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Quotes for
John 'J.D.' Dunne (Character)
from "The Magnificent Seven" (1998)

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"The Magnificent Seven: Witness (#1.4)" (1998)
John "J.D." Dunne: What are you tryin' to do to me, Buck?
Buck: Can I help it if I have animal magnetism?
John "J.D." Dunne: What?
Buck: Animal magnetism. I read about it in a magazine. It-It's a power I got no control over. Once women get a sniff of it, what can I do?
John "J.D." Dunne: Take a bath!

[Josiah prepares to deal]
Josiah: All right, gentleman, this game is called "Read 'em and Weep".
John "J.D." Dunne: I'm out.
Vin: I'm already weepin'.
Josiah: This game is called... solitaire.

[Buck is questioning a prisoner]
Buck: I can't hear a word this boy is sayin'. Can you?
John "J.D." Dunne: Maybe you should try your animal maggotism on him, Buck.
Buck: That's animal magnetism, boy! And you can plainly see it only works on women.


"The Magnificent Seven: One Day Out West (#1.1)" (1998)
J.D. Dunne: Shouldn't we say somethin'?
Vin: Say somethin'?
J.D. Dunne: Some words?
Vin: It's a coffin full a rocks, J.D.
J.D. Dunne: I know, I put 'um there, but shouldn't it look like we're doing somethin'?

Judge Oren Travis: [leveling shot gun] Drop your gun belt.
Lucas James: [surprised] Don't know who I am, do ya?
Judge Oren Travis: No, and I don't care.
Lucas James: Well, you're makin' a big mistake pointin' that thing at me.
Judge Oren Travis: Sawed-off coach gun, double aught buck, should cut all three of you in half.
Lucas James: That stuff in there was self defense. Weren't it, boys?
Judge Oren Travis: He's unarmed, you shot him twice. That's murder in my book.
Lucas James: I admire your courage, old man, but there's three of us and one of you.
Vin: [drinking from a canteen] Hardly sounds fair.
Nathan Jackson: [leading horse] Nope.
Buck Wilmington: Well, howdy... boys.
[sits down]
Lucas James: [sees Chris] You stay outta this, cowboy, this ain't your fight!
Chris Larabee: [to JD] Did he just call me a cowboy, JD?
J.D. Dunne: [almost apologetically] I think he did, Mr Larabee.
Ezra Standish: [dusting himself off] At least once.
Josiah Sanchez: [smiling] He hates that.
Chris Larabee: [smiling, but threatening] You just call me a cowboy?
Lucas James: [backing off] Nah, I was just saying, it ain't your fight.
Chris Larabee: Not yet.
Judge Oren Travis: [advances] Drop the gunbelt.
Lucas James: [bewildered] Who the hell are you?
Judge Oren Travis: I'm a circuit judge. Oren Travis. You're under arrest, young man.
Lucas James: [looks around, drops gun belt]

Ezra: Now that we are rid of that loathsome curmudgeon, you may effect my emancipation.
J.D.: Huh?
Ezra: Let me out.


"The Magnificent Seven: Safecracker (#1.3)" (1998)
J.D.: Hey, you seen my cufflinks?
Olivia Greer: What's a cufflink?

Buck: So, what are we, boys, damned babysitters?
J.D.: Watch your language around the child!
Buck: That's not a child, that's a hellion.


"The Magnificent Seven: Working Girls (#1.2)" (1998)
J.D.: Your mother was a...
Buck: She was a saint.

[last lines]
J.D.: There's much more to those ladies than meets the eye but hell if I can figure it out.
Buck: Welcome to manhood, kid.


"The Magnificent Seven: Inmate 78 (#1.8)" (1998)
J.D.: A three-legged dog walks into the saloon, walks right up to the bartender and says, "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
Ezra: You might want to work on your repertoire, son.


"The Magnificent Seven: The Collector (#1.6)" (1998)
[discussing Casey Wells]
J.D.: She ain't hardly even a girl.
Buck: If you were any blinder, J.D, you'd be walking into walls.