you can coral Woodman?
Jill Munroe: Ooh, faster than Roy Rogers!
Kelly Garrett: Roy Rogers?
Jill Munroe: Yeah, in my tomboy years, I was a real Roy Rogers freak. Ah, do you know when Trigger died, they stuffed him!
Jill Munroe: Is nothing sacred anymore?

Sabrina Duncan: Well, it wasn't Woodman, that's for sure. Jill was with him and I was following them.
Kelly Garrett: Where'd you leave him?
Jill Munroe: My house. I said I had a headache, he didn't push it.
Kelly Garrett: Gosh, you're over the hill at 24?
Jill Munroe: [laughs] Very funny.
[turns to Sabrina before she can speak]
Jill Munroe: You shut up!

Sabrina Duncan: You know, if you had been a couple of seconds later I would've been defiled by that creep.
Kelly Garrett: Now, that's the first time I've ever heard you complain about that.
Sabrina Duncan: Hey, he wasn't exactly Robert Redford, you know. If he had been Robert Redford, I might have said 'defile away'.

Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Now I'm going to have to hurry along, Angels. Work, work work.
Sabrina Duncan: Another case, Charlie? Gee, I thought you just finished one.
Charles Townsend: I did, and the last one really took a lot out of me.
Charles Townsend: [cut to Charlie sitting in a hot tub while a woman in a pink bikini climbs out of a pool and into the tub] But something else just came up, and you know how I put my heart into my work. Bye, Angels!
Sabrina Duncan, Jill Munroe, Kelly Garrett: Goodbye Charlie!

"Charlie's Angels: Angel in Hiding (#5.1)" (1980)
Kelly Garrett: [to Kris] You ready to do some cheesecake?
[Bosley knods aprovingly]

Dale Woodman: What makes you think that you will succeed here?
Kelly Garrett: What makes you think we can't?
Dale Woodman: Somehow I knew she was going to say that.

Kris Munroe: [watching a belly dancer] How does she do that?
Kelly Garrett: I think you need special joints.

Dale Woodman: You're ten minutes late.
Kelly Garrett: You're very punctual.
Dale Woodman: You will be too, if you come to work for me.

Kelly Garrett: I think you're staring at me.
Steve: You know I'm staring at you.
Kris Munroe: I think I'll mix.
[moves off]

Kelly Garrett: What do you do?
Steve: What do you like?
Kelly Garrett: Oh, I'd like to know what you do.

Julie Rogers: That's a tough operation down there.
Bosley: Yeah, I know.
Julie Rogers: I don't think you do. I was raised in a neigborhood like that. And what you see from the outside looking in, it's worse from the inside looking out.
Kelly Garrett: I get the feeling she knows what she's talking about, Bos.
Julie Rogers: Believe it, I do.

Charles Townsend: [over intercom] I talked to the police commissioner this morning. He was as pleased with Julie's work as I was with yours. So we came up with this terrific idea.
Kris Munroe: Which is?
Charles Townsend: [over intercom] Well, the commissioner is willing to make an exception in Julie's case and issue her an investigator's license, on a trial basis.
Kris Munroe: You mean...
Kelly Garrett: She'd be working here, with us?
Bosley: That's the general idea.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in Vegas (#3.1)" (1978)
Dancer: Guess what?
Kelly Garrett: What?
Dancer: You win this week's piece of free advice.
Kelly Garrett: Lucky me...

Kelly Garrett: I guess It's alright to sit here, since I'm alone.
[Haines shakes his head and finger negatively]
Kelly Garrett: No?
Mark Haines: House rules.
Kelly Garrett: How do you know?
Mark Haines: I make the rules, I run the house.

Mark Haines: Two winners in a row, must be my day.
Kelly Garrett: Two winners?
Kelly Garrett: Well, first I beat him, now I run into you again.

Mark Haines: You into stock cars?
Kelly Garrett: I'm into questions.

Kelly Garrett: Maybe those shots weren't meant for you, Frank.
Frank Howell: No, they were meant for the sand!

Kelly Garrett: Mr. Slocum, as you can see, this is a revolver I'm pointing at you.

John Bosley: Meet Dan Tana.
Dan Tana: Hi!
Kelly Garrett: You're Dan Tana?
Kris Munroe: You're Dan Tana?
Kelly Garrett: I just said that.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in Paradise (#2.1)" (1977)
Kris Munroe: [Kris, opens door with excitement on her first day] Hi! well, I'm here.
[Kelly and Sabrina looking puzzled]
Kris Munroe: It's me.
Kelly Garrett: Who?
Kris Munroe: Kris... Kris Munroe.
Sabrina Duncan: As in, Kris Munroe, Jill Munroe's younger sister, pigtails and braces?
Kris Munroe: [Points to Sabina, with excitement] You got it!

Kris Munroe: Ah excuse me, isn't that dance illegal?
Kelly Garrett: Joke all you want. The hula's really great exercise.
Kris Munroe: Uh huh. I'm just talkin' about what else it is.

Kris Munroe: Hey, is that it, is that the speaker that Charlie talks to you on?
Kelly Garrett: There is no Charlie, Bos' made him up.

Kris Munroe: I can't believe it, Charlie's been kidnapped and I haven't even seen him yet.
Kelly Garrett: So what else is new?

Kelly Garrett: She almost had us in her pocket.
Sabrina Duncan: Almost only counts in horse years, huh?

Kelly Garrett: Four questions, we split. Ok, sister?
Kona: Ok.
Kelly Garrett: That's one. Two: have you heard from Leilani Sako?
Kona: Yeah. That's two.

Kris Munroe: Hey, you know what, we could get killed trying this.
Sabrina Duncan: Well, if we do, I have only one wish:
Kelly Garrett: Yeah, that before we die...
Kris Munroe: We all get to see Charlie.

"Charlie's Angels: Target: Angels (#1.5)" (1976)
Jill Munroe: Hey, I'm gonna take the girls for some pizza, kind of a 'almost victory' party. Y'all come along?
Kelly Garrett: I'm sorry, but we've got, eh, other plans
[gives Alan a meaningful look]
Jill Munroe: Oh, well, that's a healthy activity too. See ya!

Dr. Alan Samuelson: [sighs] Is there anything you're not terrific at?
Kelly Garrett: [laughs] Navigating submarines. I never could get the knack.

Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Good morning, Angels, I'll get right to business. One of our informants called early this morning. He heard through the grapevine that there may be an attempt made on Kelly's life.
Kelly Garrett: I'm afraid your grapevine doesn't grow fast enough, Charlie, the attempt was made last night.

Sabrina Duncan: Ok, in the meantime, do you have a place to keep a low profile?
Kelly Garrett: A motel in Burbank.
Jill Munroe: Well that's as low as a profile can get!

Jill Munroe: [Kelly has just had a disturbing phone call] Our limping friend?
Kelly Garrett: Hm-hm. He wanted to express his appreciation for our staying in one place. And to let us know there's a lot more explosives left.
Jill Munroe: Oh, that's terrific. My life's ambition has always been to be a sitting duck.

Kelly Garrett: Do you ever get serious?
Jill Munroe: When I'm being shot at? Never.

"Charlie's Angels: One Love... Two Angels: Part I (#4.24)" (1980)
William Cord: I'm not selling encyclopedia's, I swear.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, you never are It's, eh, 'Education', or 'Research Material', but if I let you in and you open up that case, out pop those beautiful leather bindings and in 15 minutes you'll have sold me a whole new set of encyclopedia's
William Cord: Do you already have a set of encyclopedia's?
Kelly Garrett: [small voice] Two sets.

Kelly Garrett: You three and Charlie, you're the only real family I have.
John Bosley: Unless Oliver Barrows is your father...

William Cord: Are you alright?
Kelly Garrett: You mean aside from being terrified?
William Cord: Aside from being terrified.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, I'm fine!

Glenn Staley: Well, you were right, she's everything you've said.
Kelly Garrett: Well, I don't know what he told you, but...
Glenn Staley: Well, he told me you were very lovely and very intelligent, but strangely enough not in that order.

Oliver Barrow: So you're miss Garrett, if that's your real name...
Kelly Garrett: Oh, I don't know my real name. Garrett is the family name of one of the sisters at the orphanage where I was raised.
Oliver Barrow: I see. And you believe your true name might be the same as mine, Barrows.
Kelly Garrett: I don't know what to believe, Mr. Barrows, but I've done quite well with Garrett.

Charles Townsend: [on the phone] Hello?
Kelly Garrett: Charlie, this is Kelly.
Charles Townsend: [on the phone] Kelly, you sound strange. Something wrong?
Kelly Garrett: Oliver Barrows is dead.
Charles Townsend: [on the phone] I'm sorry, I truly am. If there's anything I can do?
Kelly Garrett: I want to hire you. I need to know who I am.

"Charlie's Angels: Love Boat Angels (#4.1)" (1979)
Blond Girl: Is this the Townsend Agency?
Kelly Garrett: Yes, it is.
Blond Girl: Oh, goody. I had such a hard time finding it, I got lost three times.

Blond Girl: Would you mind if I had a pop?
Kelly Garrett: Eh...
Kris Munroe: What?
Blond Girl: A pop.
[small giggle]
Blond Girl: You know, a soda pop.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, n-no.
Blond Girl: Oh, well sorry I asked.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, no, I mean, I don't mind if you have a soda pop.
Blond Girl: Oh!
[another giggle]
Blond Girl: you're a peach.

Kelly Garrett: Back so soon?
Kris Munroe: Yes, it got a little heavy.
Tiffany Welles: You mean he got rough?
Kris Munroe: No, he got very gentle. I got a little rough.

Edward Rourke: If there's a gun in that purse, you'd best leave it right where it is.
Kelly Garrett: Why would I have a gun?
Mr. DeMargerin: Perhaps you were... just reaching for a lipstick?
Kelly Garrett: Well, you know... unexpected company, a girl likes to look her best.
Mr. DeMargerin: [takes her gun out of her purse] Hm. You wouldn't look very pretty wearing this.
Kelly Garrett: Like mother always said: 'pretty is as pretty does'.

Mr. DeMargerin: I suppose you're not detectives, either?
Kelly Garrett: I'm not denying that.
Mr. DeMargerin: And you're all on a vacation?
Kelly Garrett: Detectives do take vacations, like everybody else.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on the Street (#4.7)" (1979)
Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] Angels, since you'll be shooting in the blind on this one, and Judy may not confide in you either, I suggest you establish some kind of cover going in.
Kelly Garrett: I agree, Charlie. Perhaps we could enroll as music students in your school.
Mr. Harkins: Oh? You're musicians?
Kelly Garrett: Well, I can dance, and ah, Kris is a singer.
Tiffany Welles: I play the violin, when it's not in the repair shop.
Kelly Garrett: Well, we'll think of something.
Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] Keep good thoughts, Mr. Harkins.

Kelly Garrett: Okay, so what do we have? A woman beater we can't procecute, a victim we can't talk to, a hooker named Rose who doesn't like her, but thinks Tiff and I will do great on the street.
Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] That may be the best way to proceed, Kelly.
Tiffany Welles: You're not suggesting we 'go into business', as they say?
Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] It's exactly what I'm suggesting.
Tiffany Welles: He's not serious.
Kris Munroe: No, Charlie's right.

Tiffany Welles: All right, so the question is: where did Judy get a fist full of fast cash?
Kelly Garrett: On the street. There are any number of ways: gambling, floating crap games, dope, numbers.

Big Larry: I'm Larry.
Kelly Garrett: Hmm, I'm Kelly
Tiffany Welles: Tiffany.
Big Larry: Love what I see, love what I hear. Step into my garden of delights, my dear.
Kelly Garrett: I bet you say that to all the girls."
Big Larry: I say that to everybody!"
Tiffany Welles: How democratic."

Freddie: Get in the car, we're going to a party.
Kelly Garrett: If we're going to a party, how come no-one's smiling?
Freddie: [without changing his sour expression] I am smiling. Get in the car.

"Charlie's Angels: Fallen Angel (#4.5)" (1979)
Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] Mr. Roth is a man with James-Bondian tastes, means and charm, also known to be an extraordinary jewel thief, he actually socializes with the very people he steals from. He always works in the daytime, with lots of people around, and he has never been caught. In fact, no-one in the jet set would even dream of accusing him.
John Bosley: Some people vulgarly refer to him as the Ice Cat.
Kelly Garrett: Diamonds.
John Bosley: Ah, most definitely, although in the past couple of years, he has branched out into emeralds and rubies as well.

Tiffany Welles: Okay, we know who the suspect is.
Kris Munroe: And we know what he's after.
Kelly Garrett: So what's the catch?
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Roth is the catch, Angels, he's extremely self-contained, practically impregnable. And I have heard that he's impervious to feminine wiles.
Kris Munroe: Hm, that sounds like a challenge.
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Well, it's certainly not a piece of cake.

Damien Roth: I'm very flattered, but I don't give interviews.
Kelly Garrett: Well, my blanket is right over there, and I have a tape recorder and a slew of questions.
Damien Roth: I'm sorry, but the answer's no.
Kelly Garrett: But your life is fascinating, I mean, you're a world traveler, a hobbyist, a sportsman...
Damien Roth: And sometimes an artist, but also, you see, I'm a recluse.

Jill Munroe: Stop following me around. It's not doing any of us any good.
Kelly Garrett: What do you want us to do, just turn our backs and walk away?
Jill Munroe: What are you talking about? I just wanna lead my life my own way.
Kelly Garrett: Jill, don't you think that this has gone far enough? What's going on? You've gotta tell me the truth.
Jill Munroe: There's this guy, Damien Roth. I think you've heard of him. I love him.
Kelly Garrett: We used to be so close.
Jill Munroe: We used to respect each other's privacy too.
Kelly Garrett: Jill, what's happening to you?
Jill Munroe: I'll tell you what's happening to me. I'm feeling pressured by people I thought were my friends. I don't like it.
Kelly Garrett: Do you really know Damien Roth?
Jill Munroe: Oh, give me a break! How do you ever know if you really know someone? I thought I knew you and Kris.
Kelly Garrett: Okay. Let's say you don't give a damn about what happens to you.
Jill Munroe: Great, let's say that.
Kelly Garrett: Well, what about Kris? Do you know what this is doing to her?
Jill Munroe: I'm not responsible for Kris anymore. Why don't you just get the hell out of my life.
Kelly Garrett: I'd be happy to. Whoever you are.
[Storms out of locker room]

"Charlie's Angels: Mr. Galaxy (#5.15)" (1981)
John Bosley: [briefing the Angels] Mr. Wilde has held the Mr. Galaxy title since he won it six years ago.
Artie Weaver: And he'd be a sinch to win it this again year if Ron was not in the competition.
Kelly Garrett: You think he may be trying trying to eliminate the competition?
Julie Rogers: Yeah, permanently.
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Now, Angels, no conclusion leaping.

Kelly Garrett: It must have taken a lot of guts to walk out on a man like Barr.
[Ron acknowledges silently]
Julie Rogers: And maybe now Mr. Barr is trying to spill them.

Kelly Garrett: It couldn't have escaped your notice that Ron Gates has been involved in some very mysterious accidents recently.
Danny Barr: And you're gonna try to pin them on me, is that right?
Kelly Garrett: I'm trying to discover the truth, Mr. Barr.
Danny Barr: Oh, the truth, Miss Garrett. The truth is, if I wanted that bum dead, he'd be dead. You get that? End of interview.

Kelly Garrett: Oh, you're planning to become an iron pumper, Bosley?
John Bosley: You never can tell. I just might challenge Mr. Galaxy.

"Charlie's Angels: The Sandcastle Murders (#2.18)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: You're a good guy, Charlie. Like to tell you that to your face some day.

Kelly Garrett: How do you hide a gun in a bikini?
John Bosley: Very carefully.

Kris Munroe: [upset and incoherent] Oh man, she was so scared. And it was like she knew something. Maybe about the murders. And I don't know, she was so lost and... and I was the only person that she could talk to, only, only I couldn't get through to her.
Kelly Garrett: Slow down, Kris.
Kelly Garrett: [on speakerphone, slightly annoyed] Translation, someone, please.

Lt. Francona: Then you had to be the last one to see her alive.
Kelly Garrett: Betsie's killer was the last person to see her alive.
Lt. Francona: If I want the cutes, honey, I'll turn on TV, ok?

"Charlie's Angels: Angel in Love (#2.6)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: We didn't realize this was lover's lane.
Lon Molton: You have a way of showing up where you don't belong.
Kelly Garrett: Well, that's why I'm with Kris. She's giving me belonging lessons.

Kelly Garrett: Well, What do you think of Utopia?
Kris Munroe: Are you kidding? I'm so disappointed. I thought sex would be running rampant.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, it's running. You just haven't caught up to it yet.

Kelly Garrett: [reading a newspaper clipping] Still No Clue in $2M Skyjack, B.J. Smith Disappears Over Idaho With Money.
Kris Munroe: Hey, I remember that. It was a couple of years ago. This guy extorted money from an airline and then he escaped by parachute. They never did find him or the money.

Kelly Garrett: [on phone with Charlie] About six feet tall, medium build. He wore a stocking mask. Eh, aside from that he was strictly your average closet creeper.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel on the Line (#5.10)" (1981)
Kris Munroe: Well, it sounds to me like we have an unmotivated, random killing by a psychopath.
Kelly Garrett: I agree.
Julie Rogers: I don't agree, about the unmotivated part. However twisted and crazy it is, whoever killed her friend had his reason. We've just got to figure out what it is.

Waitress: You're eating or drinking?
Kelly Garrett: You serve food?
Waitress: Not much, the cooks a fool.
Kelly Garrett: How's the bartender?
Waitress: He's the cook's idiot brother.

Kelly Garrett: I feel like I'm sitting on a keg of dynamite with the fuse lit.

Kelly Garrett: I won't let him make me run scared.
John Bosley: Kelly, if you're not scared, you should be.
Kelly Garrett: I'm scared, I'm just not running.

"Charlie's Angels: Taxi Angels (#5.9)" (1981)
Mac Gossett: Hey, where'd you learn how to drive?
Kelly Garrett: Hold on Mac, we don't have any breaks!
Mac Gossett: You're kidding?
Kelly Garrett: No, I'm not kidding.

Jake Barnett: In a month they'll be busted.
Kelly Garrett: Wrong, Jake! I'll drive for them, I have friends that'll drive for them. We're not gonna let you put them outta business. We're not gonna let you win.

Kelly Garrett: I picked up a 5'4" ventriloquist with a 6'4" dummy.
Kris Munroe: [laughs] I hope you charged them two fares.
Kelly Garrett: Well, I couldn't. The ventriloquist was sitting in the dummy's lap.

Kelly Garrett: Where to?
Mac Gossett: Where ever, eh, I wanna see this town. Just follow the front of the cab, I'll tell you where to turn.
Kelly Garrett: Suit yourself, Mac.
Mac Gossett: Hey, that's my name!

"Charlie's Angels: Marathon Angels (#3.19)" (1979)
Sabrina Duncan: Why don't you two take Sylvia's place and the girl who hasn't signed in yet. What's her name, Cole?
John Bosley: Yeah.
Sabrina Duncan: Yeah.
Kris Munroe: Hold it, hold it. How come all of a sudden we're the ones running?
Sabrina Duncan: Well, you thought of it, and you agreed. Is that reasonable?
John Bosley: Perfectly.
Kris Munroe: Terrific.
Kelly Garrett: Reasonable.

Kelly Garrett: You think the gate guard's gonna buy this? 20A and 20B?
John Bosley: Well, if he says anything, tell him you're part of an entry. You know, like in a horse race.
Kris Munroe: Yeah, but what if he doesn't know from entries? Then what do we do?
John Bosley: You're in running clothes, outrun him.

Kelly Garrett: [referring to Sheick Hassir] Is that the grim reaper or a man in a shawl?
Kris Munroe: Or a very ugly lady in a shawl.
Sabrina Duncan: Well, if you gotta be run down, better by a limo, huh?

Kris Munroe: Mr. Twilliger?
Twilliger: Oh, I thought we said goodbye earlier.
Kelly Garrett: Oh, well we decided to stick around and help you with your problem.
Twilliger: Aw, well, my problem is that you're sticking around.

"Charlie's Angels: Bullseye (#1.9)" (1976)
Kelly Garrett: Charlie Townsend is a no good, sadistic, totally insensitive, male chauvinist pig!

Sgt. Billings: [Impressed by Kelly's results at target practice] You shoot well. Never seen a recruit take to it so quick.
Kelly Garrett: Well, I was raised in Texas. Daddy had me shooting ducks from my stroller.

Jill Munroe: [Complaining about Sgt. Billings' brusque manner] I get the feeling he knows his way around a gas chamber.
Kelly Garrett: Yeah. He must've done his basic training at Auschwitz.

"Charlie's Angels: I Will Be Remembered (#1.20)" (1977)
Sabrina Duncan: Gloria Gibson, huh? I saw every film she ever made. She's just incredible.
Kelly Garrett: Yeah, I saw one of her pictures on TV last week. Ah, a western.
Sabrina Duncan: Right: 'The Sodbusters'.
Jill Munroe: Hey, I remember seeing that too. She played a rancher's wife. She survived cholera, a gunshot wound, a cattle stampede.
Jill Munroe: She's a very heavy lady.
Charles Townsend: [over speaker phone] A very nice lady.

Ed: Hey, what are you doing for dinner?
Kelly Garrett: Oh, I only eat nuts and berries.
Ed: Oy. Some of my relatives do that. Personally I find it disgusting.

Sabrina Duncan: [aiming her gun at bad guy # 1] Hold it! This makes a very nasty hole.
Jill Munroe: [whips out her gun and points it at bad guy # 2] You can't be a beacon if your light don't shine, you know?
Kelly Garrett: [walks up to bad guy # 1 and takes his gun] Whould you think I was pushy if I asked why you were shooting at me?

"Charlie's Angels: Hours of Desperation (#2.15)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: [aiming a gun at Brown & Michaels] I'm gonna ask quick, and I want a quick answer. And I'm in no mood for any cute stuff. Where's Murdock?

Kris Munroe: [to Bri] Would you like something to eat?
John Bosley: No, no, no. You starve a cold, you feed a fever.
Kris Munroe: I thought it was 'feed a cold and starve a fever'.
Kelly Garrett: Well, she has both, so we can go either way.

Kris Munroe: Listen, do you think Bosley will realize that I never drove a stationwagon?
Kelly Garrett: Bri will.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel on My Mind (#3.10)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Does Bosley's arm have a cramp or is he actually reaching for his wallet?

Kris Munroe: Listen, I gotta get going I have an appointment with Piere...
John Bosley: Who's Pierre?
Kelly Garrett: Pierre runs his fingers through her hair.

News Vendor: Times or Harold?
Kelly Garrett: I need a little conversation.
News Vendor: Ah, there's no profit in conversation.
Kelly Garrett: There might be this time. We're looking for this girl.
[hands over a picture]
News Vendor: Ah... that's the one, heh.
Kelly Garrett: Then you've seen her?
News Vendor: Everybody saw her. She wandered into the middle of the street and, eh, almost got hit by taxi.
Sabrina Duncan: Wait a minute, are you sure it was her?
News Vendor: Do I look like a liar?

"Charlie's Angels: Angel on a Roll (#5.14)" (1981)
Kelly Garrett: Well, could you describe Mr. See?
Miss Withers: Well, he couldn't hardly.
Kelly Garrett: Couldn't hardly what?
Miss Withers: See. He wore very thick glasses.

Kris Munroe: [looking at a picture of Ted Markham] Eh, Bosley, you can tell Charlie that I'll take the assignment.
Kelly Garrett: Well...
Julie Rogers: Hey! Wait a minute, don't we get to vote on this or something?
Kelly Garrett: Well, I vote that eh, Mr. Markham spend some of those bills on me.
John Bosley: I would say that you two have been outmaneuvered.

Kelly Garrett: [having just fired a warning shot at Boris] Guess where I'm gonna put the next one if you don't put that gun down?

"Charlie's Angels: Angels Remembered (#3.22)" (1979)
Sabrina Duncan: What, Charlie, what is this, somebody's birthday?
Charles Townsend: [on speaker phone] Good guess, Sabrina, that's exactly what it is.
Kelly Garrett: Well, it's not my birthday...
Sabrina Duncan: Hey, not mine.
Kris Munroe: I had mine last month.
[a beat]
Kris Munroe: Bosley...
Sabrina Duncan: Aw...
John Bosley: I never age.

Charles Townsend: [on speaker phone] Well, my friends, how can I thank you for tree years exciting years?
Sabrina Duncan: [slightly tipsy] Well, I think you just did, Charlie.
Kelly Garrett: And very elegantly.
Kris Munroe: Very.
Charles Townsend: That's just a small token of how I feel.
John Bosley: Oh, not too small, Charlie, wait till you see the bill!
Charles Townsend: Ha ha, this is one bill I don't have to look at, Bosley, you're priceless, Angels.
Kris Munroe: Ah, Charlie, the feeling's mutual.

[last lines]
Charles Townsend: [on speaker phone] Have a good vacation, Angels, I'll be thinking of you.
Kelly Garrett: [raising her glass for a toast] To next year.
Sabrina Duncan: And many, many more.
John Bosley: Here, here!
Kris Munroe: We love you, Charlie.
[they all clink their glasses of very expensive French champagne]

"Charlie's Angels: Hellride (#1.1)" (1976)
Jill Munroe: Charlie, are you in pain?
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] It's my sacro- oh...
Kelly Garrett: Pardon?
Charles Townsend: -iliac, lower lambego. Very stiff.
Jill Munroe: Oh, that's too bad, Charlie. Just how did you hurt your back?
Charles Townsend: The crushing weight of responsibility, angel. But I think it will just be a matter of some deft manipulation before I'll be standing as erect as ever.
[cut to Charlie being massaged by a bikini clad woman standing on his back]

Eddie Dirko: You know they say a man should never be drinking by himself. Causes alcoholism.
Kelly Garrett: Oh?
Eddie Dirko: Now you can levitate that by, eh, joining me at a place called the Pitt-stop bar, you ever been there?
Kelly Garrett: Never, never...

Police officer: Have you been drinking, ma'm?
Kelly Garrett: Not a drop, officer. Clear eye, breath is fresh, kissing sweet!
[blows him a kiss]

"Charlie's Angels: To See an Angel Die (#5.2)" (1980)
Eleanor Willard: I see a white line...
Kelly Garrett: Where, what is the line?
Eleanor Willard: It's from Miss Munroe.
John Bosley: What does it mean?
Eleanor Willard: Well it, it may mean her life.

Julie Rogers: It's really odd, you know?
Kelly Garrett: Well, what do you mean?
Julie Rogers: Well, a few days ago I was alone and then all of a sudden were here together and now, I'm, I'm being torn up inside about a girl I hardly even know.
Kelly Garrett: Well, you can get to like Kris very quickly. I remember I did.

Kelly Garrett: I don't know who you are, but you've got about two seconds to drop that gun. And one of them's already gone.

"Charlie's Angels: Nips and Tucks (#4.21)" (1980)
Kelly Garrett: The woman, do you know who she is?
Angela: [sighs] Well, she was a patient, some time ago. For a long while I thought that's just what it was: a fascination, a pride in what he'd accomplished. You see, she, eh, she is truly beautiful.
Kelly Garrett: Mrs. Redmont, have you taken a look in the mirror lately?
Angela: But it's different, don't you see? He did it. He created her. She was everything. The crystallization of his work, his sense of beauty. Her face came to life at his fingertips. I can't compete with that.
Kelly Garrett: My bet is you can. Much better than you think.

Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] From terrorist to hit-woman in three years. that's quite a move.
Kelly Garrett: Hit-person, Charlie.
Charles Townsend: [over speakerphone] Ah, of course. Hit-person. Sorry, Kelly.

Kelly Garrett: What happened? You were supposed to have Collins.
John Bosley: Yeah, they just now wheeled him into surgery
Kris Munroe: Where's Tiffany?
John Bosley: Redmont's gonna take her in there with him.
Kris Munroe: But she's not a surgical nurse.
John Bosley: I know, and neither are those two goons of Collin's or Barbara whatshername.
Kelly Garrett: You mean they're all in there?
John Bosley: Right.
Kris Munroe: Oh great. Could be the first operation where the patient survives and the docter and the nurse don't.

"Charlie's Angels: Stuntwomen Angels (#5.12)" (1981)
Julie Rogers: Oh Kelly, you were so brave to go first!
Kelly Garrett: What do you mean brave? We drew straws and I lost.
Julie Rogers: I... cheated.
Kelly Garrett: [recoils in shock] Oh, how could you do that?
Julie Rogers: Fear. Simple fear.

John Bosley: [the Angels have just practiced their first stunt jump] Well, I am very impressed.
Julie Rogers: Drop dead.
[punches him in the arm]
Kelly Garrett: Twice.
John Bosley: I thought you weren't speaking to me?

Jake Webner: 'Marion and her Merry Maids'. Well, you're a pretty maid, you know that don't you?
Kelly Garrett: And you sure are a fine figure of a man.
Jake Webner: Oh, she speaks with sweetly blessed lips and each word flies like tender doves on the morning air.

"Charlie's Angels: Avenging Angel (#4.3)" (1979)
Kelly Garrett: Who are you? What are you doing?
Harold Sims: Please, Miss Garrett, let's not waist time with word games. You stole two kilo's of heroin that belong to us. That's street value two million dollars. We want it returned.
Kelly Garrett: Heroin? I don't know anything about any heroin.
Harold Sims: Your obviously a user! And that denial makes you appear quite stupid.

Kelly Garrett: You've been a loser all your life. You were born a loser! And If I had'nt blown it for you four years ago, you would have messed it up on your own!

Frank Desmond: All my life nobody cared about me, much. I mean if they did, I didn't know about it. But when you helped me in there, and when you helped me through that hole in the roof, when you helped me, everything changed somehow. I mean, can you believe that?
Kelly Garrett: If you can.
Frank Desmond: I am obliged to you. Thank you.

"Charlie's Angels: Terror on Skis (#3.16)" (1979)
Sabrina Duncan: I think maybe the best way to find out who they are would be for one of us to act as a sort of a companion to you.
Carl Hansworth: You mean like girlfriend?
Sabrina Duncan: Well, yeah, whatever.
Carl Hansworth: That's a good plan. I nominate you.
[points at Kelly]
Kelly Garrett: [a beat] I accept the nomination.

Carl Hansworth: Have you ever seen a mountain full of fireflies?
Kelly Garrett: I beg your pardon?
Carl Hansworth: Come on.
[grabs her and pulls her of the couch they had been sitting on]

Carl Hansworth: Where is this Vincenti character now?
Kelly Garrett: I guess he's right here, shooting at us.
Chadway: Good guess.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel Hunt (#4.11)" (1979)
Kris Munroe: [the Angel's luggage has been stolen] I'm so stupid, I left my gun in my suitcase.
Kelly Garrett: Don't feel badly, so did I.
Tiffany Welles: Mine's in my purse!
Kris Munroe: Oh, great!
Tiffany Welles: Which is now... in the boat.
Kris Munroe: Not so great.
Kelly Garrett: No.

Kris Munroe: First things first.
Kelly Garrett: Right. Divide and conquer.
Kris Munroe: Who said that?
Kelly Garrett: Tiffany would know.

Kris Munroe: Hey!
Kelly Garrett: What?
Kris Munroe: If I make this call we are blowing our best chance to see what Charlie looks like.
Kelly Garrett: Why, I don't think it would be right to let him keep on worrying, Kris.
Tiffany Welles: It really wouldn't be right.
Kris Munroe: Darn it.

"Charlie's Angels: Chorus Line Angels (#5.11)" (1981)
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Angels, I'm afraid you're going to have to pull out your dancing shoes.
Kelly Garrett: Charlie, my dancing shoes are very, very dusty.
Julie Rogers: Well, that's alright, I'll dust them off for you.
Kelly Garrett: Really?
Julie Rogers: Yeah, as your agent/manager, it's the least I can do.
Kelly Garrett: Clever.

Kelly Garrett: You lay into me like that and I'll climb down your throat.

Kelly Garrett: The clock's ticking, my feet hurt, and tomorrow I have some heavy waltzing.

"Charlie's Angels: Haunted Angels (#3.6)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Well, look, eh, Charlie discovered through his Earthly contacts that 'Cathy Wade' was a ficticious name. Her real name was Cathy Brendleberry.
Kris Munroe: Hm. No wonder she changed it.

Peter Russell: [venturing a guess why Kelly is here] You have been out of body.
Kelly Garrett: Not since puberty.

Kelly Garrett: [Kelly finds a dog guarding Brendleberry's Antiques] Eh, is anybody here?
Mrs. Brendleberry: [off screen] Just you, me and the dog, deary.
Kelly Garrett: He's growling. Will he bite?
Mrs. Brendleberry: Only if you don't buy anything.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel Blues (#2.19)" (1978)
Eban Stone: Look, Amy hired me as back-up guitarist a couple of months ago in Phoenix. We hit off, so eh, naturally I stayed with her.
Kelly Garrett: Hit it off... as in punching her out?

Kelly Garrett: Well, Amy's taste in music was a little off beat. So I guess her taste in men ran the same.
Eban Stone: Lady, what you runnin'? Some kind of riddle contest?

Kris Munroe: [on payphone] Ok, you be careful.
Kelly Garrett: [on carphone] Every day in every way.
[hangs up]

"Charlie's Angels: Dancin' Angels (#4.18)" (1980)
John Bosley: Where's Tiffany?
Kelly Garrett: In the powder room. Something about a toe you stepped on during the tango.
John Bosley: Impossible.

Elton Mills: I, eh, suppose I'll have to dispose of you somehow. I have to think about this.
Kelly Garrett: Take all the time you need.

Elton Mills: You realize of course that I'm very disappointed in you.
Kelly Garrett: I guess I'm not the only one. Who disappointed you I mean. Billy too?
Elton Mills: Well, did you hear what he said about his music? Cornball muck! Did you hear him say that?

"Charlie's Angels: Winning Is for Losers (#3.5)" (1978)
Bill Montclair: Are you interested in golf?
Kelly Garrett: Oh, I play, but I'm just a buffer.
[they laugh]
Kelly Garrett: Or is the word tougher?
Bill Montclair: Well, listen eh, if I get the chance maybe I can talk you into playing around?
Kelly Garrett: Eh...
Bill Montclair: [more awkward laughter] Dang, that didn't come out right, now did it?

Bill Montclair: About two months back we had a rock concert with Alice Cooper.
Kelly Garrett: Really?
Bill Montclair: Yeah. I understand that girl is one heck of a singer.
[Kelly laughs]
Bill Montclair: What's the matter?
Kelly Garrett: Well, Alice Cooper's a guy.
[more laughter]
Bill Montclair: She is?

Kelly Garrett: [Kelly and Bri, both carrying guns, enter room 124] Somebody bailed out of here in a hurry.
Sabrina Duncan: Sure did. Look at this. Left a gunpatch.
Kelly Garrett: What's a gunpatch?
Sabrina Duncan: [sounding a bit annoyed by the question] It's a piece of cloth you use to clean a rifle.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels Belong in Heaven (#3.11)" (1978)
Jellek: Your phone rings a lot.
Kelly Garrett: I have a lot of friends.
Jellek: [losing his temper] Maybe too many friends?
[knocks some flowers off a table]

Sally Miles: Funny, huh? Years later and it's still just like it was in summer camp. You're still taking care of me.
Kelly Garrett: So what are friends for?
Sally Miles: Oh Kelly, you're so dear to me.
Kelly Garrett: Likewise. There's just one thing.
Sally Miles: What?
Kelly Garrett: Next time you think about getting engaged, let me check him out first?

Sabrina Duncan: You know, one thing about professional hitmen: they don't like complications. They want one shot, neat and clean, then a fast exit. So from now on, we'll all walk close together, we'll shift positions, we'll never give him a clear shot, him?
Kelly Garrett: Right. Like Kris said, it beats hiding in corners.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in Chains (#1.4)" (1976)
Kelly Garrett: How long has it been since you've been sprayed?

Maxine: You have half an hour to get ready, girls.
Kelly Garrett: Ready for what?
Maxine: You're going to a party. And believe me, it's an invitation you can't refuse.

Sabrina Duncan: Did you get anything?
Kelly Garrett: You mean beside multiple bruises?
Sabrina Duncan: Don't be like the Lone Ranger. The one I'm with's got hands like a linebacker for the Dallas Cowboys.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on the Run (#2.23)" (1978)
Kris Munroe: There's a direct correlation between a woman's chest and a man's ears.
Sabrina Duncan: I have not heard this theory before.
Kelly Garrett: I haven't either.
Kris Munroe: Well, you see, the lower the neckline, the more tone-deaf they are.

Kelly Garrett: Honey, listen to me. When you had the accident outside Rosie's, they threw a package into your truck. It was full of diamonds.
Larry Kantrelle: [wondering who Kelly is] Who are...
Kelly Garrett: [interrupting] It doesn't matter who they are, I'm your wife and I love you.

Kelly Garrett: You've heard of the good guys and the bad guys?
Nancy Coleman: Yeah, I made some of them what they are.
Kelly Garrett: I'll bet you did.
[a beat]
Kelly Garrett: Anyway, these are the bad guys.

"Charlie's Angels: Mother Goose Is Running for His Life (#2.20)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Order me a black and tan and eh, I'll tell you a lot of things you don't want to hear.
Jack Orwell: Tha'ts bad logic. If I don't want to hear it, why should I listen to it?
Kelly Garrett: They may save your life.

Motorcycle Cop: Hey, what's going on here?
Kelly Garrett: This man's kidnapping me!
Jack Orwell: Kidnap? She's just trying to get me into trouble, officer. We had a lover's quarrel, you know. Would she be driving my van if I was trying to kidnap her?
Kelly Garrett: He's lying, he forced me to drive!
Motorcycle Cop: You call that driving, lady?

"Charlie's Angels: Dancing in the Dark (#1.19)" (1977)
Alexander Cruz: That was yesterday when your name was Walker. Today is today, Mr. Bosley.
John Bosley: And tomorrow is tomorrow is tomorrow.
Kelly Garrett: If we're gonna stand around quoting Shakespeare, it's gonna be a very tedious day.

Kelly Garrett: I'm gonna make you one more offer, Bosley, and you're going to take it: thirty thousand dollars.
John Bosley: Your offers are as tedious as my Shakespeare.

"Charlie's Angels: Magic Fire (#2.11)" (1977)
Kris Munroe: And let met guess. Their bookings were all around the time that the magic man was up to...
Sabrina Duncan: [interrupting] Don't say it!
Kelly Garrett: Up to his old tricks.
Sabrina Duncan: [defeated] She said it.

The Great Danzini: For you... a glass of wine.
[produces it from under a red scarf as if by magic]
Kelly Garrett: [unimpressed] I gather that's what it is.
The Great Danzini: You're certainly blasé. I mean, where did it come from? How could I have known in advance what drink you'd prefer?
Kelly Garrett: You asked the bartender.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel Baby (#2.9)" (1977)
Kris Munroe: Okay, where do we start?
Charles Townsend: [on speaker phone] We start, with Kelly getting pregnant.
Sabrina Duncan: What?
[Kris Laughs]
Kelly Garrett: [nervous laughter] I quit!

Kelly Garrett: Does he have to be here? He makes me antsy.
Leonard Chaffey: Now, eh, what have you got against bodyguards, honey? I might have to guard your beautiful body some day.

"Charlie's Angels: The Vegas Connection (#1.17)" (1977)
John Bosley: We have learned one thing that could tie Mrs. Mallin to Samuels and the truck driver.
Jill Munroe: Mrs. Mallin was a dancer in the chorus line at...
Sabrina Duncan: Mr. and Mrs. Samuels worked as a waiter and a waitress at...
Kelly Garrett: Sydney Carver makes weekly deliveries on Wednesdays to...
John Bosley: ...The Versaile Hotel in Las Vegas.

Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] All right, that's the trail we have to follow. You'll all have to go up to Vegas.
John Bosley: Only problem is: we don't have any real lead once we get there.
Jill Munroe: Charlie, we've got to talk to Mrs. Mallin.
Kelly Garrett: And without that, we could spend six months in Vegas and come back with nothing but a suntan.
Charles Townsend: That's more than a lot of people come back with.

"Charlie's Angels: He Married an Angel (#5.8)" (1981)
Julie Rogers: When a nice, intelligent woman like Monica Regis lies, Charlie, she's definitely in love.
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Hoho, is that how a man tells when a woman's in love, Julie, she lies?
Kris Munroe: Charlie...
John Bosley: And to think I've spend half my life in search of an honest woman.
Kelly Garrett: A fool's pursuit, Bosley.

Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] It seems Professor Thornwood has given us a rather naughty problem, Angels.
Kelly Garrett: If Monica gets hurt, and I know she will, Charlie, I'll personally crucify Thornwood.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels Ahoy (#3.8)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Hi doc, you wanna check out a costume for tonight?
Doc Harris: No, I don't need a costume, my dear. I pretend to be sober, that's my guise...

Kelly Garrett: [referring to suspect Mark Correll] You think you can get a look around his cabin?
Kris Munroe: I don't think that's gonna be a problem.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on Horseback (#2.13)" (1977)
Sheriff Hayden: Boy, you three, you're prettier than fresh fold fillies.
Kelly Garrett: [the Angels giggle] You really know how to turn a phrase, sheriff.
Sheriff Hayden: How's that?
Kelly Garrett: You have a way with words.

Kelly Garrett: We'll contact you if we make any progress. And by the way, we're all incognito.
Sheriff Hayden: In cog what?

"Charlie's Angels: The Jade Trap (#2.22)" (1978)
Ted Machlin: I was gonna spend the next hour being so clever and charming you'd agree to have dinner with me. Can we pretend I was and you will?
Kelly Garrett: [smiles] Lets pretend.

Kelly Garrett: Eh, tell me, what do you do for a living?
Ted Machlin: As little as possible.

"Charlie's Angels: Waikiki Angels (#5.5)" (1981)
Kelly Garrett: Any leads?
Lt. Torres: A few rumors. Nothing we can verify. Word is that a bunch of mainland motorcycle bums have been in some of the bars out that way.
Julie Rogers: Terrific. The Hells Angels go Hawaiian.

Bo Thompson: Hey, how about a little touch, baby?
Kelly Garrett: How 'bout a little distance?
Bo Thompson: Hey, I'm talking to ya, I said how about a little touch?
Kelly Garrett: [forcing him to his knees by gripping his arm] Why don't you get out of here, okay?

"Charlie's Angels: One of Our Angels Is Missing (#4.15)" (1980)
Tiffany Welles: [Kelly and Tiff point their guns at Devlin] Funny.
Kelly Garrett: What?
Tiffany Welles: He doesn't look nearly as good as his picture.

Kelly Garrett: [Beck has just left] His tongue's hanging out.
Tiffany Welles: Lets hope he chokes on it.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel Flight (#2.4)" (1977)
Sabrina Duncan: Yeah, you girls better hit the books. I got some reading of my own to do here... Wonder what Burt Reynolds is up too...
Kelly Garrett: From what I hear, anything you ask.

Gene Knox: It was right after you threw your salad in my lap.
Angela: [correcting him] I threw your salad in your lap.
Kelly Garrett: Well I don't like the salad at Devereaux, either.

"Charlie's Angels: The Prince and the Angel (#4.8)" (1979)
Jill Munroe: Would you mind if I broke our date for lunch?
Kelly Garrett: Depends.
Jill Munroe: On what?
Kelly Garrett: Who's replacing me?
Jill Munroe: Him
[points to Prince Eric, whom she thinks is a salesman]
Kelly Garrett: Hmm. You're forgiven. Do you mind if I have him for dinner?
Jill Munroe: I'll let you know after lunch.

John Bosley: Do you mean, that you were actually picked up in a men's haberdashery?
Jill Munroe: Picked up sounds so declassé... Was I picked up?
Kelly Garrett: I'd say you were confiscated.
Kris Munroe: Well, on a scale of one to ten, how would you rate this confiscation?
Jill Munroe: An eleven.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on Wheels (#1.12)" (1976)
Kelly Garrett: [Attempting to charm the brawny, bare-chested apartment manager who caught her snooping] You know, Red, I think you'd make a great "Stud of the Month." You make Burt Reynolds look like one of the Seven Dwarfs.
Red Loomis: Forget it! You know, you Gloria Steinem-type broads turn me off. Just because a guy's put together right you think he doesn't have a brain in his head. Y'know, I get real tired of being looked at like nothing but a sex object.

Jill Munroe: [Discussing the case with Kelly and Sabrina] One thing I do know: he's not involved in Karen's murder.
Kelly Garrett: Female instinct?
Jill Munroe: Angel instinct.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel on High (#3.3)" (1978)
Sabrina Duncan: Where have you been?
Kelly Garrett: Well, I've, eh... been to about two thousand feet, I've been upside down, downside up, broadways, backways, some ways I can't explain...
Sabrina Duncan: Whaaaat?
Kelly Garrett: Ehm, I drank wine from a paper cup under a tree in a meadow, named an airplane, came home.
Kris Munroe: Ooooh. And what did you do for excitement?

Kelly Garrett: [Bill is preparing his plane] Ah, good. You're not using wax.
Bill Freeman: Wax?
Kelly Garrett: Icarus the Greek? He used wax on his wings.
Bill Freeman: And the sun melted it and he fell to earth.
Kelly Garrett: There's a lesson in there, somewhere.
Bill Freeman: [laughs] Never fly with a Greek guy.

"Charlie's Angels: Attack Angels (#5.13)" (1981)
Steve Briggs: I'd stake my life on it.
Kelly Garrett: You might have to.
Steve Briggs: I don't get it.
Kris Munroe: You're definitely the next target.

Kris Munroe: [holding a suspicious candle stick] Kelly, look at this.
Kelly Garrett: Well, it's not exactly a smoking pistol, Kris.

"Charlie's Angels: Toni's Boys (#4.23)" (1980)
Charles Townsend: [on the phone] I have a nasty feeling someone wanted all of you out of the picture. Do you remember that near miss accident the three of you had last week?
Kelly Garrett: Well, that could have been a coincidence.
Charles Townsend: Maybe, but I don't want to take any chances.

Michael Durano: Divine justice is what I'm after. An eye for an eye, like it says in the Bible. Those six months that I spend in jail were like an eternity in darkness.
Kelly Garrett: How poetic.
Michael Durano: Sweetheart, I'm glad you think so, because an eternity in darkness is what the three of you are going to suffer in return.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel's Child (#4.14)" (1980)
Kelly Garrett: Sergeant Cates, I know how you must feel.
Sgt. Cates: No you don't know how I feel. Or what I feel or how often I feel it. You're an overpaid underworked private eye who's doing this for a fat fee. Now let's stick to business and leave my personal life out of it, okay?

Sgt. Cates: I'll see you in hell!
[Storms out]
Kelly Garrett: [quietly, to herself] I'll see you in court.

"Charlie's Angels: Hula Angels (#5.6)" (1981)
Kelly Garrett: How's your hula?
Julie Rogers: Well, to tell you the truth... a little shaky.
[they all laugh]

Kris Munroe: [picking Kelly up in a 'borrowed' truck] Well, I'm sorry it's not a Rolls Royce, but it's the best we could do.
Kelly Garrett: If it runs, it'll be fine.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in Springtime (#3.4)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Would you like a brandy?
Dr. Slavin: No thank you, and I'd much prefer you didin't either. Alcohol is a depressant. Besides, it might affect your heart beat.
Kelly Garrett: My heart could use a little jazzing up after the last few months.

Kelly Garrett: Not only is my room bugged, but there's a peep hole in there.
Kris Munroe: I'd dress in the closet if I were you...

"Charlie's Angels: Little Angels of the Night (#2.21)" (1978)
Carol: [the Angels are posing as working girls] Well I got these two clients, and they are dying for a party. Bonnie's busy and nobody's available.
Kris Munroe: Oh, gosh, you know, the plane ride was really wild. I'm a little tired and a little shook up.
Sabrina Duncan: I have a, I have a bad back. I'm supposed to stay off my
[catches herself]
Sabrina Duncan: - or on, on my feet. I'm supposed to stay on my feet.
Carol: What about you, Kelly?
Kelly Garrett: Oh, ehm, I, I, I have a cold.
Sabrina Duncan: Ooh, God bless you. You should probably have a sweater on or something or a little wrap.
Kelly Garrett: I feel sick.
Carol: Too bad. These guys look like an awful lotta fun...
Kelly Garrett: Darn. It's a shame we have to miss it.
Sabrina Duncan: Darn it!

Dr. Eggars: [Dr. Edggars has spilled some of his tobacco on Kelly's arm] Oh, oh. Sorry, I'm sorry.
Kelly Garrett: [laughs it off] Oh, no problem. Eh, nice aroma.
Dr. Eggars: Snic.
Kelly Garrett: I beg your pardon?
Dr. Eggars: It's called 'Snic'. That's short for, eh, 'Six Nights in Copenhagen'.
Kelly Garrett: Well, that eh, that sounds like fun.

"Charlie's Angels: The Killing Kind (#1.6)" (1976)
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Sorry to interrupt your pursuits of happiness on a gorgeous day like today, Angels, I've had an emergency come up that needs the feminine touch. This one came in from my ex-wife along with a request for more alimony.
Jill Munroe: I didn't know you were married, Charlie?
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Once was enough to convince me that I am not monogamous by nature.
Kelly Garrett: What a shame.

Kelly Garrett: [having just had a rough massage from Inga] I feel like the Roller derby was just run on my spine. Any minute I thought she was gonna start singing 'Strangers in the night'.

"Charlie's Angels: The Blue Angels (#1.22)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: [In the breakroom at the Academy, Kelly turns to a couple fellow cadets] Say, could you give a girl some change?
Barton: Sure thing, sure
[comes over and slips a coin into the machine]
Barton: . What would you like?
Kelly Garrett: I usually buy my own.
Barton: Well, now I'm buying. That's the change!

Brenda: Want some Taco?
Kelly Garrett: Thanks, might ruin my trip to Tijuana.

"Charlie's Angels: Lady Killer (#1.8)" (1976)
Sabrina Duncan: What about his hair? This secrecy's gone on long enough. How tall is Charlie?
Kelly Garrett: What color are his eyes?
John Bosley: Now, now ladies, you know I cannot divulge anything.
Jill Munroe: Could you at least tell us his shirt size? How else are we gonna get him a present for his birthday?
John Bosley: His birthday? Where were you when it was my birthday? Nobody asked about that, nobody!

Tony Mann: Now they're killing off the centerfolds.
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] That's where you come in.
Kelly Garrett: As centerfolds?
Charles Townsend: [on speakerphone] Kelly, when you took this job you knew there'd be a lot of undercover work.
Jill Munroe: That's not undercover, that's not any cover at all.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in the Wings (#2.10)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: Maybe you could give us some information that might be helpful.
Austin Wells: But I know nothing.
Frank Jason: Or less!

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on Campus (#4.10)" (1979)
Kelly Garrett: I think Tiffany would have looked great behind a harem's veil.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel Trap (#1.13)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: [Addressing Jericho, lying to cover her shocked expression] Would you believe that old man just made a pass at me?
Jericho: [Chuckling] He did? Well, you shouldn't blame him too much. You see, it is our curse and a blessing always to be young inside.

"Charlie's Angels: Dirty Business (#1.16)" (1977)
Sabrina Duncan: [Watching Marvin's "free form" movie] That is NOT the Little Bo Peep I knew and loved as a child.
Kelly Garrett: Yeah, well, this is the unabridged edition.

"Charlie's Angels: One Love... Two Angels: Part II (#4.25)" (1980)
Kelly Garrett: You killed them both, didn't you? Just a few drops of heart attack. There are drugs that can do that, you know.
Linda: [nervously] Glenn?
Glenn Staley: No, it's all right.
Kelly Garrett: But the real poison was greed wasn't it? A greed by the name of Carver Industries.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels at the Altar (#4.4)" (1979)
Sharon: Am I lucky or am I lucky?
Kelly Garrett: [smiles] Maybe a little of both.

"Charlie's Angels: Consenting Adults (#1.10)" (1976)
Kelly Garrett: [about Tracy] She looked really shook.
Sabrina Duncan: Well she wasn't when I was there, butter would've melted in her mouth.

"Charlie's Angels: Rosemary, for Remembrance (#3.21)" (1979)
John Bosley: Well, we're gonna have to have somebody out at the estate, to be a bodyguard.
Tim Stone: Oh, I've arranged for Kris to be Uncle Jake's houseguest.
John Bosley: Oh, well, eh, we were planning on putting Kelly inside the house.
Tim Stone: [glances at Kelly] No, it, it'd better be Kris.
Kris Munroe: Why?
Tim Stone: Uncle Jake...
[nervous smile]
Tim Stone: ... likes blondes. I'll pick you up around three.
[turns and leaves]
Kelly Garrett: [smiles and slaps her thigh] Well, I could've worn a wig...

"Charlie's Angels: Harrigan's Angel (#4.19)" (1980)
Tiffany Welles: Kelly?
Kelly Garrett: What's the matter?
Tiffany Welles: Coffee.
Kelly Garrett: What, what about it?
Tiffany Welles: Mr. Felber didn't offer us any coffee.
Kelly Garrett: So, maybe he wasn't feeling very hospitable?
Tiffany Welles: Yeah, but he acted hospitable, he answered all our questions and he kept smiling at us. Now if a man keeps smiling at you, and he's drinking coffee but he doesn't offer you any, it makes me feel like he's... uneasy, you know what I mean?
Kelly Garrett: I'll think about it.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels Go Truckin' (#4.2)" (1979)
Bobby Lee: How long have you been standing there?
Kelly Garrett: Just a moment or two.
Bobby Lee: Well, I hate to think I've been working on those dirty tires when I could have been standing up here watching you the whole time.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in the Stretch (#3.12)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Do you rate everything to gender, Mr. Gillis?
Carter Gillis: No, I don't. It's an involuntary verbal tick, activated by the desire to make a good impression.

"Charlie's Angels: Disco Angels (#3.15)" (1979)
Simon Owens: Look at yourself. Laying around all day, drinking, wasting your life. Playing records at that club for fools who never work.
Harry Owens: Papa, please, stop!
Simon Owens: You want the truth, Harry? You make me sick!
Kelly Garrett: I'll take a rain check, Harry.
[takes the opportunity to slip out]

"Charlie's Angels: The Seance (#1.11)" (1976)
Kelly Garrett: What do you wear to a séance?
Jill Munroe: Oh, something simple, chic and terribly expensive.

"Charlie's Angels: Counterfeit Angels (#3.14)" (1979)
Kelly Garrett: Good old Charlie. First he lets us live among the wolves, then he throws us to them.

Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (2003)
Kelly Garrett: Angels are like diamonds. They can't be made, you have to find them. Each one is unique.

"Charlie's Angels: Pretty Angels All in a Row (#2.3)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: Are you certain the spider was harmless?
Ben Pawl: Of course it was, I stomped on it!
Kris Munroe: But was it harmless before you stomped on it?
Ben Pawl: Well how should I know? I wasn't gonna let it bite me to find out.

"Charlie's Angels: Game, Set, Death (#2.14)" (1978)
Arlo Spinner: Hey, you got a great sense of humor. You ever think of modeling rackets?
Kelly Garrett: You mean just rackets?
Arlo Spinner: Hm-hm.
Kelly Garrett: Mother would never approve.
Arlo Spinner: Well, would we have to tell her?
Kelly Garrett: I tell mother everything.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on Ice (#2.2)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: Who's Billy?
Max Brown: Billy, well, he's... sort of our gopher, a flunky. Nice fellow. Good, strong back. Above the neck, not so strong.

"Charlie's Angels: Angel Come Home (#3.2)" (1978)
Kelly Garrett: Hello Danny.
[sits down at bar]
Danny Bligh: Well now, don't tell me we've met and I forgot, course, eh, you, eh, I wouldn't forget.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels on Vacation (#3.13)" (1979)
Kelly Garrett: Bosley, level with us. Are you actually picking up the tab for the whole three days in Arizona, food and lodging?
John Bosley: Well no, not actually, Charlie's paying for this little western vacation. Personally, I feel his actions are dangerously generous.
Kelly Garrett: Meaning he'll spoil us?
John Bosley: Meaning that a smart detective is a hungry detective.
Kris Munroe: What about a thirsty detective, Bosley?
John Bosley: Oh yes, his reckless actions also include beverages as well.

"Charlie's Angels: Angels in the Backfield (#2.17)" (1978)
Sabrina Duncan: Lets hope we don't wrap it up by tomorrow...
Kris Munroe: What?
Kelly Garrett: Bri...
Sabrina Duncan: Hm?
Kelly Garrett: You want to play the Panthers?
Sabrina Duncan: I don't want to play the Panthers, I want to beat the Panthers!

"Charlie's Angels: Terror on Ward One (#1.18)" (1977)
Kelly Garrett: The trick is to question them so they won't realize they're being questioned.
John Bosley: Aha. I see. What we need is a sharp eye and a deft, clever. tongue.
Kelly Garrett: That would be wonderful. Bosley. But meanwhile, see what you can find out without blowing it.