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: What do you do for recreation? The Dude
: Oh, the usual. I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback.
[Maude shows the porn video starring Bunny to the Dude
] Sherry in 'Logjammin'
: [on video
] You must be here to fix the cable. Maude Lebowski
: Lord. You can imagine where it goes from here. The Dude
: He fixes the cable? Maude Lebowski
: Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.
: Also, my rug was stolen. Younger Cop
: The rug was in the car? The Dude
: No. It was here. Younger Cop
] Oh, separate incidents. Maude Lebowski
: [on answering machine
] Jeffrey, this is Maude Lebowski. I need to see you. I'm the one who took your rug. Younger Cop
: Well. I guess we can close the file on that one.
: Did you ever hear of "The Seattle Seven"? Maude Lebowski
: Mmm. The Dude
: That was me... and six other guys.
: Does the female form make you uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski? The Dude
: Uh, is that what this is a picture of? Maude Lebowski
: In a sense, yes. My art has been commended as being strongly vaginal which bothers some men. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. The Dude
: Oh yeah? Maude Lebowski
: Yes, they don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson. The Dude
: Do you like sex, Mr. Lebowski? The Dude
: 'Scuse me? Maude Lebowski
: Sex. The physical act of love. Coitus. Do you like it? The Dude
: I was talking about my rug. Maude Lebowski
: You're not interested in sex? The Dude
: You mean coitus?
: Uli Kunkol? Her co-star in the beaver picture? The Dude
: Beaver? Uhhhh, you mean vagina...? I mean, you know the guy? Maude Lebowski
: Oh, I might have introduced them for all I know.
[looks at Knox
] Maude Lebowski
: You remember Uli? Knox Harrington
: My father's weakness is vanity, hence the slut.
: Now, what happened to your face? Did Jackie Treehorn do that as well? The Dude
: Ah, no that was the chief of police of Malibu. A real reactionary.
: The story is ludicrous.
: Uh, and then, uh, the music business, briefly. Maude Lebowski
: Oh? The Dude
: Yeah. Roadie for Metallica Maude Lebowski
: Oh. The Dude
: Speed of Sound Tour Maude Lebowski
: Mm-hmm. The Dude
: Bunch of assholes.
: My father and I don't get along, he doesn't approve of my lifestyle and, needless to say, I don't approve of his. Still, I hardly wish to make my father's embezzlement a police matter, so I'm proposing that you try to recover the money from the people you delivered it to. The Dude
: Well, I could do that... Maude Lebowski
: If you successfully do so, I will compensate you to the tune of 10 percent of the recovered sum. The Dude
] A hundred... Maude Lebowski
: Thousand, yes bones or clams or whatever you call them.
: Jeffrey. The Dude
: ...Maude? Maude Lebowski
: Love me. The Dude
: That's my robe.