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Quotes for
Jazz (Character)
from "The Transformers" (1984)

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Transformers (2007)
Jazz: Is that all you got, Megatron?
Megatron: Come here, you little cretin!
[Megatron grabs Jazz, but Jazz opens fire with his blaster]
Jazz: You want a piece of me? You want a piece?
Megatron: No, I want TWO!
[rips Jazz in half]

Jazz: It's Megatron! Retreat! Move! Fall back!

Jazz: [jumping on Devastator] Come on, Decepticon punk!

Jazz: What's crackin' little bitches?
[does a somersault]
Optimus Prime: My first lieutenant. Designation: Jazz.
Jazz: This looks like a cool place to kick it!

Jazz: What about Bumblebee? We can't just leave him to die and become some human experiment!
Optimus Prime: He'll die in vain if we don't accomplish our mission. Bumblebee is a brave soldier. This is what he would want.

Jazz: Fire it up, Optimus!

Optimus Prime: Autobots, roll out!
Jazz: We rollin'!

"Transformers: Animated: Five Servos of Doom (#3.6)" (2009)
Jazz: Diggin' the new armor, specially Yoketron's helmet. He'd be proud to have you wear it.
Prowl: Thank you. I plan to do everything in my power to be worthy of it.

Prowl: It's a signal beacon. We've been duped.
Jazz: Deceived by a Decepticon. Who'd have thought?

"The Transformers: Countdown to Extinction (#1.12)" (1984)
Jazz: Hey Optimus, how'd you like to hear the number one on the Decepticon hot cassette charts?
Optimus Prime: As I believe the Earthlings say... lay it on me, man.

Bumblebee: Hey Prime, what do you think Megatron's gonna do to Starscream?
Optimus Prime: Nothing gentle, I would say.
Jazz: I think we seen the last of ol' Starcreep alright! And that's the first thing that's gone right all day.

"The Transformers: More Than Meets the Eye: Part 1 (#1.1)" (1984)
Optimus Prime: Any luck, Jazz?
Jazz: Negative. The other side of Cybertron's blacker than the inside of a drive-shaft.

Optimus Prime: Jazz, organize a battle unit. We're going after them.
Jazz: Prowl. Trailbreaker. Wheeljack. Ironhide. Mirage. Sunstreaker. Sideswipe. Autobots, start your engines! Ready Prime.
Optimus Prime: Let's roll!

Transformers: War for Cybertron (2010) (VG)
Jazz: There's plenty of me to go around.

Jazz: Get in line, it's beat down time.

"Transformers: Animated: The Elite Guard (#2.1)" (2008)
Jazz: [Jazz transforms into a race car] Any species that can come up with a sweet ride like this cann't be all bad

Jazz: Man... That was some funky blinked color light show! What you call those things again?
Bulkhead: Traffic lights

The Transformers: The Movie (1986)
Jazz: Roger me. Wilco me. Anything. Hello. Hello. Earth?
Blaster: I'm pickin' up a faint signal!
[He transforms into a ghetto blaster and monitors the message]
Jazz: This is Jazz. A ginormous weird lookin' planet just showed up in the suburbs of Cybertron.
Cliffjumper: And it's attacking Moon Base One...
[static obscures the message]
Ultra Magnus: Jazz! Cliffjumper!

Jazz: [sees Unicron] Where'd that come from?
Cliffjumper: Who cares? I'm more worried about where it's going.

"The Transformers: Megatron's Master Plan: Part 2 (#2.16)" (1985)
[after they were found guilty on most unfair trial and banished from earth, the Autobots are on the spacecraft, provided them by Berger, while Cosmos is flying outside the ship, believing they are on the way to Cybertron. Unknown to them, Megatron sabotaged Teleraan 1, altering the ship destination to the sun and destroying the computer's communications]
Ironhide: Are we going anywhere, Cosmos, or is this a tour of the stars?
Jazz: Lay off him, Ironhide. He didn't cause our problems.
Ironhide: You're right. Maybe we ought to take it out on the one who got us into this mess
[Ironhide clutches his fists]
Optimus Prime: I did what was necessary.
Huffer: But we lost, and the Decepticons won, and we bought a one-way ticket to nowhere!
Cliffjumper: There's still time to change our mind...
[Cliffjumper stands and rushes to the cockpit]
Optimus Prime: [muses loudly] Perhaps I did make the wrong decision... Cliffjumper, turn us around. We're going back to Earth!
Cliffjumper: [clicking the controls, then recoils in horror] The ship isn't responding!
Optimus Prime: What?
Cliffjumper: [clicking the controls, then turns to Optimus] Major malfunction. Our course is locked in!
Optimus Prime: [realizing what's wrong] They've jammed our guidance system! Hound, check our destination.
Hound: At once, Prime.
[Hound activates his sensors, then exclaims in horror]
Hound: We're targeted for... the sun!
[Hearing this, the Autobots are at panic, exclaiming "What?" "The sun?"]
Optimus Prime: [regaining his composure] Cosmos, make up with Teletraan 1.
[Cosmos activates his communication system, then calls in horror when this also fails]
Cosmos: Negative, Prime! I can't interface!

"Transformers: Animated: TransWarped: Part Three (#3.3)" (2009)
Sentinel Prime: Sir, yes, sir!
Jazz: I can dig it.

"The Transformers: The Ultimate Doom: Brainwash (1) (#1.8)" (1984)
Jazz: Thanks for the crazy waterskis, Wheeljack! I always wanted to play motorboat!
Sunstreaker: Ah, I wish they were painted to match my base coat. They clash.

"The Transformers: Blaster Blues (#2.21)" (1985)
[Blaster transmits the concert to the Autobot base]
Optimus Prime: My audio receptors! What is that noise?
Hoist: Humans call it 'music'.
Sparkplug Witwicky: Not this human!
Jazz: [dances] Sounds all right to me!

"The Transformers: Attack of the Autobots (#2.10)" (1985)
Jazz: Like, wow! Rock and roll with real rocks!
Sparkplug Witwicky: It's called an avalanche!

"Transformers: Robots in Disguise: Can You Dig It? (#1.10)" (2015)
Jazz: Is it time for my solo?

"Robot Chicken: Junk in the Trunk (#1.1)" (2005)
Optimus Prime: Hi. I'm Optimus Prime. What you've just seen was a dramatization of what you, your friends, and your family go through if you don't get regular prostate exams. Now, we transformers don't have organic internal organs and can't get cancer, but you do... and you can.
Jazz: So get your ass checked out before it's too late, turkeys!

"Transformers: Animated: Where Is Thy Sting? (#3.5)" (2009)
[it's raining on Earth]
Sentinel Prime: Liquid falling from the sky? What is wrong with this planet?
Jazz: Crazy! It's like a planet and a car wash! You diggin' this or what?

"The Transformers: Fire in the Sky (#1.13)" (1984)
[first lines]
Spike Witwicky: Wow... that's the biggest snowman I ever saw!
[the snowman crumbles... ]
Jazz: Not snowman, Spike - snowbot!

"The Transformers: Dinobot Island: Part 2 (#2.4)" (1985)
[near the third time-warp, the two gangs, bikers versus cowboys, hold their positions, staring at each other threateningly. The bikers' leader starts his bike toward the cowboys, and the rest of the bikers follow. The cowboys spread to the sides of the road]
Cowboys gang leader: Whoa there! Come on, let's whop these urban tenderfeet!
[the cowboys leader rides his horse toward the bikers' leader. the two gang leaders head for each other. The biker gang leader pulls out metal chain, but before he manages to use it, the cowboy gang leader jumps at him, both crash to the ground. The biker's motorcycle continues to drive, into the other bikers, causing chaos among them. One of the cowboys tries to ride the abandoned motorcycle, bumps into a tree and gets thrown away from the motorcycle. The two gang leaders engage in fist fight, but then Prowl, Jazz, Red Alert and Inferno arrive at the scene]
Prowl: [transforms] Okay, let's straighten out this mess...
[the other Autobots transform too]
Cowboys gang leader: Talkin' horseless carriages? What's next?
[the cowboys draw their guns]
Prowl: Disarmament... acid pellet style!
[Prowl shoots acid pellets at the cowboys, reducing their guns to useless metal scraps]
Jazz: Next, how 'bout number one on the bottom forty!
[Jazz activates his loudspeakers, making very loud music. The cowboys cover their ears painfully]
Cowboys gang leader: This trail's spooked, boys! Mount up!
[the cowboys mount their horses, attempting to ride away from the area]
Cowboys gang leader: We're ridin'!
Red Alert: [Blocks the cowboys' way] Not in this direction, boys! Don't you dare!
[Red Alert shoots in front of the cowboys. The horses stop in fear]
Red Alert: Pitch in, Inferno, or do you want me to do it all by myself?
Red Alert: [stepping forward] Let me put out their fire for good...
[Inferno sprays the cowboys and their horses with bursts of CO2 foam, forcing them to the opposite direction, toward the time-warp. The cowboys, who have had enough, ride into the time-warp. Shortly after they disappear into the warp, it closes and vanishes without a trace. Meanwhile the bikers watch in amazement]