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Quotes for
Whistler (Character)
from Blade (1998)

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Blade (1998)
Whistler: Christ! I'm too old for this! Somebody get me a goddamn wheelchair!

Dr. Karen Jenson: Who are you people?
Whistler: My name's Abraham Whistler. You've met Blade.

Whistler: You have to understand, they're everywhere. Chances are you seen 'em yourself, and didn't know it. On the subway or in a bar.

Whistler: There's a war going on out there. Blade, myself, a few others, we've tried to keep it from spilling over onto the streets. Sometimes people like yourself get caught in the cross fire.

Whistler: We kill as many of 'em as we can find. But it's getting worse.

Whistler: Frost is trying to trigger a fuckin' vampire apocalypse. There's some kind of vampire God he's trying to resurrect.
Blade: La Magra.
Whistler: You're the key. He needs your blood. The blood of the day walker. You're the chosen one.

Dr. Karen Jenson: So what do you use then? Stakes? Crosses?
Whistler: Crosses don't do squat.

Quinn: Oh, lookie here.
[he removes a silver stake from Blade's holster]
Quinn: Silver. Nice craftsman ship, huh? Probably cost you a pretty penny. Now this here is a man who takes his job just a little too seriously, don't you think? Come to think of it, Blade, I owe you one.
[he stabs the stake into Blade's shoulder]
Quinn: Actually, if you want to get technical, Blade...
[lifts another stake]
Quinn: I owe you two.
[Blade starts laughing]
Quinn: Oh, what's so funny, bright eyes?
Blade: I'm expecting company.
[Quinn looks closer, and sees the radio piece in Blade's ear, which is chattering. The wall explodes behind them]
Whistler: Catch you fuckers at a bad time?

Whistler: [after Dr Karen Jenson sees him inject Blade with the serum and runs away] Wander off the beaten path, Doctor.

Dr. Karen Jenson: You been listening in the whole time?
Blade: Keeping radio contact.
Whistler: Think I'd let him run loose without a chaperon?

Whistler: Blade's mother was attacked by a vampire while she was pregnant. She died, but he lived. Unfortunately, he'd undergone certain genetic changes. He can withstand garlic, silver, even sunlight. And he's got their strength. This time tomorrow, all those wounds of his will be healed. He still ages like a human, though. You see, vampires age slower than us. Unfortunately, he also inherited their thirst.

[Whistler hands Blade a UV flashlight]
Blade: Still heavy.
Whistler: But, you're so big.

Dr. Karen Jenson: Why do you hunt them?
Whistler: I had a family once - wife, two daughters. Then a drifter came calling one evening, a vampire. He toyed with them first. Tried to make me decide which order they'd die in.

Dr. Karen Jenson: So, am I a prisoner here?
Whistler: Not at all. We just had to take certain precautions before we let you go. You got to understand, they're everwhere. Vampires. A Hominus Nocturna. We hunt them you see, moving from one city to the next, tracking their migrations. They're hard to kill. They tend to regenerate.
Dr. Karen Jenson: And I'm supposed to believe all this?
Blade: Well, you already met Mr. Crispy at the hospital. What do you think?

Blade II (2002)
Scud: So B-man, what do you think?
Blade: Sounds like a plan.
Whistler: What do you really think?
Blade: They're gonna fuck us the first chance they get.

Blade: How do you feel?
Whistler: Like hammered shit.

Scud: Tell me somethin'. How's the weather up there, sweetheart?
Whistler: [being pelted by rain] Walkin' on sunshine, toad boy.

Reinhardt: [watching Whistler shine a bright light around a dark tunnel] We're tryin' to attract 'em... not scare 'em off.
Whistler: Yeah, well some of us can't see in the dark, you fucking nipplehead. What am I supposed to do?
Chupa: [slaps Whistler with a pair of night-vision goggles] Bifocals, Grampa. Try to keep up.

Whistler: Better get you some sunscreen, Buttercup.
Chupa: Listen, shit kicker! You're about one cunt hair away from hillbilly heaven.
Whistler: I love it when you talk dirty.

Whistler: How'd you two hook up?
Scud: I was backpackin'. Met these two chicks. Decided to take 'em back to my, uh, tent for a little "Three's Company" action.
[opens his shirt to reveal horrible scarring across his chest and abdomen]
Whistler: Purdy.
Scud: Next thing I know Janet and Chrissy start tearing chunks outta my stomach. Blade shows up, saves my ass, everything else just sorta fell into place.

Whistler: What are you looking for?
Scud: Phosphor rods. If I can suss out the light source, maybe I can make some sorta UV flash-bang grenade or somethin'.
Whistler: Been tried already.
Scud: Yeah, but you didn't have the Scudster working on it then, now did you?

Whistler: How'd you find me?
Blade: Started out in Moscow then Romania. They kept moving you around.
Whistler: How long was I gone? Months?
Blade: Too long.
Whistler: [to himself] Years.

Whistler: They tortured me almost to death, and then let me heal in a vat of blood so they could go at it again. Sorry sons of bitches could've at least fixed my damn leg while they were at it.

Blade: We'll play along for now. They'll take us in deeper than we've ever been. Get a chance to see how their world really ticks.
Whistler: I had enough of their world. They're just shitting bricks just because they're no longer top of the food chain.

[as Whistler tries to join Blade in entering the House of Pain]
Whistler: Let's go.
Chupa: You won't pass for one of us. No way.
Whistler: Like I give a shit.
Blade: No, he's right. Why don't you post up on the roof over there? Cover our backs.
Whistler: So the Bloodpack's callin' the shots now, huh? Great.
Reinhardt: Better curb that dog of yours or we'll do it for you.
[Blade arms the bomb. Reinhardt freezes]
Blade: Keep pushing, asshole.
[disarms bomb]

[after Scud has just been blown up by a bomb]
Whistler: I was just startin' to like him.

Scud: [after revealing he's a familiar] They needed my help to bring you here to control Nomak. The old fuck, he was always just bait. I mean, look at him. He's your only real weakness, man. You may be fast, you may be strong and all that other bullshit, but in the end, B, you're just too human!
[punches Whistler in the face]
Whistler: Well, you little shit!
[Scud punches him again]
Scud: You think they scoped out my security system? I let them in, asshole!

Blade: Trinity (2004)
Abraham Whistler: Congratulations, you're famous. Somebody nailed us. Faces all over the papers, televisions. Media's eating it up.
Blade: Like I care.
Abraham Whistler: Well, you should. Somethin' like this, takin' out a human, as far as the rest of the world is concerned, you're public enemy #1.
Blade: Didn't notice it was a popularity contest.

[the SWAT team converges on Whistler, dying after being shot in the back]
SWAT Member: Move a finger and you're dead!
Abraham Whistler: [raises his middle finger, while holding a radio detonator] How's about this one?
SWAT Member: He's got something in his hand!
Abraham Whistler: Get out, Blade!
[the building goes up in an explosion]